“We can’t have her here tonight. It’ll just make things worse.”
Yet Duncan’s expression told a different story. He was thrilled to see her, the naked truth of his yearning etched in his features.
“This is my decision. Jackson’s told me everything and I’m staying.” She hoped she sounded more confident than she felt. “If all this is real, if you’re werewolves and if I’m destined to be your mate, then I should be by your side.” Her gaze met Grant’s stark one. “I know you won’t hurt me. No matter how much you lose control.”
“We’d never harm you, either as men or wolves. Not physically or any other way,” offered Lance. “But this amber moon thing is all new to us, too. We don’t know what might happen. We may not have the strength or the memory of you to stop.”
“We don’t want to risk it,” added Duncan. “How much has Jackson told you?”
The men leaned against the wall, their chains rattling in the stillness of the cellar.
“I told you. Everything. I know what you are. In one way, it’s a relief. I’ve seen some pretty weird things since I came to Forever, and I was beginning to question my sanity. But when I saw you change…” She pulled an old rickety chair away from the opposite wall and sat down, fearful that what stamina she had left would fail her. “At least now I know it’s real.”
“And the connection?” Duncan’s face was filled with worry, yet tinged with hope. “Do you feel it between us? Like right now?”
“Yes. Or at least I’m guessing it’s what I’m feeling. I’ve never experienced anything like it. It’s terrifying yet amazing.” She searched for more ways to describe the indescribable feeling. “It’s like I’m burning up inside and having sex with you three is the only way to put out the fire.”
And yet, that wasn’t quite all of it. “No, it’s more than sex. It’s a part of me, in every ounce of whatever makes me the person I am. It’s like arriving at a destination that I’ve been running to for my entire life. To say sex is what’s it’s all about is making it, this thing we share, dirty. But it’s not. It’s anything but that.”
“She’s it, all right.” Lance grinned at her, reminding her of why she loved his face so much. “You’re our mate, but we know how hard, how scary it is for you. We’d never force you to stay, but right now, I’m not sure we could keep ourselves from doing exactly that.”
“Leave now, Christy, while you can. It’ll break our hearts, but it’s what’s right for you,” added Duncan.
The tension that had set up shop in her chest loosened the tiniest bit. “I understand. At least, I think I do. But there’s the problem. As much as you might want me to leave for my sake, I want to stay for yours.”
She was ready to risk everything, her future and even her life for them. To leave them alone, chained in a cellar, was unimaginable.
“I’m ready for tomorrow, although I’m not sure what being your mate really means.”
Grant’s chains jangled as he dropped his arms and let the chains keep them over his head. “It means you’re the one and only woman we can ever love. It means you’re the woman we want to have children with. It means you’re the woman we want to grow old with and be buried side by side with.”
His declaration was one of love, of commitment, of everything she’d ever dreamed of. “Why didn’t you tell me before now? I would’ve understood.” She hurt for them, for her, and for all that they might have lost.
“We couldn’t. I saw how you looked at me out there.” Grant bowed his head. “You saw me as a monster. I knew it was possible that you might, and that’s why we couldn’t bring ourselves to tell you, to show you what we are.”
“Is he right? Is that how you see us? As monsters?”
She wanted to reach out and caress Duncan’s face, but Jackson had warned her to keep her distance. “At first, yes. You’re right. It would’ve scared the hell out of me. It’s still scary as hell. But I would’ve done my best to understand.”
Lance’s moan cut her to the bone, urging her to try and ease his pain, if only a little. “But it isn’t any longer, Lance. Not now. Jackson helped me see the truth. Whatever happens when there’s a moon out doesn’t matter as long as you’re still the men I’ve come to care for.”
“We don’t change with every full moon. That’s a myth. We can change whenever we want. And we can resist the shift, too. At least at any other time. But right now, while this moon’s out? It’s like it has power over us. Like we have no choice except to change.”