While she was waiting for Paula to be rescued, her stomach folding in on itself like cake batter, Chloe had made a mental vow to stop doing Gill’s dirty work. But then had come that moment during the orienteering when she’d entered the clearing and seen Sarah asleep and Rachel with her back to her, standing at the top of the bank by the stream, and she hadn’t been able to resist. One little shove. Not even a shove really, more of a tap, and down she’d gone. Chloe hadn’t wanted to hurt her, hadn’t even known there were rocks down there. All she’d been thinking of was how mortified Rachel would be, to be found sprawled in the mud in front of her staff.
And Ewan especially.
Then that had gone wrong too, when Rachel hurt her head. There’d been a sickening moment when Chloe actually thought she might be dead.
Well, no more. Chloe understood why her former boss felt aggrieved, and she’d have loved to see Gill triumphantly reinstated after the department fell apart under Rachel’s leadership, but she’d done her bit, and now two people had very nearly come to harm because of her, and she felt grubby and guilty and didn’t want any further part of it.
In truth, Chloe was beginning to feel a bit freaked out by how Gill had acted since her sacking. On the surface of things, she always pretended things were great, as if she’d been deluged with offers and was just taking her time deciding which one to pick. But Chloe knew from things she’d let slip that prospective employers weren’t exactly beating a path to her door. And while no one could blame Gill for being resentful of Rachel, there was something about her obsession with her successor that was kind of creepy.
If only she could talk to Ewan about it. All of it.
Hurriedly she tapped out an email: Cheeky pint in the Blue Posts after work? But then an image came into her head of his face looming up over her in that hotel room in Derbyshire, and she quickly pressed delete, feeling lonelier than ever.
With a leaden feeling like there was a large lump lodged inside her gut, Chloe went back to dealing with the mass of unanswered emails in her inbox, but her focus was once again interrupted when the door to the main office swung open and Mark Hamilton walked through. His appearances on this floor were rare enough for this to pique Chloe’s curiosity, especially when he paused by Amira’s desk. To Chloe’s astonishment, Amira nodded at him before pushing back her chair and following him across the office to Rachel’s door, where Mark rapped once before barging in, Amira on his heels. From inside came the sound of raised voices. Chloe locked eyes with Sarah, who shrugged almost imperceptibly in an I don’t know anything either way.
The mystery intensified a few minutes later when the door was once again flung open and Rachel appeared, looking unusually agitated.
‘Charlie. A moment.’
Charlie? What now?
At his desk, Charlie exhaled, a lengthy sigh that whooshed across the office. Then, slowly, he got to his feet and he too disappeared into Rachel’s office. Chloe tried to catch Sarah’s gaze again, but Sarah had turned away when Charlie walked past. Chloe felt for her. Losing an ally was gut-wrenching. Still the voices in the office went on. And now the door was opening yet again to reveal a very pale Rachel.
‘Paula. Can you join us, please?’
Chloe’s head swung around towards Paula’s desk, expecting her to be springing to her feet as she normally would. But the deputy manager remained still, gazing ahead at her screen with that strange look she’d worn all day. Something was very wrong.
‘Paula, did you hear me? I’m asking you to step into my office.’
Still Paula didn’t respond, just stared at her screen as if she was playing a videogame and they – Rachel, Chloe, Amira, even Mark Hamilton – were just characters in it, not real people at all.
‘Paula?’
For the first time, Chloe detected a waver in Rachel’s voice and was astonished to feel a pang of sympathy for her. There was something so weird about Paula’s refusal to engage. So unsettling.
For a few seconds, Rachel stood in the doorway of her office as if uncertain what to do next. Paula didn’t alter her expression at all, didn’t give anything away.
The silence stretched out across the office like an elastic band until it was tight enough to snap.
35
Sarah
‘You’ll just have to tell them he’s ill. They’ll understand.’
‘Are you insane? There was a meeting yesterday basically trying to work out how to get rid of me. If I get the sack there’ll be no maternity pay, no nothing. And no one will give me a job while I’m pregnant. So unless you’ve suddenly had a pay rise that can support us all, you’re going to have to take the day off.’