As soon as we had sat down to dinner and ordered some wine, I decided to get to the root of what was going on with Alice.
‘Are you okay?’ I asked, taking the red cotton napkin from its fan-like position on the table and placing it over my lap.
Her eyes widened in embarrassment as she looked up at me.
‘Yes!’ she said slowly, picking up her own napkin and unfolding it. ‘It’s just I’m aware that we’ve done all of this the wrong way round.’
‘Done what?’
‘This,’ she said, waving her hand manically between us both, the napkin flapping around in the air. ‘You’ve seen me naked before even finding out my second name.’
‘Oh, right,’ I smiled, heartened by the sweetness of it all. ‘So what is it, your second name?’
‘Turner,’ she said calmly, neatly placing the cloth over her thighs.
‘Alice Turner.’
‘And yours is Gilbert,’ she stated with a coy smile.
‘Yes!’
‘See, I knew that. Oh, I don’t know,’ she sighed, as she put her head in her hands, seemingly embarrassed. ‘I made it so easy for you. I don’t usually do that. You know, what happened the other night. I’m surprised you even called. I wouldn’t have if I was you. What a tart.’
I laughed, unsure how to respond. Alice was cute. Her girlie nerves made me feel protective – they made me want to reassure her. ‘Well, I did. Plus, and I really don’t want to point this out, but, if you’re a tart, that makes me a tart … so at least we’re in good company with our tarty ways.’
She let out one of her sweet giggles as she visibly started to relax.
Once the waiter, Antonio with his signature moustache, had poured us some wine and taken our orders – we’d both gone for spaghetti and meatballs, with a side of cheesy garlic bread – I focused my attention on finding out more about Alice Turner.
‘So, come on, then. Out with it. I’m ready to find out everything about you.’
‘Everything?’ she asked, raising her eyebrows as she sipped on her wine.
‘Yes.’
‘That could take a while …’
‘True. Good job we have time, then,’ I shrugged.
‘And I’m not that interesting,’ she smiled.
‘Maybe just some highlights into the world of Alice Turner, then. Give me five fun facts.’
‘Ooh, the pressure is on!’
‘Make them good,’ I teased.
‘How to make myself sound fun and desirable …’ she pondered with a smile, as she rested her chin on the palms of her hands and tapped her fingers against her cheeks. ‘Okay, fact one, I study English Language and am in my third year, which, yes, means that we’ve been in the same city for three years and never actually spoken.’
‘How weird!’
‘Not really. I’ve seen you around but you’ve usually been with a girl, a redhead, so I assumed you two were an item until Roger told me otherwise. Plus, I was dating this guy for most of that time – a loser. Unimportant,’ she said, waving her hand to dismiss him further with a grimace on her face.
‘Ha! Carry on,’ I beckoned, wanting to swiftly move past the fact that Maddy had been brought up; something I didn’t want us to dwell on for too long.
‘Fact two, I grew up in Brentwood, Essex, with my mum, dad, and little brother, George.’
‘An Essex girl?’
‘Why does everyone say it like that?’ she said with a bemused frown.
‘Like what?’
‘You know.’
‘No …’
I did.
‘Wipe that grin off your face, mister. Contrary to popular belief, us Essex girls do actually have brains – we’re not all handbags and white stilettos.’
‘Clearly,’ I smiled, enjoying the glimpse of her feisty side.
‘Fact three, I thought I was going to be a time traveller like Dr Who when I grew up, until I found out that he was fictional and that it wasn’t an actual job. So, now I want to be a journalist.’
‘You followed up your argument about having brains with admitting you wanted to be a time traveller?’
‘Ha! Fair play, but I was young.’
‘Oh, forgiven, then,’ I nodded, enjoying teasing her. ‘So, what sort of journalist?’
‘A features writer for some big, fat, glossy magazine!’
‘Sounds great.’
‘Gosh, these were meant to be interesting facts!’
‘They are!’ I laughed.
We paused as the waiter came back over with a basket of bread and butter.
‘Okay, fact four, I have a slight obsession with giraffes. Nothing major, but I do have a giraffe onesie that I like to chill out in …’