“Not really. This is good. We’re getting to know each other.” She liked that he was troubled by his baby sister’s assessments. Some people would have brushed aside a twelve-year-old’s opinion but Malcolm had taken her words to heart.
Their server returned with their drinks. Malcolm raised his glass.
“To not smiling too much.”
She laughed. “Absolutely.”
“Tell me about your dad being in the hospital,” he said. “Is everything all right now?”
“It is. He was a Seattle PD cop who was shot in the line of duty. He’s in a wheelchair now. It was a tough adjustment but he did great. The whole city rallied to help.”
He frowned. “When was this?”
“About eighteen months ago.”
“I remember when it happened. Wasn’t there another police officer—one who was killed?”
She set down her glass. “There was. Tim and I grew up together. We started dating when I was in high school and we were four weeks from getting married when he died.”
Malcolm stared at her. “I’m sorry.”
“Thank you. It was really difficult. Dealing with the loss and worrying about my dad.” Feelings swamped her—like familiar friends who reminded her of a time she wanted to forget. “Everyone on the street where Tim and I grew up rallied and that helped. I pretty much lived at the hospital for three months. That’s how I know everyone.”
She didn’t tell him how the sense of comfort had morphed over the weeks—how by the time her dad was able to go home she’d felt trapped. As if everyone was allowed to move on but her. Everyone was allowed to heal and change, except her. She was supposed to mourn Tim forever, to never be whole without him.
“My dad’s doing great,” she continued. “He’s healthy. He doesn’t see the wheelchair as a handicap. It just is.” She smiled. “He started dating Tim’s mother and they’re getting married. In fact they’re taking their first cruise in the fall.”
“That’s great. You must be relieved to know he’s happy.”
“I am.”
“What about you? Are you happy?”
An unexpected question. “Most of time,” she lied. “I spent about a year feeling lost and confused, then I decided to quit my job and go back to college.”
“What did you used to do?”
“I worked in finance, at Boeing.” She’d been on the fast track for senior management. She’d been tapped early and given challenging assignments. At first Tim had been proud, but then he’d worried that her job was too important to her.
Malcolm raised his eyebrows. “My best friend is a finance guy. Numbers rule.”
She grinned. “You know it.”
“You’ve made a one-eighty turn. Are you excited about your field of study?”
“At this point, I’m mostly nervous. I’m making up the classes I missed getting my business degree. Right now that means math and science.”
“That’s right, you’re taking biology. How was the dissection?”
“Delayed. Keira grossed me out by mentioning it might have been an inventory problem somewhere.”
“Not a supply chain we want to talk about.” He studied her for a second. “You’re impressive.”
The compliment surprised her. “Why would you say that?”
“Look at all you’ve been through in the past couple of years. It would have immobilized most people, but here you are, moving in a completely different direction. You’re fearless. I admire that, and maybe I’m a little envious.”
“Why?”
He leaned toward her and lowered his voice. “Promise not to tell anyone?”
“Of course.”
“I’m inheriting a family business, which means my future was set for me long ago. Don’t get me wrong—I don’t want to do anything else. I’ve been very lucky and I get that, but every now and then I daydream about what it would be like to have taken another path.”
“Such as?”
He grinned. “No idea. Some days I think it would be nice to fly jets for the navy.”
“Land on an aircraft carrier?”
“Biggest rush around. Or maybe captain a charter boat in the Caribbean.”
“Those are not the same thing.”
“Yeah, I know.”
She smiled. “They are also both serious ‘I’m in charge’ positions, so whatever you daydream about, you’re never a follower.”
“You’re right. Whatever it is, it’s fun to think about, but at the end of the day, I’m where I’m supposed to be.”
“A good feeling.”
“It is.”
She sipped her drink, all the while envying his sense of certainty. Ever since the shooting, she’d been lost. Nothing had felt right and it still didn’t.
No, she thought, knowing it was stupid to lie to herself. Her sense of wrong place, wrong time had started long before the shooting. It had started when Tim had proposed. Although she’d known it was coming, she was still surprised. So surprised, she’d almost not said yes. Only it had been Tim and weren’t they supposed to be together always?
Not questions to think about while with another man, she reminded herself. Especially a handsome, successful guy who worried about his new-to-him sister. Better for her to be happy about her good fortune and let the rest of it take care of itself.
“So,” she said, her voice teasing. “I’m thinking of having fish.”
Malcolm stared at her. “Is this you being funny, because do you know where we are?”
She grinned. “You are so easy.”
“I can be, if that’s interesting.”
She laughed. “It just might be.”
* * *
The evening flew by. Delaney had been prepared for awkward silences as they got to know each other, but conversation had flowed. Malcolm told her about growing up in Portland with a single mother until they moved to Seattle when he was twelve and how hard it had been to settle into a new life. She talked about what it was like living on a street where everyone knew everything about her and she had dozens of moms to fill in for the one she’d never known. She even mentioned how, at the end of the day, those fill-in moms had gone back to their own families, leaving her behind.
They discovered they both loved horror movies—the cheesier the better—jazz and dark chocolate. They had a few mutual acquaintances from her days in the corporate world and neither of them understood people who didn’t like the Seattle winters.
“The cold rain is the best,” Delaney said. “It’s an excuse to sit by a fire, read and drink hot chocolate.”
“Or something stronger, although I’m with you on the reading.”
The busy restaurant had gotten a little more quiet. Delaney noticed that several of the booths around them were empty and realized it was much later than she’d thought. Malcolm had long since paid the bill and they were on their second cup of decaf.
“This has been great,” she said with a smile. “Thank you for asking me out to dinner.”
“Thank you for taking care of Keira.”
They both stood and walked out front.
“How are you getting home?” he asked.
“Uber.” Because no one drove in the city if they didn’t have to.
“Me, too. Want to share?”
“Sure.”
He opened the app on his phone and entered her address, then requested the car.
“Three minutes,” he said, sounding unhappy. “Sometimes they’re too efficient.”
“Why would you say—”
Before she could finish her sentence, he pulled her around the corner and took her in his arms. His mouth settled on hers. The kiss was warm, gentle and more arousing than she’d expected. Need exploded, wanting grew and the urge to press her body against his was overwhelming. Delaney had to grab control with both hands to keep from whimpering as he drew back.
“And there’s our car.” His voice was regretful.
She was shaking too hard to respond. What on earth had just happened? Was her reaction because she’d been alone for so long or was it more specifically about Malcolm? It had just been a very chaste kiss. There hadn’t even been any tongue. Yet she was aroused to the point of pain. Her breasts ached and between her legs, the very center of her was damp and swollen.
She slid into the back seat as Malcolm confirmed there would be two stops. She wanted to protest, instead telling him to come home with her. She wanted his hands everywhere, his mouth on hers, and his penis filling her until she had no choice but to climax and maybe scream.
Her reaction confused her. Yes, she’d always enjoyed making love with Tim, but she’d never been frantic before. She’d never wanted to beg and plead and rip off her clothes and—
“I had a good time,” he said quietly.
“Me, too.”
“I’d like to see you again.”
She managed a shaky smile. “I’d like to be seen.”
He chuckled. “Good. I’ll call you.”
They arrived at her building. They both got out. He kissed her again, more quickly this time, but her reaction was still the same. Intensely powerful arousal left her weak and desperate.
“Good night, Delaney,” he said.
Dammit, Malcolm, come upstairs and take me as hard as you can. Only she didn’t say that. She never had and she wasn’t sure she had the courage. So instead she murmured, “Night,” and walked to the door leading to the lobby.