“You’ve had enough because I say you’ve had enough!” Luca picked me up like a rag doll and threw me over his shoulder. No one was surprised by this. It was definitely a regular occurrence in this house.
Just for an added show of authority Luca smacked my arse. I really didn’t want to yelp, but it was so shocking that I couldn’t help it. “You fucking arsehole!” I seethed.
Once in “our tower” as we seemed to now be calling it, Luca placed me down on the bed and towered above me. I had to snigger at that. He always wanted to assert his authority over me. Even now!
“Are you going to stop acting like a child and talk to me?”
I could have spat back, but I held my tongue. Instead I surprised him. “Who are you?” I figured it was about time we had this conversation.
“What do you mean? I’m Luca, the man you—”
“What, Luca? What? The man I’m fucking, ‘cos we seem to be doing very little else. You know everything about me, and yet I know diddly-squat about you.”
Clenching his fists, Luca bared his teeth. “You know we mean more to each other than that.”
Deciding I didn’t much like sitting on the bed with a towering lion hovering above me, I decided to stand. “Really? Don’t kid yourself. What do I know about you? Oh yes, you’re an Italian, hard-nosed, domineering little arsehole who likes piña colada’s and getting caught in the fucking rain!”
Getting up in my face, Luca locked my eyes with his. “What did he say to you? What did the fucker say to get you so angry? You mean everything to me. I thought you would know that by now. I keep telling you as much.”
I shook my head in exasperation. “That’s the thing. They’re just words, just goddamned fucking words. They don’t mean shit.”
“What do you want from me?”
“I want you to tell me the truth!”
Exasperated, Luca let go of my arms and paced the floor running his hands through his hair. Turning back to me, he stood firm like a bull about to charge.
“Okay. You want the truth? I’ll give you the goddamned truth. I fucking love you. Is that what you want to know? I can’t stop thinking about you and haven’t stopped thinking about you since the moment I saw that fucking picture. You’ve stolen my heart, and you’ve stolen my soul. I cannot breathe without you. I cannot live without you. Every time you’re not with me, it’s like I can’t function properly without you. I’m like a fish without water—a fire without its spark. I’m nothing unless I’m with you. Nothing unless I have you in my arms. You’re my missing piece in a symphony, my lantern in the dark. My world. My one and only. You complete me.”
Feeling the tears sting at his words, I walked away. I couldn’t look at him as I knew I would cave. “It’s not enough. I need something—anything. I need more.”
Grabbing my arms and pulling me to face him, Luca looked desperate. “What more can I give you that I haven’t already?”
I momentarily looked down at my feet. “It’s not about the gifts you buy or the number of orgasms you can give me. I need to know what’s in here.” I placed my hand on his heart. “And in here.” I moved my hands to his head.
Sighing in defeat, Luca dropped my arms and turned away. I stood, silently waiting. Every second that passed was like an agonising hour.
Shaking his head, Luca looked down towards the floor, sighing. He groaned, taking a few more deep breaths, and before I could even register it, he turned towards the door and left.
Shocked and bewildered, I sat down on the bed, wondering what the hell had just happened. How on earth could he tell me he loved me in one breath and in the other refuse to let me in? I didn’t know what on earth was going on, but I knew one thing was for certain. I wasn’t going to let this lie—not by a long shot. He would come back, and when he did, he would have some explaining to do.
Three days passed, and I still hadn’t heard from him. A part of me yearned for him, but a huge part of me was royally pissed off. He said he couldn’t live without me, but somehow, he had been managing very well for three days. He was like a walking, talking contradiction, and quite frankly, I had exhausted the many ways I thought we could move on from this. We couldn’t possibly move on. Not at this point. Not unless he was willing to reach out to me and tell me about his past. How could I possibly love someone who was not willing to give all to me? It just didn’t seem fair. Even absent, he was asserting his alpha status by knowing a damn sight more about me than I did about him. He had walked away from me for the time being, but he couldn’t run forever. He would either face me, or we would be done.