He’d nursed it until his fury was a living, breathing thing, so much a part of him he was afraid of what might happen if he let it go. For too long it had been the only thing to keep him from crumpling into a pile of dust.
The flowers slid onto their side and the cellophane flapped in the breeze. All this time, he thought he’d been healing, keeping himself contained and controlled. But he hadn’t been. Not until Hannah. The very one he’d feared would drag him back to a time when he most hated himself had slowly pulled him into her light.
And he wanted to stay there.
—
Hannah held the phone against her ear as she wiped off the counter and talked to Mia on the other end. She’d called to check in, since they hadn’t gotten a chance to talk yesterday. “How are things with Stephen?” Mia asked.
Ah. And now she figured they were getting to the real reason for the call. But she didn’t mind. It reminded her of a time long ago, when Mia had been more like a big sister. “Good. He actually left a little while ago, but he’s coming back with dinner.” He had an international conference call and was bringing takeout after. She peeked at the brownies in the oven and smiled, thinking how Stephen liked to describe the wicked things they could do with chocolate.
“I haven’t talked to you alone since your trip.” Mia paused and Hannah could practically feel the give-me-details raised eyebrow.
“It was good.”
“And?”
“And it was really good. We…well…you know.”
“Yes. I know. I would ask how that went, but by the sound of your voice and the look on your face yesterday, I take it it was good.”
“Better than good.” Hannah pulled the brownies from the oven. She liked them slightly gooey in the center. So did Stephen. Whom she’d expected by now. She brushed the curtains aside and realized there’d been a long pause. “Mia?”
“That’s wonderful, Hannah. Really. I’m so happy for you. Proud of you.”
“But?”
“We’re friends, aren’t we? In addition to being patient, doctor?”
“Of course.”
“Okay. I’m speaking as a friend here, since you never had a mother to tell you these things. Not that I’m the only person you could talk to, but…I just want to say…it’s a big step, and it’s all moved pretty fast. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with that, but this is your first relationship.”
First man she’d kissed. First man to see her scars. First man she’d slept with. Lots of firsts. And onlys. “And girls tend to fall in love with their first. I know.” It was hard to tell if this new pain in her chest was love or her fear that Stephen might not love her back.
“I’m not saying any of it’s wrong. I just don’t want to see you get hurt.”
Neither did she. She’d seen Mia and Stephen talking yesterday, hadn’t thought anything of it. Now she did. “Do you think I will? Did Stephen say something to you?”
“Nothing, honey. Just…be careful.”
Hannah checked out the window again and an odd light flickered through the trees. She felt a surge of relief at seeing Stephen’s headlights and stepped outside, thinking to end the call. The light danced. “What the— Oh my, God. The barn. It’s on fire.”
Chapter 39
Hannah cut off Mia’s warnings, telling her to call 911, then barely got her car in park before jumping out and sprinting toward the barn. One thing on her mind. Get the horses. The front was an impassable wall of flames. She changed course to check the back.
Smoke poured through every crack and seam as she rounded the corner, but it wasn’t as bad here. She undid the latch, slid back the wide door, and was hit with a staggering blast of heat. The blaze crackled, the horses screamed and battered against the stalls holding them prisoner.
“How many?”
It was Lexie, shouting right beside her, barely audible over the roaring of burning wood.
How many in the barn? She didn’t know, couldn’t think. Nothing to do but go stall to stall. “I’ll do this side,” she shouted, and stepped into hell.
Hannah opened the first door she came to on her left, freeing Big Ben, who instinctively ran from the danger.
She moved to the next one, squinting toward the front of the barn. Oh, God. It was a wall of flames moving toward her. They licked up the walls around the office, to the ceiling and across the beams. A destructive force, pushing choking smoke and searing heat ahead of it.
The hungry flames were devouring everything in their path. The feed room across from the office was already engulfed. Once it got past there, it would reach the horses in the first stalls.