When I Fall in Love(99)

He looked at her fast, a crease in his brow.

“Nothing bad. In fact, it was all good. I realized that . . . well, I’d gone to Hawaii looking for something. It wasn’t until you left that I realized the thing I was looking for wasn’t you. It was God. I want more out of life than just . . . just staying where my fears trap me. I want to know all that God has for me—His love, His power, His grace. And it wasn’t until I gave up everything I was holding on to and reached out for Him that I realized it was right there, waiting for me. I’d just missed it because I thought I could find it in you.”

He seemed worried, even hurt, so she touched his cheek. “You are an amazing man, Max. You are brave and patient, and you can cook circles around me. But I am going to be okay without you.”

His eyes glistened and his expression broke, something desperate in it. “But I don’t think I’ll be okay without you.” He took her face in his hands. “I love you, Grace. Wow, I want to love you. I want you in my life. I want to grow old with you and have babies with you—”

She kissed him. Just rose up on her toes and pressed her lips to his.

She tasted salt in his touch, and it only whetted her heart for him. She wrapped her hands around his neck, pulled him closer.

And then, with a tiny groan that escaped from deep inside him, he kissed her back. His arms went around her, and he pulled her to himself, into his strong arms, kissing her as if he couldn’t get enough of her. He touched his lips to her eyes, her cheeks, returning finally to her mouth.

Max. She slowed his pace, running her thumbs down his cheekbones.

Sweet Max was crying.

He pulled back and tried to smile, but it was lopsided. He opened his mouth, but nothing emerged.

She’d rendered him speechless. I love you, too. The words were bubbling up, ready to burst from her, when his phone rang.

He stared at his pocket as if it might contain a bomb.

Grace laughed. “Get it, Max.”

“Uh—”

“Seriously. I’m not going anywhere.”

He held her hand, though, as he glanced at the screen, then frowned and answered the phone. “Yeah?”

He listened for a bit, his face growing darker. “I’ll have to call you back.” He hung up, pocketed the phone.

She asked, “What’s the matter?”

“It’s probably nothing. I need to get you home so you can change for the rehearsal dinner.”

Oh. She couldn’t deny the boulder that landed on her chest. He held her hand all the way to the car, tight, as if he couldn’t bear to let the moment go either. But they’d have more. At the wedding tomorrow and then . . .

Then . . . ?

It was on her lips to ask, but it felt so vulnerable and raw. Maybe she’d wait until she told him she loved him. Maybe then they could talk about a future.

He glanced at her now and again, squeezing her hand as he drove. But when they pulled up to Eden’s house, he didn’t get out.

Didn’t kiss her good-bye.

He just drove off, and she had the strangest sense, like she did in Hawaii, that she might not see him again.

Silly, right?



At night, it became easier to forget her mistakes. Her appetite returned, her stomach stopped betraying her, and Raina felt normal.

At least as normal as she could muster, given the fact that her life seemed to be unraveling before her eyes. Her plans to stay in Deep Haven, to become a part of Casper’s life, his family, were all a gnarled, sad mess.

In a way she was a part of the family, except she wasn’t going to show up on the Christiansens’ doorstep with Owen’s child in her arms, like an episode of All My Children.

No. Any hope of being a part of that family Owen had stolen from her. Maybe she’d stolen it, too, but regardless, she could never return to Deep Haven. To the Christiansens.

If only her car hadn’t quit on her earlier this week, she could leave. But maybe as soon as the reception finished, she’d get on a bus, head west. Maybe to . . .

It didn’t matter. Anywhere but where her memories might find her.

Raina stood in front of the sink, letting the steam rise as she finished washing the last of the butcher knives. She’d already prepped the salad and vegetables for tomorrow, already looked over the schedule, already been assured that everything would hum along as planned, the vegetables roasting, the pig on the grill. She’d sent home the kitchen assistants and then taken a final walk through the venue.

The beautifully decorated warehouse did capture the romance of the event, with the lights glittering, reflecting the joy awaiting Jace and Eden. Raina had stared at the dance floor too long, remembering her hopes for dancing under the stars with Casper.

How stupid she’d been to think that there might be a happily ever after waiting for her. That happened to other people, with lives that made sense.