“So am I.” Over the last week, they’d used their long calls to get to know each other better. She let her guard down. He opened up about his family, his life. In the quiet evenings, the distance and phone a buffer, her past put aside, they connected on another level. Deeper than they had on the long rides they took together when he told her outrageous stories about the trouble he and his brothers used to get into when they were young. A bunch of rascals, they ran wild, played hard, and loved each other like family should.
“I want to tell him I got my cast off.” She moved her wrist and wiggled her fingers. Nothing like having her hand free again. “Did he say when he’d be back? I thought he’d be here by now.”
“He and your grandfather got stuck in a big storm, so they’re staying an extra day at the Fairfield Ranch. They didn’t want to risk driving in the storm with the horses in the trailers. They spook easily. They should be home late tomorrow night.
“I know it’s not my place, but since you don’t have a mother to talk to, I wanted to ask how things are going between you and Blake. You seem to have grown very close in the short time you’ve lived here.”
“All I’ve wanted to do since I met him is get closer to him, even though it scares me. We agreed to take things slow. Though now all I want is for him to come home so I can get my hands on him.” She said it without thinking, and the blush sparked at her breasts and spread up to her forehead like wildfire.
Dee laughed. “Don’t worry, dear. You’re a grown woman, and you know your own mind. Lord, that boy fell hard for you. Do you feel the same way about him?”
It wasn’t obvious? Did she hide her feelings that well? If her grandmother had to ask, did Blake wonder how she truly felt? Didn’t he know?
She knew her heart, but maybe she needed to share it with Blake. Scary, but necessary if she wanted this to work. “I love him. I don’t know how it happened, but somehow he got inside my heart, and he won’t let go. I don’t want him to.”
“Have you told him how you feel?”
“He knows I care for him. We like being together. Like I said, we’re taking things slow. My feelings and his seem to be a force between us. I don’t know how much longer I can hold off on letting them loose. Do you know what I mean? I’ve never felt this way.”
Even now, just thinking about him made her stomach knot and her heart beat faster. If he was here, she’d go into his arms and kiss him. She knew exactly what he felt like pressed against her. She knew exactly the way his mouth fit over hers, and how he tasted of coffee and mint, tinged with his need for her. She knew his smell and the way he walked. She knew a thousand little things about him because she couldn’t help but watch him when he was near or ask him everything about himself. She couldn’t get enough of him. And she didn’t think this feeling would ever go away. She hoped it never did.
“You look for him whenever you have something to say. You look for him at the table in the morning and at night.”
“I miss him,” she said miserably. “I don’t think I’ve ever missed anyone in my whole life. I’m happy that I have him, and I’m terrified all at the same time.”
“Sounds like you love him to me. I miss your grandfather something terrible when he’s gone.”
Things had been building before Blake left. She didn’t want to wait for him anymore. She hoped he didn’t want to wait for her. She loved him. She wanted to show him how much. She missed his kisses and the way he’d always run a hand down her hair. She missed the way he’d come up behind her in the stables and wrap his arms around her and kiss her neck. She missed the way his fingers gripped her hips and pulled her close when they got lost in a kiss.
She shook off thoughts of Blake. “I need to go up and talk to Justin. I punished him, and that was my mistake. He didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Talk to him about the reasons you did what you did. He’ll understand.”
Gillian hugged her grandmother. She’d become a real friend, and Gillian appreciated the easy way in which they talked. No judgment. No telling her what to do. “Thanks for the ear. Does Blake want me to call him back?”
“No. He and some of the guys are going out. He owed them a beer for all their hard work. I guess they’ve been going at it pretty hard since they left.”
Gillian frowned, wishing she could talk to him.
“Does it bother you if he goes out with the guys for a drink?”
“No. Blake isn’t a drunk. In fact, I haven’t seen him drink at all.”