I slept with my daughter’s “uncle.”
“What?” Greg said in shock. “What do you mean, Steven died?”
Liz thrust the phone toward me. “Here, she wants to talk to you.”
I could not get around this with my husband and daughter standing there, staring at me. So I slowly took the phone. “Hello?”
“Nana!” Tahiry cried, which was another punch in the gut.
“Yes?” I said.
She was sobbing hysterically. “They say my dad is dead.”
Both Greg and Liz were staring at me, so I knew I had to sound shocked. “Oh, my God,” I said. “What happened?”
“I don’t know. Some cops just showed up at our door. Mom passed out, she’s up now, but she’s moaning and nobody can get through to her. Granny’s going crazy. Oh, my God! What am I going do? The boys are crying, and I . . . I just can’t believe this.”
“What’s going on?” Liz whispered in the background.
“Can you come over?” Tahiry sobbed. “We need you, Nana.”
How in the world could I say no? “Okay, I’ll be there right away.”
When I hung up, Greg and Liz were standing there, waiting for answers.
“Something horrible has happened,” I said, getting out of bed. “They found Steven dead.”
Greg let out a loud gasp and Liz screamed “No!” as Greg took her into his arms.
“Come on, honey,” Greg said, motioning for me to get up. “You told them we’re on our way over there, right?”
I looked at him and wanted to say “We?” But I just nodded. I knew I had to go through this. I had to go face my friend. Not only did I have to face her, I had to give her a shoulder to cry on. While my husband stood at my shoulder. How in the world was I ever going to live with myself?
15
Felise
IF I COULD HAVE BEEN anywhere else right then, I would have been. I felt like the scum of the earth as I stood in the living room of my best friend’s home. A somber Stevie had opened the door for us. Greg had hugged him, and Tahiry came racing into my arms.
“Nana, why? Why did my dad die?” she cried, squeezing me tight, like she didn’t ever want to let me go. “Whyyyy?”
I held her as my own tears streamed down my face. “Baby, sometimes we don’t understand things.”
“What am I going to do?” Tahiry sobbed.
My guilt aside, my heart broke for Tahiry. She was so much like her father it was eerie, from their beautiful hazel eyes to the dimple in their left cheek to their caring, witty personality. I don’t know if that’s what drew me to her over the years, but I loved Tahiry like she was my own daughter.
“Oh, Felise!” I looked up to see Paula come barreling toward me. I didn’t want to let Tahiry go because I didn’t want to hug Paula. But Tahiry moved aside and into Liz’s arms so the two of them could weep together.
Paula threw her arms around me, and all I could do was stroke her hair as she sobbed and asked, “Why? How could this happen?”
I wished that I could answer that for her. I had no idea why Steven had to die. And certainly not why he had to die at that time and that place. With me.
Greg came up behind Paula and rubbed her back as I held her.
“Paula, I’m so sorry. What happened?” he asked.
Paula stepped back and swiped at her tears. “That’s just it,” she said. “I don’t know. The police said that he was found in his hotel room. All they said was it didn’t look like foul play or anything.”
“I didn’t know he was going out of town,” Greg said.
She buried her face in her hands and sobbed some more. Her mom came and stepped up on the side of her. “He wasn’t. It was the hotel downtown—the Four Seasons.”
Paula sniffed as she tried to explain. “We had a fight, and he spent the night at a hotel. They said he just died in his sleep.”
Greg looked bewildered. “Was he sick?”
“No! I mean, not to my knowledge.”
This thought made Paula wobble like she was about to faint. Greg took her arm and led her to the sofa. While he was cordial to Steven, Greg had a genuine affection for Paula. “Come on, sit down. You don’t need to overexert yourself.”
After he settled her on the sofa, they both looked like they were waiting for me to say something, so I turned to my daughter. “Liz, why don’t you take Tahiry in the kitchen and get her something to drink?”
Tahiry looked at me like she wanted nothing more than to climb into my lap like she used to do when she was a little girl. I nodded to tell her it was okay, and she let Liz lead her out.
Greg eased down next to Paula. “Now, tell us what happened.”