I can’t stop grinning. ‘Oh Stella, I’m so happy you’ve moved on. You can’t imagine how bad I felt about Zane and me.’
She winks. ‘Yes, I realized you must have been really sorry: the bathroom never looked so clean during that period.’
I look shamefaced. ‘So you forgive me?’
She reaches out and grasps my hand. ‘There’s nothing to forgive, babe. It’s not like you broke up my happy meal, or anything. I was so miserable when I thought I was in love. Now when I look back I only see how completely stupid it all was. Why would anyone do that to themselves unless they were masochistic? And everybody knows I’m not. I love myself.’
‘I am actually really proud of you. I like this new and shiny Stella,’ I say smiling happily at her. In truth I am very relieved and impressed by how fast she has turned the corner on her infatuation.
She beams back. ‘Well, join the club. I’m really proud of myself too. Now, enough about me. How big is Zane, really? Every queen needs a king size and I’m not talking about no bed.’
I laugh.
‘Give me details, woman,’ she demands.
‘OK, are you ready for this?’
‘Shoot.’
‘I got to practice what we learned at the blowjob course.’
Her jaw drops. ‘You swallowed?’ she splutters.
I nod calmly.
She slaps her thigh. ‘What happened to discreetly spitting while pretending to swallow?’
I shrug. ‘I couldn’t help it. It was rather delicious.’
She gasps. ‘Never. You fucking liar. Spunk is not delicious.’
I grin. ‘Actually it was.’
‘Forget it. Nobody, not even you, is ever going to convince me that sperm is delicious.’
I chuckle at Stella’s expression. ‘I think I wanted to because I’m so crazy about him.’
Stella leans forward, fascinated. ‘Yeah?’
‘Yeah,’ I say.
‘Wow! You’re really falling for him, aren’t you?’
‘I’m not falling for him. I think I’ve already fallen.’
Stella is staring at me in astonishment. I know now would be a good time to drop the bombshell about Daisy. I’ve never been any good at keeping secrets, and anyway, I want her to know. Before Zane came into our lives we always told each other everything and I don’t want that to change. However, I already know exactly how she will react and I feel a little nervous flutter in my stomach.
‘I want to tell you something, but I don’t want to you overreact,’ I tell her.
‘Me overreact. When have I ever overreacted?’
I raise my eyebrows and look at her with a come-on-it’s-me-you’re-talking-to expression.
‘Don’t worry I won’t.’
I look at her warningly.
‘All right. All right. I promise not to. Go on, spit it out.’
‘OK, remember that you have promised. No hysterics.’
‘Go on,’ she urges impatiently.
I take a deep breath and plunge in. ‘Zane is the one who kidnapped Daisy.’
‘What?’ she explodes so loudly a lot of heads turn.
I look around us and notice that even Noah has turned to watch us. ‘Remember you promised,’ I hiss at her.
She picks up her glass of champagne, drains it dry and carefully puts the empty glass back down. ‘Whoa, Dahlia. You’re not surely going to hold me to my promise. This is so mind-blowing. How can you sit there and tell me something like this so calmly? What is wrong with you? I’m fucking freaking out here.’
‘I reacted the same way when I first found out, but I’ve had time to assimilate.’
‘Time to assimilate? Fuck! When did you find out?’
‘Last night.’
‘Jesus, Dahlia am I going crazy, or are you still with him?’
I pick up the bottle of champagne and fill Stella’s glass. ‘You’re not going crazy and I’m still with him.’
‘Oh my God. Oh my God! I don’t believe this. While I was not watching you’ve gone and morphed into one of these weird women who thinks it’s OK to write romantic letters to serial killers on death row, haven’t you?’
‘Stop being so dramatic.’
‘Dramatic? If I can’t be dramatic now, when the hell am I ever going to be dramatic?’ she demands intensely.
I sigh. ‘Olga explained it all to me.’
Stella’s eyes become dinner plates. ‘Olga? She’s the fucking cook! How on earth did she explain it all away?’
‘I don’t know. She made sense.’
‘He kidnapped your sister, Dahlia!’
‘Do you want to calm down and listen, or do you just want to rant for the next hour?’