Link swallowed hard, but shook his head. “No.”
“Do you know who did?” Her voice came out nothing but a squeak. She’d thought she wanted answers but, suddenly, she was scared to find out the truth.
Link dipped his chin once. “The wolf who killed your father is dead.”
“Who was he?”
“My oldest brother.”
The shotgun sagged in her arms. Her lungs weren’t working. It was as if the air was too cold and freezing her tissue until the organ was unusable. She grew light-headed and dizzy as she backed toward the truck.
Link made a single clicking sound behind his teeth and twitched his head as he took a step toward her. “Don’t run. Not until you hear me out.”
“You kissed me!”
“And I’d do it again.”
“You kissed me knowing your brother killed my dad, Link. Is that why you’ve been bringing me little dead bunnies? Fish? Is that why you fixed my generator and fixed the roof on Buck’s cabin?” She lifted her voice, steadily growing into her anger now. “Is it guilt that drew you to me?”
“Yes. At first.”
She huffed an angry breath in response to his bullshit and spun for her truck.
“Nicole, wait! It’s not like that now. I care—fuck! Nicole just listen for five minutes, and then you can bolt. You can run back to your life in the lower forty-eight, and I’ll never bother you again, but you have to understand what happened. You should! If not to give me a chance to explain how fucked up my family is, then for you, so you can gain closure on your dad’s death. And I didn’t kiss you out of guilt!”
The raw desperation in his voice halted her in her tracks. Slowly, she turned. His eyes were blazing almost white, and he dragged his hand through his dark hair, mussing it as a long, volatile snarl rattled his throat.
“Why then, Link?”
“Because you make me feel so damned good, Nicole.” His words broke on her name. “I don’t have much time left, but you calmed the wolf with a touch, and it meant the world. I kissed you because I can’t stop thinking about you. I can’t stop coming up with ways to take care of you, and I know it’s so fucked up the way I do it. You aren’t Alaskan, and you don’t understand the value of those dead rabbits, the fish, or the fucking generator, but it’s all I have. It’s all Wolf knows how to give. I didn’t kiss you out of guilt, Nicole. I kissed you because you feel like mine.”
His voice sounded so broken and honest, that she hesitated. She’d wanted nothing more than to drive away from him in a cloud of snow and exhaust, but her every instinct screamed he was telling the truth. Sagging against the back of the truck, she shook her head over and over. “You’re wrong, you know?”
“About what?” he asked, leaning against the cold metal beside her.
“Buck was Yupik, and I was born here in Galena. I’m part Alaska Native. I might not know the value of those gifts yet, but I’ll figure it out. Does it hurt?”#p#分页标题#e#
“Does what hurt?”
“Being what you are?”
“Say it.”
She swallowed down the acidic vitriol of the word monster she’d thought him to be. That wasn’t right at all. Link hadn’t hurt her, and he hadn’t hurt her dad. “Does it hurt being a werewolf?”
He gritted his teeth so hard, a muscle jumped in his jaw. He blinked slowly and dragged his ice-colored gaze to hers. “Yes,” he murmured.
“How?”
“It hurts to Change. It hurts to hide. It hurts to lose my mind to an animal.” He shifted his weight and dropped his eyes to the ground. “I’ve never told anyone that before.”
Before she could change her mind, she grabbed his hand and squeezed, wishing it was warmer out here so she wouldn’t have to wear her gloves, so she could touch his skin and feel the warmth there. “I’m sorry your brother died.”
“You don’t have to say that. Cole deserved what he got. Wanted it even. He didn’t want to hurt people. You should know what I’ll become, though.” Link stared out over the falling snow with a faraway, troubled look. “I’ll be like him someday. I’ll go crazy, too. I’m already on my way.”
Nicole itched away the tear that had frozen on her cheek and pulled the tailgate of the truck down. Scrambling up onto it, she patted the empty space beside her and waited for Link to sit next to her. “I think you should tell me everything.”
“Everything?” he asked.
“Yeah. I know what you are now, and I’ll keep your secret safe. I understand why you don’t advertise it. I mean, for fuck’s sake, Mr. Nibbles, you’re a friggin’ werewolf.”