Withstanding Me(7)

I’m completely in love with someone who doesn’t love me back and that shit sucks. When Braxxon and the rest of them found me, it was ZZ who coddled me, who made me feel alive again by just mere conversation. Actions and words are sometimes alike that way. He did nothing but he said everything. Everything that made me come alive again. Every time I think back on his words to me that day after the doc looked at me, I fall even more in love with him.

“Darlin’ you’re way too beautiful to let them take your beauty from you. What you went through was just a terribly bad fucked up dream, baby. A dream you’re gonna sweat out and forget about,” he says, while swiping my bangs away from my eyes.

“I’m not stupid you know? You guys treat women like they’re nothing too.”

“Baby… there are two different types of women. Women like the ones that hang around us just want that kinda shit we give them. They wanna be fucked and bossed around. Then there are women like you. Women who want to be owned, loved, and cherished,” he states.

“What kind of woman do you want?” I ask.

“Ah darlin, I want the kind of woman that wants the shit I give them. Women like you are way too good for the likes of me. You deserve to be protected, owned, loved, cherished, worshipped, and any other good shit you can think of. I don’t do the fallin’ in love thing, baby. I love two women. My daughter Tatiana and my ma, but being in love and letting a woman own my ass is not something I’ll allow to happen,” he says honestly.

“That’s a shame, ZZ.”

“It may be darlin’, it just may be.”

I smile as that memory fades away. He was always honest with me, and when a man tells you that you deserve all the love in the world, and it’s a man like ZZ, you tend to believe him. And I do. I believe I deserve it all. My problem is that I want that man to be ZZ. I want all the love in the world to come from him. I want to be a part of his heart.

I sigh as I pick up my handbag to head out for my date with Randy. I’m hoping that I can grow to like him more than just a friend because my love for ZZ is gonna get me nowhere.

***





Chapter Four

ZZ

Damn that daughter of mine. Where the fuck is she? Why the shit does she keep taking off? I don’t know what the hell has gotten into her. My sweet innocent Tatiana is no longer sweet; she’s a pain in my damn ass. Not to mention my shit with Storm. Hell will freeze over before I let any motherfucker touch her before I get to. I want her, and I always get what I want. My damn head is spinning in all kinds of fucking directions as I race down the winding road on my bike, my hands gripping the handlebars tightly.

FUCK!

I seriously need to stick my dick in a nice warm cunt.

I don’t even bother backing up my bike as I speed into the clubhouse parking lot. Ten to one, I’m getting back on my lady in a few minutes anyways. Shadow starts walking towards me as I stand up and toss my helmet onto the seat of my wife.

“Alright Shadow, start talkin’. You’ve been followin’ my baby girl around for a bit now. What’s the little shit up to now?”

I watch as he adjusts the leather black bracelet around his wrist, before lighting up his joint. He sucks in his first hit, cutting his black eyes straight at me.

“She’s in some shit, ZZ.”

I run both hands through my hair and lean against my bike, crossing my legs. “Just fuckin pull the scab off brother.”

“She’s… fuck… brother she’s pokin around in my neck of the woods.”

My entire body shoots forward as Shadow starts to back away slowly.

“No man, not me.” He says sucking in another puff.

“HOW… THE… FUCK?”

“You had me babysittin her ass. I followed her; she didn’t go in. She did however meet up with a guy in the parking lot though.” He shrugs as if this isn’t a big deal. He’s fuckin’ head over heels for my daughter, and yet here he is acting as if this isn’t a big deal. The only reason I don’t want Shadow with my daughter is because of his side lifestyle. If it weren’t for that, I wouldn’t give a shit. He’s a good dude, a great brother.

“How in the hell did she even discover this shit? I mean, seriously? She’s eighteen years old!”

Like I ain’t got enough shit on my plate, now I gotta worry about my daughter being someplace she shouldn’t even know about?

“That’s fucked, brother. Ain’t nothin fuckin wrong with the other part of my life; watch your fuckin daughter your goddamned self. I got better shit to do.”

DAMMIT!

I watch as my young brother shakes his head and walks away. Fuck man. I overstepped my boundaries, like he ain’t got enough demons. I don’t stop him, I can’t. He needs time to cool off as I would too. I spot Rap messing with his bike and figure it’s best for me to send him on the search for Tatiana. If I find her, I know I’ll say and do something I’ll regret.