He leaned back against the side of his car and held her while she let it out.
“I was letting it go, I was. I had the last name on the back of a photo and a postmark. I didn’t even know if that would be enough. Then when he gave me the address, I thought, no, put it behind you. Then I couldn’t, not without seeing her. Just to make sure she’s okay, that she’s there, that they didn’t change their mind.” She sniffed, lifted her face, and his heart turned over at her effort to pull herself back together. “I just want to see her.”
“Okay,” he said, because what else could he do? “Then that’s what we’ll do. We’ll see her.” He had no idea how this was going to go, how it could possibly go well, but he knew she needed it. “I’ll drive you.”
Mia stared at him for a minute, maybe thinking she would rather go alone or that she didn’t trust him enough to follow through. He joined their hands, and when she looked up, he gave hers a squeeze. “I’m with you.”
Blinking back more tears, she bit her lip and got in.
* * *
IT WAS A TWENTY-MINUTE drive under a steel-gray sky. Without a word, Nick pulled the car to the side of the street and stopped behind a small white hatchback. He cut the engine and put the windows down. She’d never been to Texas in December. Even with overcast skies, the air was warm and humid.
Several cars sat along the street and on white gravel driveways. Wild gardens grew in front and on the sides. Tall plants with dead ends that had once bloomed flowers and hadn’t been cut back yet.
“That’s it,” he said, pointing to her right and one house down.
The house was covered in clean white siding and had a dark-green awning. Red-brick steps led to a screened-in porch, and she could just make out the shape of someone. She heard a woman’s voice then a child’s, repeating the same unintelligible sounds. Maybe singing.
She didn’t realize Nick was getting out until she heard his door close. He walked around the hood and opened her door. Her heart pounded, and she couldn’t get her feet to move. Nick knelt in her open doorway. She met his gaze briefly, saw his brown eyes narrow as he studied her. He didn’t say anything, but she heard him just the same.
I’m here. I’m with you.
And thank God he was with her.
She fumbled to unlatch her seatbelt then took Nick’s outstretched hand. He offered himself and his strength, and she took both. Together, they walked over the cracked sidewalk where weeds fought for life, found an opportunity, and took it.
The screen door opened, and a woman and child moved into the yard with a big plastic ball. She stood the little girl on the grass and stood behind her.
Savannah. Walking.
She kicked the ball, barely grazing the side, and followed happily. The ball rolled toward Mia, and she bent to pick it up. She took two steps forward and held out the ball, but instead of taking it, Savannah turned and toddled quickly to the woman. Her mother.
“Can I help you?” the woman asked, her voice clipped, protective.
Savannah held onto the woman’s legs, peeked through. Mia stared, her feet rooted to the spot. Like the weeds, she shouldn’t be here.
Then there was recognition in the woman’s eyes. “Oh.” A breath whooshed out. “It’s you, isn’t it?”
“Yes,” Nick answered, because Mia couldn’t speak. She could barely breathe. It was Savannah, her Savannah, right here, right in front of her.
The woman picked her up and held her close, her expression a little sorry but possessive. “Do you, um… want to come inside?”
Mia’s hands shook. Everything inside her was shaking. Big cornflower-blue eyes stared blankly back at her. There was no recognition. Not even a smile.
“She doesn’t remember me,” Mia whispered to no one. One tear slid silently down her cheek.
“No, thank you,” Nick answered for her as his arm came around her shoulders, holding her together. Very nearly holding her up. “I don’t think so. She just, we just…”
“Wanted to see her.” The young woman tried to smile, but it wavered, and she held the baby closer. “I understand. I’m sorry. I wanted to say that. That I’m really sorry, and… thank you. I’m sorry I didn’t send more pictures. My phone broke, and then I… I just didn’t know if I should or…”
Mia shook her head slowly. “It’s okay.” She took a hesitant step forward, then another, until she was close enough to reach out and touch her. She stroked Savannah’s blond curls that were long enough to touch her shoulders now. The little girl stared wide eyed, then curled herself closer into the woman’s chest. “Mama.”