When It's Right(61)
Her grandmother slipped behind the wheel and started the truck. “Are you okay?”
“Fine.”
Her grandmother narrowed her eyes at her too-quick reply.
“Really. I’m fine. It’s nothing.” Nothing but a ghost from her past haunting her. That was the second time her mind had played tricks on her. Why? Because she’d allowed herself to have fun with her grandmother: shopping, chatting, being normal. The guilt over what she’d done hung on like a barnacle. She’d never be rid of it, but she could ignore it for longer periods as the days passed and she embraced her new future. So why did she keep seeing her dead father?
I am not going crazy, she chanted in her mind, staring out the window as her grandmother drove them home.
“Gillian?”
“Huh?”
“We’re home, sweetheart. You sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah. Fine. Thank you so much for everything. I had fun today.”
Her grandmother gave her a look that said, Yeah right.
Blake opened her door, and she jumped.
“Hey, sorry.” Blake took a step back to give her some space. He hadn’t meant to startle her. “You okay?”
“Why does everyone keep asking me that?”
“Uh, because you don’t look okay.”
“Would you please help take the groceries in?” she asked him. “I have something I need to do.”
She slipped out of the truck, landing on her good leg in front of him. She darted around his side and took off for the barn.
He turned to Dee. “What was that all about?”
“I don’t know. Everything seemed fine. We picked up the groceries and shopped at one of the stores. Kind of a girls’ day.”
“Sounds fun.”
“Yes. But when we walked back to the truck, something happened.”
“What?”
“I don’t know.”
Blake thought of the day they went shopping in town. “She got spooked, closed up, and went quiet on you.”
“Yes. But there was no reason for her reaction.”
“Killing her father is reason enough. She’s fine most of the time, but when things really get to her, she takes off for the horses.”
They both stared toward the barn doors Gillian disappeared through moments ago.
“Come on. Let’s get this inside. I’ll give her a few minutes to settle down with Boots and take her riding.” Blake remembered the first time he’d gotten her up on a horse. The smile that brightened her face and eyes. She loved it. Every evening before dinner now, she asked him to take her for a ride. A quick study, she got better and better. She rode so well, she didn’t really need his assistance anymore.
“I’ve never seen someone get up on a horse for the first time and make it look so easy.”
“It’s like she was born in a saddle. It’s the only time I see her let everything else go and just be.” He loved those short glimpses of the real Gillian. The girl who loved the outdoors, the horses, the quiet solitude of a ride. Spending time together alone.
Blake found Gillian in Boots’s stall. Not surprising. She worked the brush over Boots’s thickening coat. The horse looked better. So did Gillian. But not by much.
Boots noticed him first and huffed out a breath, alerting Gillian. Her head shot around, and she stared at him, eyes wide. Yep, still spooked.
“Come with me.” He kept his voice soft. Calm. He wanted her to let her guard down, not reinforce her walls even more.
“Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.”
“Blake, I—”
“Need to come with me right now.” She hesitated, so he added, “Please. You’ll like it. I promise.”
One eyebrow shot up, but he didn’t add a teasing innuendo, even though she expected it. He kept things light.
He opened the stall door and let her out. Boots groaned at her, not wanting to let her go. He loved her visits as much as she loved being with him. She stopped and turned back. “I’ll be back soon,” she crooned. Boots nickered, letting her know he couldn’t wait. They’d learned to communicate with each other. A must for working with the large animals. Gillian did it with little coaching from Blake.
“I’ll bring her back,” Blake told Boots.
Boots whinnied. A definite, You better.
“I think he’s jealous,” Gillian said.
“He’ll get over it.” Blake took her hand. She flinched. Not good, but he held on, hoping she’d relax. She did, but it took a minute.
He walked her outside. She stopped, stared at the saddled horses, and sighed.
“Let’s ride, pretty girl.”
“Pretty, huh?”
Blake took a chance and reached up to touch the bird-in-flight clip. He rested his hand against her head and stared down at her. “Beautiful.” He let that sink in for a minute. “I like the birds.”