“Oh my God. I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. It was a long time ago now. The silly old fool that I am never got over it, though. I even lost our baby due to the grief. I couldn’t even keep that part of him with me. I felt like I had lost everything. I felt like there was nothing left for me to live for.”
I could feel my aunt’s pain oozing down the phone line. I really wished I could be there to comfort her and hold her hand. She was hurting, and I wanted to be able to support her.
“I tried to take my own life. As you know, it didn’t work, which is how I’m here to tell you the tale. I was taken to hospital after overdosing on pills, and I was given help to ease my pain. I suffered a lot back then, and to be honest, I still do even now. My sister—your mother—was not a lot of help. She shouted at me and said that I would spend an eternity in limbo for what I had done. She had no sympathy for my loss; she only had reprimands and lectures about what a failure I was—as a sister—to offer me. But then, you already know how she is.”
I laughed sarcastically. I knew all too well what my mother was like, and Trudy had always felt guilty for not getting me out of there sooner. It’s no wonder she never did, though. She’d had her own pain to deal with.
“I started playing poker as a way to escape. Nothing too fancy—just the odd wager here and there. It soon turned to Blackjack and Slots. Before I even realized it, I was spending over a thousand pounds each week on gambling alone. What started out as just a hobby became a habit and then it was my crutch. It helped take the pain away and mask what it was I was truly feeling. I had something else to worry about instead of constantly thinking about John or the baby we had lost.”
I didn’t realise tears were streaming down my face until she stopped talking. “I want to see you,” I sniffled.
“I’m getting ready to leave shortly. I’m going to finally get the help I need. Luca has been very nice; he set it all up for me. He’s paying for me to get help. I have to stay in a rehabilitation clinic for the next twelve weeks. It’s time, Clara. I need to do this, and, for the first part, I need to do it alone.”
I felt desperate. “But, I’m here. I can help you. Please, let me take you to the clinic.”
“No, it’s okay. I have a taxi coming to pick me up in fifteen minutes. I’ll be in touch in a couple of weeks. I will be allowed to call you by then. It’s just something I need to do. You have to understand.”
“Yes, of course I do. I just want you to be happy.”
“I know you do. You’ve worked so hard, and I’m so proud of what you’ve achieved. I know springing Luca on you like this was not the best idea in the world, but at least you can get the help you deserve from him.”
I huffed my annoyance. “I don’t need his help.”
“Yes, you do. I don’t want you to end up like me.” The stern severity in her words hit me like a ton of bricks. I was lost for words. “Luca is the owner of one of the casinos I used to frequent. He came by after I had racked up over six hundred thousand pounds worth of debt. I had heard of him, and I was obviously frightened when he came to visit. He was not at all what I had expected. He was charming, very polite, and seemed to genuinely want to help me. When he stumbled across your picture, I saw something in his eyes which I hadn’t seen in a very long time. It was the same glint I always saw in John’s eyes whenever he looked at me. He was looking at you like you were the only woman in the world who had ever existed. I knew then he was never going to let you go.”
“I don’t understand.” I didn’t understand. I was just a game to him. A simple challenge.
It was then that something caught my eye on the table. It was a newspaper article which read, “Two arrested on possible rape and drugs charges.”
“He started asking questions about you and who you were to me. That was when I told him about us and our little venture. He was impressed and wanted to offer me a way out. I took it because I knew he was capable, and I knew he was safe. He offered me help, and I agreed as long as he promised me that he would look after you. I didn’t think I needed to ask, but it made him smile to see that I had been so protective of you. I told him a lot about you, and he was enthralled by it all. He asked question after question about you until I thought my head would spin. He was like a man possessed—a man instantly in love.”
One part of me was listening to Trudy, but the another part had me reaching for this newspaper article. I had to read more. “You can’t fall in love with someone you’ve never met before.”