“It’s never been like this for me, Brooke,” Saxon says as he mindlessly runs his fingertips up and down my ribs.
I feel the atmosphere changing and don’t want to ruin what we have going. Deciding to lighten the moment and put a stop to any seriousness, I push Saxon off as I laugh. “Right, I’m sure that’s what you say to all the girls.” I stand from the couch, forcing him to sit up, and begin collecting my clothes.
He isn’t laughing though. “You should know by now, Brooke, I don’t say anything I don’t mean.” He’s looking up at me, his face serious and his eyes stern. He’s mad, mad I made a joke when he put his feelings on the line.
He’s right; he is definitely not one to say things to please others. Deciding to ignore his comment, I put on my thong and do up my bra, quickly pulling up my jeans. I pick up my blouse and begin to inspect it. There isn’t even enough buttons left to get me home.
“I’ll grab you something to wear,” Saxon says with a smirk. He quickly pulls on his jeans, sans underwear, and slips on his shirt as he makes his way to his bedroom.
I can’t help but stare after him. My God, he is beautiful. Even the way he threw his t-shirt over his head was hot. His strong arms reaching up as he brought it over his head… God, Brooke, stop. This is ridiculous. You’d think you’d never seen a hot guy before.
He returns, making his way over to me and handing me a white cotton t-shirt. I quickly slip it on and tuck the front into my jeans so it’s not hanging so long down my thighs.
“Are you hungry? Do you want some dessert? Want to watch a movie?” Saxon is rambling, and I can hear the nervousness in his voice. He knew this time was coming, and I almost feel bad having to be the one to break it to him.
“I might actually get going. I’m pretty tired.”
He sighs heavily. Yeah, he knew it was coming. “You don’t have to go, Brooke. Stay, please.”
“Sax,” I plead. “Come on, you know how it is. Please don’t make it a big deal.”
“Are you going to run every time we have sex, Brooke? Because I can tell you, you’ll be running a lot.” Cocky-and-in-control Saxon is back, and I don’t want to be fighting after the wonderful day we’ve had.
“I’m not running, Saxon. You’re just turning this into something it’s not. We had a great day hanging out, enjoying each other’s company, and now it’s time to go home. What’s the problem?”
“Nothing,” he growls. His jaw is tight, and I know he’s biting his tongue and holding back what he really wants to say. “I’ll grab my keys.” He storms off towards the front door.
“It’s fine, I’ll call a taxi,” I call out. His body stiffens, and I know I shouldn’t have said that.
“You are not catching a taxi alone and going home by yourself at this hour.” His voice leaves no room for argument, and he doesn’t even turn to look at me as he grabs his keys, slips on his shoes, and heads out the front door.
One month later
Standing against the staff room counter, waiting for the coffee to brew, I reflect on what has happened over the past month.
Saxon and I have easily fallen into a routine of working nights, late dinners, and business functions. Most of these normally involving sex of some kind. The chemistry between us is explosive, and when we’re alone, we struggle to keep our hands off one another.
Sex with Saxon is intoxicating. Whether it’s animalistic and raw or gentle and loving, on the desk, on the couch, in a bed, or in the back of a car, it’s always all-consuming.
He has stuck to my guidelines of no sleepovers and no discussing what we’re doing. I know it bothers him, and his frustration is clear every time something comes up, and he wants to deal with it. Such as me making him lie to people about us or when his face falls every time I mention taking me home.
I turn, to pour my coffee. Harper steps into the staff room as I stir in my milk.
“What are you humming?” she asks as she heads to the fridge.
“I didn’t realise I was humming?”
“You’re always humming lately.”
“What does that mean?” I turn to face her.
“Nothing, Brooke. You just seem to be doing well. Humming is a sign of happiness, and you’ve been doing it a lot lately. Obviously you’re doing it without even realising. Must mean you’re doing better.” She says the last bit quietly.
I can’t help but think of Saxon. Is he the reason for my humming? Am I happy? I’m definitely not moping around anymore. I wouldn’t say I’m happy all the time, and I definitely still think of Nate constantly, but am I feeling less depressed? Stronger even?