I am in the seven circles of hell. His look alone consumes my soul and makes me beg for more. He wants me and is determined to get me. I’m his obsession, and I’ve just become a slave to his infatuation... to the games he likes to play. The games he knows will have me surrendering to his will.
But that’s not the only problem. That’s not the only reason I am living in my own personal hell.
The year before I met my soon-to-be step-brother, Hunter... The year I made a decision that will ultimately end up destroying my very soul...
I lost my virginity to Hunter’s dad.
Warning: Contains scenes of emotional and physical abuse. Readers with sensitivity to such subjects are advised to proceed with caution.
“Daddy, please don’t leave me.” My face was wet from crying so much. My daddy was bleeding, and there was no one around to help me.
We had been driving in the car when a small tree came out of nowhere, smashed through the window, and went into my daddy’s chest. He was finding it hard to breathe, and I could see blood coming out of his mouth. I knew something was very wrong. Daddy was hurt.
He tried to say something to me, but all he did was choke. “Daddy, don’t... I need you. Please, Daddy... Please.”
He tried so hard to speak, but all he did was make funny noises. There was no one there. No one to help me. There was blood on my new birthday dress and all over my hands as I screamed for someone to help my daddy.
The only thing I saw was an empty road ahead. No cars had come by because everyone was indoors. It was too windy to go anywhere, but Daddy took me out so he could get me something special.
“Daddy, what do I do? Please tell me what to do. I’m scared, Daddy. I’m so scared.” I was crying harder and squeezing his hand. I didn’t want him to leave me. He couldn’t leave me.
All I could hear was the wind and my daddy’s coughing. I was so frightened. I needed someone to help my daddy. Why was no one here?
Suddenly, he started coughing really badly and yanked on my hand like he was desperate to speak. His eyes went wide like he had just seen a ghost... and then...
Silence...
As per usual, my mother was really pissing me off. If it wasn’t for the fact that I couldn’t afford to live anywhere else, I wouldn’t be here. My mum had control of the trust fund my dad left me when he died until I turned twenty-one. I couldn’t go anywhere until I had that in my hands.
There were over two more years to go. Two long, arduous fucking years of putting up with her accusing looks... the ones which told me everything. The looks which said it was all my fault that he was gone. I couldn’t stand her. She was like a never-ending thorn in my side. She was always out fucking God-only-knew-who and then bringing them back to our house. I had to just sit and listen to them. Some men stayed overnight, and they were the scum of the universe. The amount of times they would hit on me after they had just slept with my mum was too much for words. I mean, seriously? Fuck that shit. It made my skin crawl.
As sickening as it was, she was already at it again. Apparently, she met someone eight months ago. At least this one kept some distance from the house—so much so that she wanted me to meet him and his son tonight. She had a big announcement, she had said.
Fucking great.
Closing my eyes, I wandered back to two weeks ago, when I had met a man a couple of years older than I. I was at a bar and getting pissed with Mandy. Getting pissed with Mandy was a regular occurrence. She knew all about me and was the only solid in my life. I had two months to go until my nineteenth birthday. Normally, my dad’s death didn’t start hitting me until a month before the anniversary date, but this time it was happening two months early. I dreaded this time of year.
I wanted to be emotionally numb. I wanted to only feel pleasure. Feeling pleasure was good for me, especially when it involved a man going down on me or using his cock to pound me up against a wall.
I wasn’t a slut by any means. I didn’t sleep around at all. I only seemed to want to be with a man when it got near my birthday. I actually lost my virginity to a man when I turned eighteen. And when I say a “man,” I mean a man. I wasn’t sure how old he was, but I was pretty sure he was twice my age. I wanted someone who knew what he was doing. I didn’t want a fumbling young buffoon, who came the minute his dick was inside of me. I wanted someone with a solid amount of experience, and I wasn’t disappointed. The man who approached me at the bar on my birthday was staying at a well-known hotel about half an hour away from my town. Mandy told me that only the finest of men frequented there. She knew I wanted someone refined. Someone who would take care of me. Someone who knew what he was doing.