Worth It All(65)

A strange emptiness settled in Paige’s stomach. She didn’t think too much about having more children, but she’d like to. In her ideal life, living in her ideal house with the picket fence, she’d have two, maybe three. She smiled, thinking what a good big sister Casey would make.

Did Jake want that? She froze with the last spoon in her hand. Why did it hinge on Jake?





Chapter 22


Feeding all the kids first was an event and the noise rose to new decibels, but the older kids helped. Soon it was the adults’ turn and Jake stayed right with her, guiding her along the buffet Hannah had set out before them.

“I told you it was a lot of people,” he whispered into her ear. “And this isn’t even all of them.”

“It’s perfect.” It seemed everyone was talking at once, but no one had trouble hearing the person they were supposed to be listening to. Plates were filled, drinks were poured, and the youngest kids were set up in the kitchen with some older ones to supervise.

They carried their plates from the kitchen and sat around the great room wherever they could find a seat. Kids went in and out, asking for more and relaying minor transgressions. There was no way to tell who belonged to whom, and it didn’t seem to matter.

They ate and talked, and it was so much like a party it was hard to believe it was all family. One big family and then lots of little families inside it. She tried to keep up, just so she could remember who was who, but it was like playing how many triangles do you see inside the big triangle.

Families. Love. Couples.

She shouldn’t have worried about being uncomfortable the way they all worked to include her, to draw her into their circle. They ate, got seconds, and now reclined, letting their food settle while the frozen ice cream dessert softened.

“It’s always about you,” Andrew was saying to Tony.

“As it should be,” Tony said with a laugh. “I’m number one.”

“Which makes you the oldest,” Sarah said. “Might not want to brag about that too much. I think I saw a gray hair.”

“What it makes me is wisest.”

“Not,” said the woman beside him.

“Remember that time at Disney World?” Lizzie chimed in. “When we were all waiting like good little children, and Tony and Matt were off riding rides?”

Paige enjoyed the back-and-forth. She watched the faces, the smiles and loving looks. Especially from Jake’s parents, who seemed amused at their grown children still acting like kids. Even as they cut each other down, you could feel the love.

Matt shrugged. “We lost track of time.”

“Right. And we lost an hour of park time while Mom thought you’d been kidnapped and the park police were called out.”

“It wasn’t that bad,” Tony said, looking at her. “We were maybe fifteen minutes late.”

“Ten,” Matt said and laughed at his grumbling siblings, then caught the balled-up napkin his mom threw him.

Paige laughed too, but noticed Jake didn’t. He’d been quiet through all the rehashing of childhood. “Where was Jake?”

“Probably sacked out in his stroller. Or back at the hotel with Grandma,” Lizzie answered.

Right. Because he’d still been in a crib during most of their trips down memory lane. “You should see what Jake’s built in California. He’s a genius, you know.” The chatter quieted, eyes turned her way. “People come from all over the country, the world even. Did he tell you about the patents he’s sold?” she went on, because there were times her mouth just wouldn’t stop. This was one of those times. She took a breath when Jake’s fingers curled warmly around the back of her neck.

“We should plan a trip,” his dad said. “I’d like to see the place.”

Matt nodded, his other brothers and his dad added praise. Their faces were full of love and pride, and she realized too late she didn’t need to champion him. But she wanted to.

“He was always a smart boy, and such a beautiful baby,” his mother said, gazing at him with love.

“Especially in my dance outfits,” Lizzie added. “Really cute.”

He rolled his eyes at his sister. “I was two.”

“You were four,” Lizzie corrected.

Things deteriorated from there and several conversations broke out as they talked over each other. Jake was still quiet, but he smiled. It was the best family gathering she’d ever been to. The only family gathering she’d ever been to. She and her mom didn’t exactly count as a gathering.

Sometimes at Christmas, Jenny would be there with her own mom, maybe her stepdad. There were other people too, but never the same people twice. There were no shared memories except the ones she had with Jenny.