"You can't blame yourself. Everyone on the island knows how rough the water can be on that side."
"I was never one to do as I was told, but I did that day. The one time I should have rebelled and stayed."
"And drowned yourself? You can't think that."
He set her aside and rose. "I'm hungry. Are you coming down with me?"
She shifted on the love seat, pulling her skirt down and smoothing it, watching him settle his sunglasses into place and button his shirt, firmly locking her out.
Her heart continued to ache. She knew all about guilt and grief, regret and self-loathing. What she didn't know was how to reach for someone trapped in that same bubble and bring him out of it.
"Ophelia texted a while ago. I'm going to have a quick face call with her, then I'll come down. I promised your sister I would send her a few pictures from the grounds. Do you want to walk with me?"
"Find me in the dining room." He closed his cuffs and left.
"Stavros..." Calli was speechless as she stared into the mirror, throat closing above the heavy, cool lump that sat just below her collarbone.
She couldn't even make herself reach for the matching earrings. The prenup had outlined his responsibility for providing a suitable wardrobe and accessories, but she had never expected it to include a square-cut yellow sapphire surrounded by diamonds, suspended from two ropes of flat-linked, twisted gold.
He had put it on her himself, after zipping her gown-which was the most form-fitting she'd ever worn. Burnt red satin plunged from spaghetti straps to show off her cleavage, forming a perfect frame for the necklace. Then the gown hugged her waist and hips, covering her backside like a coat of paint before falling away in a flare of sparkle-dusted silk.
He eyed her, standing behind her reflection. "It suits you. Brings out your eyes."
"It's making them fall out of my head! What do you mean it's not on loan?"
"Well, it's not stolen, if that's what you're implying. I was shopping for an anniversary gift for Sebastien and Monika when I saw it. I wanted you to have it."
Many moons ago, she had dreamed of being whisked into a rich boy's world, but that aspiration had long died, replaced with a simple one where she knew her son and he knew her. For the first time in a long time, she wistfully yearned to be part of a man's life, but not for this. She wanted so much more than a cut stone from this man. Things she couldn't bring herself to ask for.
He'd been remote all day. She had tried to respect his desire to retreat emotionally. She did the same all the time, so she didn't try to get past his shuttered expression, had only asked him whether he wanted to take this path or that.
It had been a gorgeous day. From across the grounds, the sounds of horse hooves and cheering carried from the trials they were conducting. Where they walked, the air was filled with the sounds of nature. Birds and bees. A soft breeze caressed her skin and the air smelled sweet and fresh.
They happened across a stone bridge that crossed a brook and she paused to take several photos of the sun slanting through the trees onto the water.
When she lowered her camera, Stavros turned her into his arms. He didn't say anything, only held her close so her ear was pressed to the steady thump of his heart while the run of water moving under the bridge sounded below.
She hugged his waist, offering the comfort she wished she could have given him earlier. Her insides trembled like the leaves quivering and whispering around them. When he kissed her and took her hand, tugging her along in silence, her heart was so loose in her chest she could hardly walk.
It made this gift all the more surprising, yet profound, completely unraveling her.
She made herself turn and press her mouth to his. "I'm overwhelmed. It's beautiful. Thank you."
They didn't speak about his father or anything else very serious for the rest of the night. They made their way out to the marquee that had been set with round tables, white cloths, crystal and china, then decorated with candles and roses.
It was pure magic and Sebastien and Monika were clearly ecstatic in their marriage. They started the dancing, then Antonio and Sadie joined in, making a fetching couple as Sadie's daring black-and-white gown mirrored the crisp tuxedo her husband wore. What must it be like to be so in love? Calli wondered.
Despite how in sync they seemed, however, Calli thought there was a flash of conflict as Sadie said something and Antonio seemed to stiffen.
Before she could decipher it, Cecily came alongside her. She wore a gold affair that made her look like a gilded angel.
"You look stunning," Calli told her.
"So do you," Cecily said, eye catching on the pendant. "Wow. That's gorgeous."
"Oh, um, Stavros gave it to me," Calli murmured, self-conscious as Cecily's expression softened.
"He loves you," she said, and there might have been a glint of despair or longing in her eyes, but her lashes swept down, disguising her thoughts.
Calli bit back protesting that Stavros didn't love her at all and reassured instead, "Your fiancé is obviously crazy about you."
"Because of this afternoon?" Cecily made a face and darkened with a small blush. "That wasn't...what it looked like."
It had looked like Alejandro had thrown her over his shoulder and carried her from the horse trials to their room to make love. What else could it be?
The men joined them at that point and they all moved onto the dance floor, at which point Sadie abruptly left.
"Oh. Something to do with her son, do you think?" Calli asked, watching her with concern.
Monika followed Sadie while Antonio moved off the dance floor and into conversation with Sebastien.
"They'll let us know if it's an emergency," Stavros said, sharp gaze on his friend.
A short while later, Sebastien assured them everything was fine, that the couple had simply gone into the house.
It became a night to remember and Calli knew she always would. She would look back with nostalgia in her golden years to this time when she had been young and married far out of her league, invited to a party she had no business attending, dancing like Cinderella with the most handsome man at the ball.
The man she loved.
"How's your head this morning? Do you need anything?" she asked as they returned to their room after breakfast. He had disappeared in the middle of the night, leaving her to wake alone, telling her he hadn't been able to sleep and wound up having a beer with Alejandro.
She wondered if he had been regretting being so candid with her about his father, but this morning he was his regular self.
"I'm fine. Why? Are you suffering? You only had a couple of glasses of Champagne last night."
"I only asked because I was just about to get my pill and-" It struck her that she didn't remember taking yesterday's. She frowned and hurried into the bathroom to find her makeup bag, quickly spilling out the eye drops she used for a pollen allergy, and the bottle of over-the-counter pain relievers, before pulling out her blister pack of birth control.
Then she said a word she never used.
Stavros came to the door. "What's wrong?"
"I always wait until after breakfast." She was shaking, she was so shocked by what she was seeing. "I have it in my head that medication is better on a full stomach. But when I came back up here yesterday morning..." They had talked and she'd been consumed by what he had told her about his father. She had completely forgotten to take her pill and had carried on with the day.
"It's just one," he said as he looked at the dates on the packet. "That's not usually an issue."
"Except..." She swallowed, feeling nauseous. "Before we left New York, I popped out my pill and left it by the sink, then packed this and went down for breakfast. We ran out to catch the flight right after. I honestly don't remember if I went back and took it."
She was almost certain she hadn't. Damn it!
When they had first discussed birth control, Stavros had suggested something like a patch or one of those capsules under the skin. She had never used anything before so she had wanted something temporary, to see how her body responded.
Realizing she had missed two made her heart plummet through the earth and into the void of space on the other side.
"We've been having unprotected sex." Her voice trembled and she hardly recognized herself in the mirror. She was white as a sheet.
"We'll get a morning-after pill."
"That's for the morning after. It's been three days, Stavros." She slapped the little packet down, but it made only a tinny rattle of a noise, nothing resounding enough for the magnitude of this mistake. Her world, already upside down, began to rend and tear at the seams. "What if I'm pregnant?"
His pupils seemed to explode, turning his eyes midnight black.
"Don't you dare say I did this on purpose," she warned through lips that started to buzz. Her throat burned. "Don't you dare."