You and Everything After(56)

“Yes, I slept with my coach in high school. And yes, I slept with my teacher. Slept with the principal at our school, too. I get around—collect other girls’ husbands and boyfriends. I don’t know why they always fall for me…” I keep up the false, flippant voice as I talk. “Maybe their women just can’t keep them satisfied. I’m so good that after a man sleeps with me, he gives me anything I want. You like being first team?”

When I say this, I turn my head to the girl with jet-black hair, because she’s the one I want to hurt the most.

“What? No response for me? Are you afraid I’ll spread my legs and fuck my way into your position? I mean, why wouldn’t I, right? It’s what I do. I don’t earn anything myself. Those sprint times that are better than yours, my California scoring records, the goddamned trophy I hoisted up on my shoulders when our team won state—all lies. It’s really about the blowjobs I give behind closed doors—to recruiters, to whomever I need to, so I can get ahead. Because, yeah…that makes way more sense than the idea that maybe I’m just really fucking good, and maybe I could help your team win nationals, and maybe…just maybe…my skills are threatening to you,” I snap my head to the third girl, sitting in the back, her breath held this entire time. “Or you.” I revel a little inside when she makes a chirping noise, scooting back in fear. She’s afraid of me. Good.

“I underestimated you girls. You’re too smart for me. Guess I’ll just have to earn my way into the captain’s job by showing your asses up out on the field instead of fucking some fifty-year-old married man off campus. Damn, this way is going to be so much harder. Why’d you have to ruin my plan?”

I have left them speechless, each of their mouths opened, but unable to breathe. A year ago, I would have waited for them to leave, would have run home and cried in my closet, my whimpers muffled by my giant teddy bear, and then I would have fixed it all by putting out to some boy who didn’t love me, but who I could pretend did—at least for the night.

That was the old Cass. This Cass? She loves herself, or at least she’s working on it. She is more than her MS. And she has a boyfriend—who isn’t married, and isn’t her teacher, or just using her for a few hours and bragging rights.

And these bitches have just lost their starting positions on the team, because tomorrow I am going to humiliate them on that field. I don’t care if it kills me.

I slide away from them in my socks and sandals, my gear slung in my bag over my shoulder. I pop my gum once because my hands are both too full to give them the finger.

“See you ladies tomorrow. Hope you’re ready for me.” I bite down once and force a final smile before I turn and let the door slam behind me.

My chest is thumping wildly with adrenaline. This is the first time…perhaps ever…that I have stood my ground, stuck up for myself, squashed rumors before they got out of control. I feel like I could run a hundred more sprints, or climb a mountain. By the time I get to Ty, who is still waiting for me at the front of the field gate, I leap onto his lap and kiss him—completely forgetting all of the doubt that’s been keeping me awake the last two nights.

I’m amazing, and Ty is lucky to have me. And for a few moments, I honestly believe that’s true.





Chapter 16



Ty



“You’re pushing things kinda close, don’t you think?” I ask, watching her shove everything into one bag—her physics notes, her book for the exam, her cleats. I’m fighting every OCD bone in my body not to grab the bag from her and at least fold some of the crap she’s stuffed in there. “Awe, woman! You’re wrinkling your shorts.” I lose the fight and take the bag into my lap, doing my best to organize it.

“I know it’s going to be close, but I don’t really have a choice,” she says, tapping her foot while I do my best to organize this mess she’s thrown together. “I failed my test. I mean, like…blew it! This is my only chance to get a retake…just give it to me.”

She zips the bag shut, and hooks the straps over one shoulder.

“Okay, but just make sure you leave in time to get to the field for warm-ups,” I remind her. Why am I always the nag? Nagging Nate, nagging Cass—huh…I’m Mom.

“Yes, coach,” she teases, kissing my cheek as she walks by. “Oh, hey…can I borrow your watch so I can keep track of the time during my test?”

“Oh, uh…can’t you borrow Rowe’s or something? Mine’s so big and heavy,” I lie. That makes two, though this isn’t really a lie, it’s more of an omission. My watch is heavy, but that has nothing to do with my diversion tactic.