Where the Streets Have No Name(52)

Her hand closed over the doorknob. Daniel’s hand covered hers. She fought the knee-jerk reaction to pull away from his touch. Half of her wanted it. The other part feared her response to him.

“Don’t run, love.” Heat from his breath tickled the back of her neck. “Please. I’m trying.”

She couldn’t help but ask. “Trying what?”

“Trying to think of something to say to you so you’ll know just how much I need you in my life.”

His words hitched her breath and shocked her system.

“I’m sorry, love. Sorry for pushing you away. Sorry for asking you if the baby is mine. Of course it’s mine. I…I see it now. Looking back, I see how you felt.” Daniel rested his head on her shoulder. “Nothing I say out loud comes out right. It sounds fine in my head and when I open my mouth something else comes out.”

Nervous laughter bubbled in her throat. “Five months, Daniel.”

“Aye,” he whispered.

“Five months and not even a phone call. You…you pushed me away. Made me feel like nothing. Less than nothing.”

“I’m sorry, love. So sorry.” His hand moved away from hers, up her arm, gliding slowly to brush her hair from her neck. Daniel pressed a chaste kiss where her neck met her shoulder. “I don’t expect you’ll forgive me, but I hope you’ll at least let me be a part of your life. Even if you don’t want me.”

So now he was putting everything in her hands. She was just supposed to take him back, forget what happened, and that’s that? No. It might happen in movies and books, but in real life, actions had consequences. Her current condition was a consequence of acting rashly. She’d not trade that consequence in for anything, but Amelia still had to hold herself responsible and do what was right for her and her unborn child.

“It’s not that I don’t want you, Daniel.” She slipped from his touch. If she let him hold her, she’d lose focus and end up in his arms again. “I just need time. This can’t be like some romance novel where the guy shows up at the end and everything is going to be all right because he came back for the girl. It isn’t just me anymore. I have to stay strong.”

He nodded but his eyes weren’t understanding. They were pleading. Begging. “I’m an arsehole, Amelia.”

“A twat-waffle.” She grinned.

Daniel’s answering smile filled her heart with pure, unfiltered sunshine. “Aye. A massive twat-waffle, love. So what do you think? Will you let me show you how sorry I am? Will you let me back in?”

Her pulse triple-timed. Wind hammered at the cabin. Silence, apart from their mingled breaths and the beating of her heart, engulfed them. Could she open her heart again and risk having it broken a second time?

“You don’t have to answer right away. Take some time. Think about it. Take all the time you need. But you had better know that I’m not giving up you…on us. Ever.” Slowly he got to his knees in front of her and held his hands out an inch from her belly. “Can…can I?” He looked up, hope flaring in his expression.

Amelia took his hands and placed them on her abdomen. “Regardless of how it happened, this baby is yours too, Daniel. And if you want to be a part of his or her life, I won’t stop you. I want you to, i-if you want to.”

“Want to?” Daniel moved his large palms over the tight surface of her belly. She heard him suck in a breath when the baby squirmed inside her. “Jaysus.” He dropped his forehead to her abdomen. “We’re having a baby, Amelia.”

Of their own volition, her fingers slipped through the dense silk of his hair. In a two week span, how often had she done this? A hundred times. A thousand. She thought she’d have a lifetime with him until he pushed her away. It would be so easy to bring him into her room, to lie down beside him on her bed, to forgive him, to let him back into her heart.

But she’d fall to pieces if history repeated itself.

“I came here expecting just to beg you to let me into your life, in whatever way you’d allow me.” His hands slid beneath her sweater, pushing the fabric up, baring her stretch marks and inside out belly button to his view. She tried to hide it but he stopped her. “No, love. Don’t hide. Don’t ever hide. You’re incredible. Beautiful.” Daniel kissed her belly and was greeted with a kick to the face.

Amelia laughed and Daniel laughed with her. His hands circled around, linking at the small of her back. He sighed, rubbing his cheek against her and their baby. Rough and stubbly, it reminded her of the first time he’d dropped between her thighs and tasted her.