Worth It All(33)

Simon had texted Jake, letting them know he and Jenny were staying for a band and he would bring her home. Casey slept soundly in the backseat, lips slightly parted, a bit of blue cotton candy clung to her hair. The purple bear had dropped to the floor at her feet. Even with no buffers the silence wasn’t awkward. It was comfortable, companionable.

Thirty minutes later, the tires of his SUV crunched over weeds and gravel before coming to a stop off to the side. He was already opening the door next to Casey when she got there, and he waited as Paige unbuckled her and gently lifted her out of her seat. Jake grabbed the booster and all the day’s loot and followed her inside.

“Anywhere’s fine,” she whispered, leaving him in the kitchen. She tucked Casey in, sticky hair and all, then closed her bedroom door all but a crack.

Jake was leaning against the counter when she returned, his long legs out in front of him crossed at the ankle. Now what? It’d been a long time since she’d been alone with a man. No, not a man. She had zero experience with a man. She’d never even kissed anyone old enough to buy alcohol.

“Do you want something to drink?” She opened the refrigerator, acutely aware of his body behind hers barely two feet away. “I have milk, orange juice, or water.”

“Water’s good.”

She got two glasses, some ice, and filled them at the sink.

“Thanks.” He took the glass she offered.

She’d lost her ease somewhere between the car and the kitchen. The small space seemed even smaller with him in it, his big body barely leaving room to breathe. Or maybe it was just being close enough to smell him that made it hard. His eyes met hers over the edge of the glass and her heart skipped. If she wasn’t careful, it would stop altogether.

There was only the one couch to sit on. Asking him to sit on it with her seemed a bit too dangerous and way too tempting. Especially after spending the past six hours with every cell in her body screaming to get closer. “Do you want to sit outside?”

“Sure.”

She followed him out, leaving only the screen door closed so that she could hear Casey. The table lamp inside illuminated them in soft light.

The steps were narrow, barely room for the two of them. She sat on the top step, leaning back against the metal railing someone had installed along the steps. Jake leaned back on the other side, one step below her.

“Another nice night,” she said after a moment.

“Yep.” Jake stretched out his right leg and placed his left foot on the bottom step, resting his forearm over his knee. Looking completely comfortable like he sat on stoops and drank water with girls every day, he stared across the small space at the next trailer over. It was white like hers, maybe more rust stains. A stack of pizza boxes near the door looked ready to topple over onto several empty cases of beer.

“The yard is low maintenance,” she joked, her eyes on the sandy, gravelly, grassy mix at the bottom of the steps.

“That’s good. No big lawn to keep up with. And your neighbors are nice and close if you need a cup of sugar.”

Paige laughed and coughed on the water she’d just started to swallow. “I don’t think Bumper there gives out sugar.”

Jake laughed with her. “Okay. Maybe not.”

They spent another minute listening to the night bugs and a dog barking a few rows over. “I wouldn’t mind a lawn to keep up with, though. A little house with a porch Casey and I could plant flowers around. Of course we could plant flowers here, I guess.” But it wouldn’t be the same. She wanted a place she called home that was her own.

He looked at her thoughtfully. “Is that why you work so hard?”

“Yes. And I don’t want Casey to ever have to worry about…things I worried about.”

“Like what?”

“Like pissed-off, unpaid landlords for one thing.”

“Did that happen a lot?”

There was no pity in his tone, which she appreciated. “No. Some. It was more the fear of it.” She thought for a second how to describe what it had been like and how much to tell him. “My mom was more the fun, dance-around-in-your-underwear kind of mom than the responsible, pay-the-rent kind,” she said lightly. “She did her best.”

“And your dad?”

“I met him once on my seventh birthday. He didn’t know it was my birthday. He was there asking my mom for money, which didn’t go over well since I think he was supposed to be bringing money to her.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah.” She shrugged it off. “It’s fine. It was a long time ago. You can’t miss what you never had, right?” She hoped that was true. For Casey’s sake.