Nick laid his arm on the back of the swing. “So, how was your weekend? You were hard to catch up with.”
“It was good.”
“What’s her name?”
“Whose?”
“The friend you were shopping with.”
The swing squeaked back and forth in the quiet while he waited.
“Must be a good friend to spend all day. Same friend you went to dinner with last week?”
More waiting, until the breath she’d been holding huffed out. “Okay. Fine. You got me. Damn, they must really love you in interrogation.”
Nick didn’t laugh. “Who were you with? Though I’ve got a pretty good idea since you didn’t tell me.”
“He apologized.”
“I know. I was there.”
“Then he brought his niece out to ride. I’d offered and—”
“He used his niece?” Nick made a disgusted sound. “Nice.”
“He didn’t use her. His sister-in-law called him and asked for a ride.”
“And you’re defending him. What time did you get home?”
“Do I have a curfew?”
“Hannah—”
“Sorry. I’m sorry.” Nick worried when she didn’t call, and in his line of work he didn’t need his thoughts and attention divided. “We walked around, went to dinner after a movie, then I came home. Alone. I met him there, or he met me. I didn’t even think he’d show.”
“Of course he’d show. He’d have to be a complete idiot to—” He sighed long and hard. “Never mind. Just…God, you’re twenty-six, but this is hard. I don’t trust him. I don’t know him.”
“Well, I could always date someone you do know. Another agent? Someone at Zach’s firehouse?”
“Over my dead body.”
She smiled at his emphatic answer. “Don’t worry. Anyone you guys know would rather shoot themselves in the ass than make a move on me.” She pulled her feet up under her. “I know it’s hard. It’s hard for me too, but…I need to try, you know?” Nick didn’t answer, but she knew he got it, even if he didn’t like it. “You know, I don’t remember a time when you were just a big brother. What did you think when Mom told you she was pregnant?”
“Shit. I pretty much tried not to think about it. We all did. We were teenage boys and it was…shocking. The thought of Mom and Dad…I couldn’t look her in the eye for a week.”
She heard the smile in his voice and she was glad for it. He didn’t smile enough. They’d had great parents. Her brothers had loved them and missed them in a way she couldn’t.
Nick chuckled under his breath.
“What?”
“Just thinking how she used to make us change your diaper. Said it would make us better fathers. Dad said it would teach us to keep it in our pants. Damn, we had some good fights over who got stuck watching you.”
“Then you all got stuck.”
The steady motion of the swing hitched. “I didn’t mean it like that, Han. And I didn’t mind so much then. None of us did.”
“I know.” And she did. He’d never made her feel like a burden.
He gave her shoulder a squeeze. “Plus, you were housebroken by then.”
“Remember how you all used to monster-proof my room? You were the dragon slayer.”
“Yep. Dallas was the cootie catcher. Luke was the laser.”
“And what was Zach?”
“The zapper.”
“Yeah. That’s right.” She rested her head against his shoulder. Her big, strong brothers, who she’d always known would protect her.
She hadn’t known back then that people were the worst monsters.
—
Hannah whistled and waited for Winnie to lope over to the pasture fence as the roar of Lexie’s motorcycle dwindled into the distance. Her last student had left hours ago, all chores were done. Winnie chuffed and snorted. Hannah dug in her pocket for a sugar cube and held out two closed fists beneath Winnie’s muzzle, playing their guess-which-hand game.
It had only been a few days since she’d seen Stephen, but still…it bothered her that she hadn’t talked to him. Of course he didn’t have her number, her own choice. But she couldn’t help wondering…would he have called her if he did have it? Did men call women after a date? If they were dating? How many dates meant you were dating?
He wasn’t a boy looking for a girlfriend. He was a man, looking for…she had no idea. “What do you think, Winnie? You’re a girl. What would a man like that be looking for?” Physically, she wasn’t even sure what she had to offer. She had no idea when she’d be ready. If she’d ever be ready. She’d just barely crossed the hurdle of dating, kissing. But she wanted to kiss him again.