When I Fall in Love(85)

Oh, she hated how he invaded her mind, uninvited, sending regret like spears through her body.

She sighed as she held out her arm for the needle. Denise drew blood, then put in the IV. “When did you start feeling punky?”

“Three or four days ago. I thought I’d picked up a bug, or maybe it was fatigue from the practices for the festival.” Except, if she thought about it, she hadn’t been feeling well all week and had thrown up yesterday too.

Denise took her pulse. Wrote down notes. “Okay, I’ll be back.”

Raina lay back and closed her eyes. The IV flooded cool solution into her veins.

“Hey, there you are.” She opened her eyes and Casper stood above her. Handsome, worry in his beautiful eyes. “Sorry I’m late—I had to dig my bike out of a thousand cars.” He pulled up a stool. “What did they say?”

“I don’t know yet.” She hated hospitals—the smells, the antiseptic, the surreal sense of loss and tragedy that embedded the walls. Everyone acted so cheerful and happy in hospitals. But they weren’t cheerful, happy places. They were places of darkness and fear. Places where ten-year-olds lost their mothers to cancer.

Casper seemed to sense her mood even as he took her hand. “Hey, I can find someone to replace you. It’s no—”

“What?”

He pushed her back down when she tried to sit up.

“No, I’m totally paddling. Are you kidding me? I’m your first mate, right?” The question seemed to hang there between them. She wanted him to grab it, to assure her.

Thankfully he smiled, then touched her face, running his thumb down her cheek. “Yeah. Sure. As long as you get cleared by the doc, you are paddling. And if not, you’re going to stand on the dock and wave us in.”

That made her feel better, she could admit. “I really wanted to go to the dance tonight. I think we can still make it.”

“You know, we could turn on music here. Who needs a band?”

But it wasn’t the same as being in his arms under the starlight, the waves applauding as they swayed to the music. “You should go. Colleen Decker really wants you to dance with her.”

He laughed. “Right. I don’t think I’m going to leave you for Colleen Decker. Besides, there are plenty of guys lining up to dance with her.”

Silly her; she shouldn’t be jealous of an eighteen-year-old, but his words dispelled any lingering remnant.

Denise came back in. “I need to talk to Raina, Casper, so if you want to step out, we’ll call you when we’re done.”

Casper got up even as Raina wanted to protest, but something about the look in Denise’s eyes told her to let him go.

Denise closed the curtain and pulled up the stool. She seemed to be waiting for Casper’s footsteps to die before she said, “I’m trying to gather all the information before the doctor comes in . . .” She paused. “You couldn’t possibly be pregnant, could you?”

A chill went through Raina. She couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe as her brain kicked back over the days.

Oh. Oh, my. She was late—two, maybe even three weeks. She put her hand to her forehead. It prickled with sweat. “I . . . I don’t know.” Her chin began to tremble. How stupid. Of course. She gritted her teeth to keep the tears from forming, but they did anyway, streaking across her cheeks and into her ears. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

Denise patted her arm. “I’ll run a test. In the meantime, just lay here and rest. The doc will talk to you when he comes in.”

The quiet descended around Raina like a fog, cold and suffocating. No. Oh, please, no.

Casper returned. Pulled back the curtain. “So are they going to release—? Raina, are you okay?”

His voice had gone so unbearably soft that she winced, pressed both hands over her eyes. No, no, no—pull it together. He couldn’t know, couldn’t see. How could this have happened?

“Raina? What did the nurse say?”

She shook her head. Then, reaching deep inside, she summoned the strength cultivated from being a girl without a mother, a girl who watched her brother slide into drug abuse, a girl whose father ended up in jail. A girl who spent most of her life alone.

She knew how to survive. She would survive.

Raina ran her fingers under her eyes, forced a smile through the shattering of her hopes. “Oh,” she said, her voice only a little shaky. She cleared her throat. “I’m fine. I just feel silly for being so needy. Why don’t you go to the dance and tell everyone I’ll be there later.”

He frowned. “No, I’m staying here until the doctor arrives.”

“Uh . . . I’ll probably need something to eat then. Would you mind digging me up a sandwich?”