I sat in the shop for the rest of the afternoon and glumly thought about the best thing to do. In the end, after much deliberation, I came to the conclusion that I was worrying over nothing. If Alice had asked it meant that she must have spoken to Ben first, and if he hadn’t been bothered about it then perhaps I’d been over-thinking it. Three years had passed since our one night together. I reasoned it was silly of me to keep thinking of it so highly and giving it such importance, especially as Ben was clearly so happy and in love … as was I.
I phoned Alice back later that night. Robert was watching the football in the other room and I’d just cleaned up after dinner. I sat at the kitchen counter, gulping on a large glass of rosé, while I waited for her to pick up.
‘It’s Maddy,’ I heard her whisper, presumably to Ben, as she brought the phone to her ear. ‘Hello, you.’
‘Hey, Alice. So sorry about earlier, there was a sudden mad rush. All of Chiswick’s loyal art collectors must have dashed out at once to find something new.’
‘Not at all, don’t worry,’ she laughed. ‘I should’ve called tonight when I knew you were at home. It just suddenly popped into my head and I got a bit excited about the idea.’
‘Honestly, it’s no problem at all,’ I smiled, still finding her cheeriness as infectious as ever.
‘So, what do you think? Are you up for doing something similar with us?’
‘Yes, definitely. I think it’ll be a lovely thing for you guys to do.’
‘Nothing mad, we don’t need to go crazy with it – just some of us wrapped up all cosy and walking along somewhere pretty would be lovely. Something nice and chilled so that Ben doesn’t feel like an idiot.’
‘That sounds doable,’ I nodded to myself.
‘Are you sure it’s okay?’
‘Definitely. Consider it an engagement present from us,’ I offered.
‘Oh, Maddy, thank you. That’s so kind. We could even do it when we come to you next, if you like? Save you lugging all your equipment across London.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Yes! It makes sense.’
‘Perfect. Robert can be my assistant and then we’ll go have dinner afterwards.’
‘Brilliant. Thanks again, Maddy.’
‘It’s a pleasure,’ I insisted, bringing the glass to my mouth and sloshing more wine down my gullet.
Two Sundays later we took a leisurely stroll down by the river in the wintry sunshine. Ben and Alice hand in hand, me running ahead with my camera up at my face and Robert running alongside me holding my tripod, light reflector, spare lenses, memory cards and batteries, looking like a clueless (but enthusiastic) donkey. We snapped as we went, making most of the shots natural with Ben and Alice just talking and laughing with each other, looking all cosy beneath the mountains of layers they were wearing – Alice in a khaki fitted woollen coat, thick grey tights and flat leather boots, Ben in a sheepskin coat, faded jeans and chunky Timberlands. They did their best to ignore the fact that we were even there.
I was enjoying myself. I had my photographer’s head on and had managed to detach myself completely from who I was photographing. My main focus was making sure the shots all looked good through the camera, that they were framed nicely by the sparse trees and river, and that I was positioning myself correctly so that I could capture them at their best. I was relieved to be finding it so easy.
Walking along we eventually came to a pretty bend in the river, offering a great view of London’s skyline in the far distance. I instantly knew it would be a lovely spot to get a few more posed shots, if they were keen.
‘Okay, shall we just stop here a second?’ I called, getting out of the way of a nosy group of elderly people who had been trailing behind us, trying their best to see what we were up to.
‘I was thinking you guys should rest against here,’ I said, tapping the barrier by the river. ‘It’ll be great to get some close-up stills – I think we’ve nailed the whole romantic walking thing now. You’re pros at that.’
‘What should we do?’ asked Alice as she jumped into position, holding her arm out for Ben to walk into, eager to get going straight away.
‘Pose like you’re in love,’ joked Robert.
‘Thank you,’ I said, shooting him a warning look to shut up, knowing his input would deter us from what was going on. ‘Just snuggle into each other a bit. We can do some of you looking at one another, away dreamily into the distance as you contemplate your lifetime of happiness together and then a few down the lens.’
I ignored Robert as he scoffed next to me. That jargon usually worked for others, but I’d forgotten I had Mr Romance-Is-For-Pansies stood by my side … although it probably was a bit much.