“This is what you want,” he growls, jerking my bounded hands behind my back as he fucks me harder and harder with forceful fingers.
“Zeke,” I whimper from the anger in his voice. “Please don’t,” I cry from the aggression in his brutal touch. Blinded by the rage that I activated, he’s lost to me. The memories, all those feelings he kept locked away, I turned the key and forced them out.
“You want me to,” he says, voice low and gritty, “to be a monster.” He grabs my shirt, tearing it open. “To be like him?” He starts pulling on my pants. “Is that what you fucking want?” He releases my wrists and reaches for own pants. He’s so far gone, breathing heavy, focused solely on undoing his jeans. “Is that what−”
“No!” I push him in the chest, barely jerking his rigid body. This is why he doesn’t sleep with virgins. That man tried, maybe even succeeded in taking his innocence. I have to make him see with me, for me, it will be different. I have to bring him back to me. “Zeke!” I hit him again. “Stop!” I grab his arm and his fidgeting hands finally cease.
Head lowered, every muscle in his body catches up with his hands. He remains motionless for a few long seconds. The only sound in the room his heavy, labored breathing. I want to reach out and touch him, but too afraid of his response, I stand silently waiting.
His body rises. He shifts to my left and punches the wall. “Fuck!” He pulls back and strikes it again. “Fuck!” Fist remaining on the cracked drywall, his hand opens up and he rests his palm upon it. His forehead follows, resting slowly against the wall.
My heart, it’s breaking wide open. I turn to my side and lean into the door. Lifting an unsteady hand, I touch his back. I run my fingers along his tense muscles.
His head turns and his beautiful gold-speckled eyes seep into me, drowning me in his emotions. I feel them all; the pain, the shame, the guilt, but the longer I stay above water, taking in every single suffocating emotion, I feel something else. It’s the strongest emotion of all, and he’s not trying to hide it.
In his eyes, I see what I feel for him. It wades to me, soaks through me, filling me with hope.
He pushes back from the wall and his hand comes up. He sifts it through my hair, and his warm, tender fingers wrap around my nape. “I’m sorry if I scared you, baby.” He draws me in for a slow and gentle kiss. I float within the safe, firm grip of his touch. His mouth leaves me. I look up and my heart skips a beat from the vulnerable affection I find in his eyes. “I’ve been so fucked up. The moment that I met you, I lost all control,” he says, lightly caressing my neck with his thumb. “And you’re right. I’m afraid of you. Fuck, when I first saw you, I was afraid to get too close. When I got too close, I was afraid to kiss you. When I kissed you, I was afraid to touch you. When I touched you, I was afraid to let you into my heart. Now that you’re in my heart, I’m afraid to lose you.” He brushes his lips across mine. “I’ve never felt like this before, and I tried, sweetheart, but I can’t fight it anymore. I surrender. Whatever you want to know, I’ll tell you. Whatever you need from me, I’ll give it to you. I’m so sorry that I scared you.”
“You didn’t scare me.” I gaze up at him, seeing apprehension in his eyes. “Ya know all these years, I saved myself for the perfect guy and when I couldn’t find him, I gave up. I came here looking for the best damn lay in Galveston County. I was ready to give myself to him.” I palm his cheek. “But instead, I ended up finding my perfect guy. It’s you, Zeke. And, baby, you’re not taking away my innocence.” I tip up on my toes to get closer to his mouth. “I’m giving it to you,” I whisper before leaning forward to detain his trembling lips.
He pulls my body against his with a low growl and deepens the kiss. His hands run down my spine, cupping my ass. Impulsively, my legs lift and they wrap around his hips. His mouth shifts to my neck, and again in his warm, capable hands, I’m floating. He carries me to his room, kicking the door behind us. Us ...
“Lurlene,” he breathes my name against my ear, shivers run all through me. “I don’t want to disappoint you.” He pulls back from my neck. “But tonight, you’re not going to get the best damn lay in Galveston County.” He lowers me onto the bed and stands up. Eyes glowing down at me, he strips his shirt off and tosses it onto the floor. “Tonight, I’ll go slow.” He unzips his pants. “Tonight, I’ll be gentle.” He removes his jeans and boxer, rising in all his hard smoothness and strength. “Tonight, I’ll give you something I’ve never given anyone before. Tonight, I will give you all of me.”