Worth the Risk(24)

‘On the contrary, it’s extremely responsible.’ His gaze clashed with hers and his mouth was a grim line, all traces of humour gone. ‘Far more so than having children without any thought for their future. When my relationships end no one gets hurt.’

Was he kidding? Ally was willing to bet he’d left a trail of broken hearts around the country. Adult ones, maybe, but still. ‘But don’t you ever have dreams of a family of your own?’

‘No, I don’t.’ He gave a short laugh, his expression grim. ‘I gave up believing in fairy tales when I was still in nappies. I was determined never to be responsible for a child’s unhappiness.’

She stared at him defensively. ‘Charlie isn’t unhappy.’

‘I wasn’t talking about Charlie.’ He stared out of the window into the darkness, his expression unreadable. ‘Charlie’s obviously one of the lucky ones, but I know plenty of children who aren’t so lucky.’

‘But don’t you ever want children of your own?’

‘No.’ Sean’s eyes were shuttered. ‘I don’t.’

Ally stared at him and wondered what had happened in his life to bring him to that decision. Looking at his taut profile, she felt a surge of sadness which she quickly dismissed. Why feel sad that a man she hardly knew didn’t want children? So what? Why should that affect her? Her eyes rested on his hard jaw and lifted to his eyes, and for some unfathomable reason the bleak look she saw there made her want to hug him. Hug him? She must be going mad. She shook herself mentally and pulled a can of chopped tomatoes out of the cupboard. Anything to keep her hands busy so that she didn’t do something stupid.

‘Anyway, talking of relationships…’ The smile was back, along with a wicked glint in his eye that she didn’t trust an inch. ‘What are we going to do about the chemistry between us?’

‘Chemistry?’ Her heart gave a jump and she moved quickly, putting the table between them as protection as he walked purposefully towards her. ‘Don’t kid yourself! I don’t think exchanging arguments and insults can really be called chemistry.’

‘Then why are you hiding behind a table?’ Those dark eyes teased her as he moved closer. ‘Who is it you don’t trust? Yourself or me?’

Ally took a deep breath and gripped the back of a chair. ‘Look, Sean, you’ve just said you avoid relationships, so—’

He grinned. ‘Don’t twist my words. I may avoid marriage and children, but I’m totally in favour of relationships.’

With her? He had to be joking! She wasn’t that stupid…

‘Well, I’m not.’ How come her voice sounded so steady? ‘It’s not fair on Charlie.’

He raised an eyebrow in an expression of disbelief. ‘You’re expecting me to believe that you’ve lived like a nun since she was born?’

She almost laughed. He didn’t know the half of it!

‘Believe what you like, but leave me alone, Sean.’ She looked away from him. ‘It wouldn’t work.’

Strong fingers grasped her chin and forced her to look at him. ‘Give me one good reason.’

‘I already have. Charlie.’

He stared at her for a long moment and then his hand dropped and he frowned. ‘You’re serious? You don’t date men because of your daughter?’

Ally turned away and stirred the Bolognese sauce. ‘Whatever you may think about the mistakes I made in Charlie’s past, I intend to make sure there aren’t any more in the future.’

‘And I’d be a mistake?’

‘Oh, yes. A huge mistake.’ She wasn’t the sort of person he obviously thought she was. The truth was she’d never had a fling with anyone before in her life. Never. She was one of those idiots who still believed in fairy tales and Father Christmas, and one special love that lasted for ever. Sean didn’t. They were as different as chalk and cheese, and to pretend otherwise would lead to nothing but disaster. He might be attractive but he was also dangerous. Dangerous because he’d made it clear that he didn’t want commitment, but for the first time in her life she was sorely tempted to put her principles to one side and take whatever was on offer.

But it wasn’t going to happen, she told herself firmly. No matter how many times those dark eyes captured hers or that smile turned her insides to a pool of jelly. It wasn’t going to happen. It wasn’t fair on Charlie.

For all his easy charm Sean was too cool and detached for her. He obviously avoided any real intimacy. The sort of man who wouldn’t think twice about having a brief affair and then moving on. He’d made that perfectly plain and chemistry or no chemistry she wasn’t fool enough to think she’d be the one to change him.