Worse Than Boys(14)

‘Are you OK?’

She shook her head. ‘I think I’m going to be sick.’

Her uncle positively threw her at me, as if she was ready to vomit all over his kilt. I grabbed her and led her to the toilets. ‘It must be that vodka,’ I said.

‘I don’t feel well, Hannah.’

Erin just made it into a cubicle before she emptied her whole stomach. She knelt on the floor with her head in the bowl, and I sat beside her and rubbed her back as she threw up. What are friends for? Finally, she slumped against the wall, exhausted. Her skin was the colour of wax and her face was covered in sweat. I wet some paper towels and dabbed at her face to cool her down. Then I slid to the floor beside her.

‘Feel better?’ I asked.

She nodded.

‘It’s been a great night, hasn’t it?’

‘Up till now,’ Erin said softly.

‘Not your fault you were sick,’ I said.

‘You’re a great friend, Hannah.’

I only shrugged my shoulders. ‘And you’re a great friend. The best.’

‘Do you mean that?’ she said, suddenly more serious. ‘You’re supposed to have only one best friend, did you know that? There’s four of us. So which one of us would you say was your best friend?’

Was she testing me? What did she want me to say? I knew what I wanted to say. Erin. I wanted Erin to be my best friend. I thought of her as my best friend, but I had a feeling we all did. So I wouldn’t say it. I’d die of embarrassment if she said she preferred Heather or Rose.

But she didn’t.

‘You’re mine,’ she confessed. ‘I’ve always thought you and me are special.’

That was how I felt too, how I’d always felt. ‘I think so too,’ I said. ‘But what about Heather and Rose?’

‘They’re great … almost best friends. But I couldn’t be best friends with Rose. She’s so vain. Her best friend’s her mirror. And as for Heather … let’s face it. She’s lovely, but a bit thick, don’t you think so? She’s just not in our league, Hannah. She’s not as smart as you and me. I mean, she never gets a joke. Haven’t you noticed that?’

How true was that? I agreed with Erin eagerly.

‘But you’re the best, Hannah.’ She hugged me so tightly, I could hardly breathe.

‘You’d probably say the same thing to Rose or Heather if they were here instead of me.’

She pushed me away from her. ‘No, I would not,’ she said. ‘Don’t you believe me?’

‘I want to.’

‘Do you want me to prove it?’ she said suddenly.

‘What do you mean, “prove it”?’ And I giggled.

‘What if I tell you something I’ve never told anybody else in my whole life? A secret.’ Her voice quivered. ‘The seventh magpie. Do you know what the seventh magpie is, Hannah?’

‘One for sorrow, two for joy, three for a girl, and four for a boy –’

Erin took it up. ‘Five for silver, six for gold –’

I finished it for her. ‘Seven for a secret never to be told …’

‘That’s right.’ What she actually said was. ‘Thatsh-right.’ She was slurring her words. Her eyes were hooded. She looked as if she was about to fall asleep. I realised she must be drunk. Talking rubbish, I thought.

‘A secret?’ I said. ‘What secret can you possibly have?’

She began to bite at her knuckles nervously. ‘Have you never wondered how I don’t ever sleep over … anywhere?’

‘You hate leaving your mum.’ It was the reason she always gave. I had never doubted it. ‘And your mum can’t bear the thought of not having her wee Erin in the house.’

Erin shook her head. Her face was so grey now I thought she was going to be sick again. ‘There’s another reason.’

Now I was intrigued. ‘What reason?’

She began waving her hands about. ‘No … no! Big mistake if I tell. Let the circle be unbroken. That’s what my mum always says.’ She was trying to stop herself from telling me all. But by now, she really had me hooked. A secret. A secret never to be told.

‘Oh, come on, Erin. You can’t stop now. What is it? Wait a minute …’ I giggled. ‘You’re really a family of aliens, studying humans, and you all turn into fat ugly gits at midnight.’

‘I wish,’ she said, and she began giggling too. ‘I wish it was something as simple as that. If I tell, you’ve got to promise never to tell. On your mother’s life. On your life. Never to tell anybody. It’s still a secret. Right? Our secret.’