It was the most miserable day of my life. I went over the night of the wedding again and again in my head. Erin being sick, both of us running to the ladies, sitting on the floor, telling secrets. Could anyone else have been there? Hiding in one of the cubicles?
I closed my eyes, remembering every detail. The doors were all open, no feet hidden underneath, and there was an empty feel to the place. I could still hear in my head the sounds of the music playing in the hall, people laughing and singing, and in the toilets, our voices echoing in the emptiness, just me and Erin and her secret.
Someone else had to have been there. But who?
I tried constantly, every spare moment I had, to phone Erin on my mobile. Each time there was no answer. I knew she would see my number displayed and not pick up.
As soon as I got home I used the land line, withholding my number this time. It was her mother who answered the phone.
‘Mrs Brodie, can I speak to Erin, please?’ Even I could hear the desperation in my voice.
I couldn’t miss the ice in Mrs Brodie’s. ‘You have some nerve phoning here. Call yourself a friend? Erin hasn’t stopped crying since she came home. Was that your idea of fun? Telling everybody such a thing? I know you’ve got a warped sense of humour, but surely even you know when to draw the line.’
I was so taken aback by the venom in her voice I couldn’t even interrupt to defend myself. And then, in the background, I heard another voice. Erin’s voice.
‘Is that her, Mum? Hang up on her. I never want to talk to her again.’
‘Erin!!!!’ I screamed it through the phone. ‘It wasn’t me.’ But by that time, the line was dead.
I was crying when my mum came home from work. ‘What on earth’s wrong with you?’
I wished I could have told her the whole truth, let it all pour out to someone. But Mum was the last person I would confide in. ‘I had a falling out with Erin,’ was all I said.
She accepted it without a quibble. ‘Och well, give her a phone, apologise, make up. You’ll be friends again by tomorrow.’
And in a way, that made me feel better. Tomorrow I would make Erin listen. I’d make her see that I could never have broken her trust. I went to bed that night, but I didn’t sleep. I tossed and I turned and I prayed. I prayed that tomorrow I was going to be able to make everything all right.
I stood at the school gates waiting for her to arrive, but she didn’t come. Maybe, I thought, she wasn’t coming again today. Then another thought jumped on that. Maybe she was never coming back. She’d been transferred to another school, one that knew nothing of her ‘secret’.
But she did come. I was sitting in class when she arrived. She strode into the classroom, with Rose on one side of her and Heather on the other, for protection. I should have been there too, I thought. I tried to catch her eye, but she totally blanked me.
As soon as Erin sat down, Wizzie whispered, ‘Pssshhhh,’ and the whole class giggled.
Mrs Tasker, the teacher, yelled out, ‘If I hear anything like that again there will be trouble.’
And I realised then that the teachers knew the whole story. Erin was being ‘looked after’ by them as well. I knew too, by the way Mrs Tasker turned her eyes to glare at me, exactly who she blamed for it all. Me.
I looked away. I knew it made me look guilty but I couldn’t help it. Everyone was blaming me, and I hadn’t done anything.
At break, Mrs Tasker made us all stay in our seats until she’d escorted Erin and Rose and Heather out of the class. Wizzie couldn’t keep her mouth shut even then.
‘Ooo, have your friends fallen out with you, Driscoll? Cause you’ve got a big mouth?’
I squared up to her. ‘It wasn’t me and you know it.’
‘If it wasn’t you … who else could it be?’
It was Lauren who said that, poking her face in between us. Then she bellowed with laughter and grabbed at Wizzie’s arm and off they went.
I stood there watching them and I realised I knew the answer.
Lauren’s sister had been a waitress at the wedding. She had glared at us all the time she was serving. She’d ignored Erin at the top table.
Lauren’s sister must have been listening outside the toilet doors while Erin was baring her soul to me.
Lauren’s sister was the one to blame.
Chapter Seventeen
All I could think about was telling Erin, but I couldn’t find any of them anywhere. It seemed the teachers had her well protected. It wasn’t until lunchtime that I saw them coming into the canteen. Erin had purple shadows under her eyes, as if she hadn’t stopped crying. Rose strode beside her like some fierce warrior guard, daring anyone to say a word to her. Heather padded behind them. She looked worried, as if she’d been crying too. The weakest link, that was Heather. Rose and Erin took their seats at our table. I knew I couldn’t get near Erin, but as soon as I saw Heather going up to the counter to wait in the queue I was there beside her. I felt as if every eye in the canteen was on us. I didn’t care.