My mom sweeps a lock of hair away from my face.
“I’ve seen how happy you’ve been these past few months. It’s like something bloomed inside of you. I guess that’s what love does. And if Andrew is the reason for that, then I want you to go for it. Get married. Be with him. Don’t let you dad keep you from that happiness. One day he’ll see and understand, just like my parents did.”
I’m crying now, tears that are happy and sad all at once. I have never been close to my mom, but she chose the perfect thing to say. I was carrying around all this guilt, wondering if maybe I made a mistake. I am just about to say that I love her, when Alexandra pops back up with a handful of accessories. I just smile at my mom, and the smile she gives back tells me she knows.
Another hour goes by before we are finally done. I decide that I’ll pin my hair up in a simple bun, and put a crystal comb in my hair. My understated dress means that I won’t need more than a short little veil attached to the comb. It’s not too fussy, and I know that’s just how Andrew likes it. He wants to see me after all, not the dress.
When I come out of the changing room, my mom is already standing at the counter. I go over to her and try to stop her.
“Mom, wait. Andrew has a credit card for me to put all the-”
She waves me away. Alexandra’s paused midswipe.
“Don’t worry about it Noelle. You’re my only daughter. What kind of mom would I be if I didn’t buy you your wedding dress?”
“How much is it?” I ask. I hadn’t looked because Andrew told me that I could spend whatever I wanted. But I know my parents can’t afford to just splurge a thousand dollars for a dress.
“It’s actually on sale,” Alexandra says. “There’s a small stain along the bottom hem.”
“Don’t worry though Noelle,” my mom says. “Patricia can fix it right up for you. You were going to have to cut off the bottom anyways.”
“Well, okay mom. Thank you!”
I pay for the veil and comb, and then we leave the store at last. My mom takes the dress and carefully puts it in her back seat, and then she drives me home. I’m overcome with exhaustion along the way and I decide I’m going to skip class and take a nap instead. Maybe then I’ll start to feel like myself again. My mom offers to take me to the doctor, but I’ve got some Tylenol at home still. She’s doubtful, but agrees when I promise to go to the doctor tomorrow if nothing improves.
Andrew is already home for the day, which surprises me. I knew that he had flown back this morning, but usually when he leaves the office for a trip he has a lot of things to take care of once he gets back. He smiles from the couch and pats the space beside him. I sink down gratefully and put up my feet for him to massage.
“You’re home,” I say happily. “I can’t believe it.”
“Mhm. How was shopping with your mom?” His calloused fingers dig into my poor feet, and it’s both painful and oddly relaxing.
“Good. It took forever, but we managed to pick out something. I was fighting nausea the whole time though. I think I should have eaten something, even though that usually makes me feel sick too. Hey, why are you stopping?”
I sit back up a little. Andrew’s gazing at me solemnly.
“You know Noelle, this stomach bug doesn’t seem to be getting better at all, has it?”
Oh great. Him too? I have my reasoning all ready to go, but then he says something that stops me in my tracks.
“What if it isn’t a stomach bug? I know you’re on birth control, but I checked it today, and it looks like you’ve kind forgotten two or three of them.”
I’m stunned. I mean, I do set an alarm on my phone to take them in the morning. And for the most part, I do. Sometimes I’m late by an hour or something, but I thought that it would still be effective. I try to search my brain. There was that one time when I was late for my business presentation that cost half my grade. I definitely missed that day. I can’t remember whether we had sex after that. I was also definitely late that morning we flew to New Orleans, but it couldn’t have worn off that fast, could it?
Andrew reaches down beside him, pulls out a Walmart plastic bag and tosses it over to me. I peer inside. A pregnancy test.
“Do you think...?”
“Take the test.”
He’s smiling. How can he be so calm about this? A baby would be life changing. Things would never be the same. I shake my head. Somehow I figure that if I don’t take the test, then it can’t be true.
“Noelle, it’s okay. We’ll be just fine.”
“You really think I’m pregnant?” I ask worriedly.