His whole body was rigid with tension. ‘So that’s that, then?’
‘It would seem so.’
Why didn’t he argue with her, dammit? Tell her he loved her madly. Tell her everything he was thinking and feeling? But he didn’t.
The tears were going to come at any moment. If he didn’t leave soon she’d make an utter fool of herself.
He stood for a long moment just staring at her, his eyes tormented, and for a wild moment she thought he was going to kiss her. But then his hands clenched into fists and he walked away from her, wrenching open the front door and slamming it behind him.
CHAPTER NINE
THE next week was a nightmare.
Every time Ally turned round she seemed to fall over Sean, her only consolation being that he seemed to look as drawn and strained as she felt. She couldn’t sleep, she didn’t eat and then, to cap it all, she went down with a stomach bug that seemed to be affecting most of Cumbria.
On the third day she felt slightly better and dragged herself into work, ignoring the feeling of nausea that gnawed away in her stomach. She hadn’t actually vomited for two days so she should be fine to work. Anyway, one of the other partners was off with the same thing so she really needed to be there, helping.
Will didn’t think so. ‘It’s hardly a good advertisement for the practice if the doctors look as though they’re at death’s door. Go back to bed.’
Ally shook her head. ‘I’m fine now. I just feel a bit feeble.’ And exhausted. Totally drained. Like a puppet with its strings cut. But if she sat down she’d be OK.
Will was watching her closely. ‘This is more than a stomach bug.’
‘Don’t be ridiculous.’ Ally avoided his searching gaze and sorted out her desk. ‘Everyone’s got it.’
‘Agreed—but it lasts twenty-four hours and then they’re as right as rain.’
Ally rummaged in her drawer. ‘I’m as right as rain.’
‘It’s Sean, isn’t it?’
Her hand stilled and she gritted her teeth. She wasn’t going to break down. Not here, with a surgery to run.
‘I’m fine, Will.’
There was a moment’s silence. ‘Well, I’m really sorry, and if there’s anything I can do just ask.’
The kindness in his voice brought tears to the surface. ‘Thanks, Will.’
Fortunately Will had the wisdom to leave her alone then, giving her time to pull herself together before surgery. But as she buzzed for the first patient, something he’d said nagged in her brain. The stomach bug only lasted for twenty-four hours— so why was she still feeling sick?
She went through surgery on automatic, looking in ears and throats, listening to chests, writing prescriptions for antibiotics and seeing more people with the stomach bug, and as her last patient shut the door behind her she reached for the calendar, her hands shaking.
Carefully she counted the days, then checked again and closed her eyes. Dear God, her period was late and in all the stress she hadn’t even noticed. How could she not have noticed? She’d been due the night she and Sean had made love, which was why she’d thought she’d been safe. For a moment she sat and stared at the calendar, totally numb, and then a flame of excitement sparked inside her.
A baby. Sean’s baby.
She put the calendar down on her desk and stared out of the window at the mountains, a smile starting on her face. What was the matter with her? She should have been feeling horrified! She was expecting a baby by a man who didn’t want children or commitment. So why was she smiling?
She placed a hand over her abdomen in an instinctively protective gesture. Because it was part of Sean. Part of her love for him. There was no question of her not keeping it. The only question was what to do about Sean…
Her smile faded. He didn’t ever want children, he’d made that clear enough, and he didn’t want her either—not long term, at least. As she stared out of the window she saw that it had started to snow heavily and suddenly she felt more peaceful. She’d survive. Of course she would. And she wouldn’t tell Sean about the baby. What was the point? He didn’t want her and he’d made it clear that he didn’t want a child. She’d manage with the help of her family and friends. After all, she’d managed with Charlie…
* * *
It snowed heavily for another three days and most of Cumbria was paralysed.
‘Nothing’s moving on the roads, but the patients still seem to manage to turn up for surgery,’ Helen grumbled, checking the appointments to try and squeeze in another extra.
Ally gave her a wan smile. ‘I expect they’re bored so they want to come and see us.’