I sprinted down the stairs.
‘Hey …’ he purred when I picked up.
‘Hey, you,’ I said back as I curled myself into the corner of the hallway floor and coyly fiddled with the telephone cord, grinning to myself with giddiness.
‘I can’t stop thinking about you.’
‘You only saw me ten minutes ago,’ I laughed, relieved that I wasn’t alone in my thoughts.
We hadn’t really talked on the coach coming home, we were both shattered from our busy week and all the excitement on our last night. Instead I’d tucked myself into Robert’s toned chest (yes, what a delicious treat), and we’d both slept most of the way. Okay, there was some more kissing too … but my point is there was not a lot of talking.
‘I miss you.’
‘Already?’
‘Yep.’
‘I’m sorry, who is this? What have you done to Robert?’
A gentle laugh came from the other end of the line, making a smile spring to my cheeks.
It’s surprising how content you can feel, even in a silence, and there was a lot of silence on that first phone call as a new sense of shyness fell over us both.
Eventually Robert attempted to get to the root of why he’d phoned, ‘I was calling because … I don’t want you to feel like you’re just … I dunno … just another girl … because, you know … you’re not like anyone else,’ he sighed. ‘You know I think the world of you. I really like you …’
‘Robert?’
‘Yes?’
‘What are you trying to say?’
‘Do you want to be my girlfriend?’ he blurted.
I cackled into the phone.
‘You’re not meant to laugh!’
‘But it’s you – you asking me that! Robert who’s known me forever, one of my best mates!’
‘And?’
‘It’s weird.’
‘Bad weird?’
‘No!’
‘What then?’
‘What if it all goes wrong?’
‘It won’t.’
‘How do you know that?’
‘Because I won’t let it,’ he said quietly.
I smiled into the phone.
From the tone of his voice I could tell he was smiling too when he asked again, ‘So, will you be my girlfriend?’
How could I possibly refuse?
After years of poking fun at the hoards of girls who swooned at Robert’s charms, I’d found myself giving up the fight and joining in. I was swooning, swooning bad! It was quite unsettling.
And so, as a result of that conversation and us becoming an official item, I knew the cinema trip had turned into our first date for Robert. At first I wanted it to be too, if I’m honest, but I was aware Ben was meant to be coming with us and that we couldn’t just ditch him or make him feel unwanted because we’d hooked up. I also knew about his little breakdown – mums talk, after all. June phoned my mum the next day, unsure of what to do – it can’t have been easy seeing her happy-go-lucky son crumble like that. I felt bad knowing about it, especially as I knew Ben would hate that I knew, but at least it meant I could try my best to make sure Ben wasn’t feeling left out or made to feel uncomfortable. I didn’t want him to feel like everything was changing. Our friendship group was always going to be the most important thing for me, and I didn’t want him questioning that.
I knew Robert would understand why we had to tread carefully, but I decided not to tell him about Ben’s breakdown. Perhaps I should have done, then they could have had some awkward lad conversation and talked it all through, but I thought it would be cruel to talk about him behind his back. I just hoped I could balance everything enough to keep them both happy.
Obviously, that night in the cinema was a bit tricky to start with, but I wasn’t sure if that was because I kept looking for signs that Ben was uncomfortable. I thought he was at first – as he stood alongside us, waiting to buy tickets, he fixed his gaze on the surrounding posters of future films with an overly keen interest. I was sure he was doing it to avoid having to interact with us, but I couldn’t be sure.
I might have been trying to play it cool, but Robert clearly wanted us to act like a couple; he was extremely touchy-feely. He barely let go of me, continuously placing a hand around my waist or taking my hand in his. It was difficult, I didn’t want to just brush him off and leave him feeling rejected, that would have been a crap start to our relationship, but I didn’t want the whole thing to be thrust in Ben’s face either. I wanted it to feel normal.
‘I’ll get yours,’ Robert said as we got to the counter.
‘Oh …’
‘Thanks,’ joked Ben, managing a smile.