When I Fall in Love(109)
“So . . .”
“So—for how long, Eden? Ten years? Less? And then I get to watch the man I love die an excruciating early death. And what about kids? He’d leave them behind—”
“Shh.” Eden pulled her into her arms.
Grace held on. “I don’t know if I’m strong enough to walk toward Max, knowing I’m going to have to let him go. Maybe he was right to push me away.”
“Grace. You’re one of the strongest people I know.”
“But I’m not. I’m . . . scared a lot of the time. And I’m trying to be the woman who trusts in Jesus, but I just feel like I’m going to . . . well, that I won’t be strong. Not at all. And the worst part is . . .” She stepped out of Eden’s embrace. “I haven’t told him I love him. I wanted to but . . . I think I was scared. Maybe he was right to believe that I would run away. Maybe—”
A knock, and then the door burst open. Tiger ran into the room, dressed in his mini tuxedo, Ingrid on his tail. Her mother wore her game face, the one reserved for those moments when she hid her emotions for the good of the family. Whether those emotions were about Casper and Owen’s fight or her oldest daughter walking down the aisle, Grace didn’t know.
She wouldn’t easily purge Casper’s fight with Owen from her own mind either. The event cast a wretched pallor on the day. Watching her brothers tangle on the floor—well, she’d seen it in jest for years. Never in hatred. They all needed their game faces today.
Her mother came up to Eden with a genuine smile, however. “You are a sight to behold.” She took Eden’s hand, surveyed the dress. “Wow.”
“Mom, they’re almost ready.” Amelia had followed her in, wearing the same blue bridesmaid dress as Grace. She wore her auburn hair in a similar chignon, and for a second, the sight of her stunned Grace into the realization that her little sister had turned into a grown woman.
Who was headed to Europe for her first year of college.
Oh, if only Grace possessed that kind of courage. To leap out in faith, to trust and believe—
“Aunt Eden, you’re so pretty!” Tiger said.
“Are you ready to carry the ring, big man?” Eden asked.
He nodded. And the sight of him, his blond hair all slicked into place, dressed like a miniature version of her brother, so adorable she could gobble him up, made Grace want to weep.
She’d never have one of these. A miniature version of Max. Or if she did, how could she protect him from the fate of his father?
Yes, Max had been right to push her out of his arms.
“Ready?” Ingrid said to Eden.
Eden nodded.
Grace picked up Eden’s train and followed her out. At least one of the sisters would marry her prince.
“Eden Joy Christiansen, do you take this man, Jace Maynard Jacobsen, to be your lawfully wedded husband . . . ?”
Grace listened to Eden say her I do, captured by the expression on Jace’s face.
Max had looked at her that way. In the park, before his phone call.
He could look at her that way again.
Oh, she loved him. Standing here beside Eden, the sense of it could send her to her knees, make her weep.
She took a breath, kept her smile. Oh, God, I love him. But I’m afraid.
Do you love Me?
The voice rumbled through her, the question filling her so she could almost taste it. You know I do.
Then feed My sheep.
“Jace Maynard Jacobsen, do you take Eden Joy Christiansen to be your lawfully wedded wife?”
Give him your heart.
She stilled, hearing the voice twine through her like a whisper.
“I do,” Jace said.
Grace couldn’t help her tears. I will, Lord. But how—?
Walk with Me. Trust Me.
The words settled over her like a breath, a fragrance. Walk with Jesus. Trust Him. Yes. It would be, in truth, the only way. But perhaps that was the point. The more she needed, the more she would lean into Him. The more of God she’d discover.
More.
Could it be that Max was part of God’s more for her?
She glanced at her mother, sitting in the pew just a few feet away. Oddly, Ingrid’s smile was not on Eden, but on Grace.
Live dangerously.
Maybe living dangerously had more to do with faith in a big, unpredictable God than it did doing something foolish. And maybe she didn’t have to do this alone on earth, either.
“You may kiss the bride.”
Jace leaned down and sweetly kissed his wife, catching her face in his hands. “I love you,” he said, loud enough for Grace to hear.
More.
Yes, being with Max, loving Max, would fill her life with more, not less, even when their days turned dark and difficult.
Grace handed Eden her bouquet, casting a look toward the back of the church, where Casper and Owen stood sentry on either side of the door, both looking like they’d rumbled for the Sharks and Jets.