When She Was Bad(54)

‘Bad?’ Ed asked.

‘You know. Evil. And the thing was, I felt it too – that there was something wrong with the baby, some kind of bad energy. Do you know what I’m talking about?’ She looked at both of us, as if waiting for us to agree with her.

‘How was it when the baby was born?’ I asked her. ‘Did Peter come round?’

Noelle shook her head.

‘Not at all. He wouldn’t even stay with me in the hospital. Said he couldn’t bear to see what was going to come out of me. I was so scared on my own in that hospital room. The labour was horrible. Thirty-six hours of agony. It was like my body was fighting against the baby, trying to stop it being born. When it came out, I couldn’t look at it for fear that it would be some sort of monster.’

‘He,’ I said before I could stop myself. ‘Your baby was a he, Noelle. And he was perfect, wasn’t he, despite what Peter had said?’

‘Some deformities aren’t on the outside,’ she said. ‘The doctor gave the baby to me and tried to get me to put it on the breast but I didn’t want it near me. I used a bottle, right from the start. Not like with Laurie. I breastfed her until she was three years old.’

Looking around as if she wanted a medal or something.

‘How was Peter’s relationship with the baby when you got home?’

‘Relationship? I don’t think you could call it that. Pete couldn’t bear the noise it made. It was a real demanding baby. All the time screaming. Crying. No matter what I did. He made it sleep downstairs in the utility room so we couldn’t hear it.’

‘How about Laurie? How did she react to him?’

‘She was only a baby herself. She just seemed to accept everything as it was. She didn’t know any different.’

‘You must have taken him for check-ups after you were discharged from hospital,’ I said.

‘Sure. One or two. But then Pete got offered another job. Out of state. With one of the client’s companies, here in La Luz City. I didn’t want to move. I had friends in Missouri – other moms, you know. But Pete, he didn’t listen. He still thought I’d slept with half the state. Wanted a new start, so we moved here, to the house on Franklin Street. Total clean break. I hoped at least the move might stop him acting so crazy, but it just made him worse.

‘He said the baby would have to sleep in the basement. Said it would be too shameful for new neighbours to see it. Insisted they’d know it was deformed.’

‘And you just let it happen, without raising any objections?’ I tried to keep my voice level, but it rose up at the end.

‘You’ve got to realize the kind of person Pete is. He’s real clever, real powerful. He gets into your head, you know. He takes over your thoughts. Right from the beginning he was telling me there was something wrong with the baby. Then he started saying we needed to keep it away from Laurie, you know, so she wouldn’t be affected by it. Polluted by it.’

‘Surely one of the neighbours must have noticed you moving in with the baby?’ Ed asked. ‘I mean, you must have had baby stuff. A stroller, for example.’

Noelle stared at him dully. ‘What did it need a stroller for? It never went out.’

‘Well, a crib then?’

‘We arrived in the evening, after dark. Pete made sure of that. So no one saw us going into the house. Like I said, Laurie was still pretty much a baby herself so if anyone saw us taking baby stuff into the house they’d assume it was for her. And if they heard it crying, they’d think that was her too. Anyway, Pete’s very good with his hands and it wasn’t long before he had that basement soundproofed, and he built that special room in there.’

‘Room? You mean the cage?’ I asked.

Noelle ignored me.

‘It was quite comfortable down there. Kind of cosy, you know?’

‘I still don’t get why you didn’t just leave it with the welfare services in Missouri?’ asked Ed, not even realizing he’d fallen into Noelle’s way of referring to her son. ‘You clearly hadn’t bonded with it. Why not get rid of the baby? Start again afresh.’

Noelle stared at him as if he’d said something outrageous.

‘It was my baby. There was no question that it – he – wouldn’t come with me. That’s what being a mother is. You don’t get to pick and choose. You deal with what you’re given.’

She was something all right.

‘And after you moved in, you never registered David with any health agency?’

‘No authorities. Pete said it was better for us and for Laurie that no one knew about it, on account of it being so deformed.’