But I knew to touch it was to die.
I'd been avoiding him since the night we'd gone up Mt. Washington on the Incline, barely saying more than a few words to him each day. And earlier that afternoon, he'd burst into my room like he was angry, like he was about to demand I speak to him - but then he just left.
I'd nearly forgotten about that, especially after going home to everything Cameron had surprised me with. That had been the thought taking up the most space in my head. But now that Reese stood before me again, his face tired and worn, I wondered how he'd been. I wondered how he felt, what he'd been thinking.
But I couldn't ask.
The distance I'd placed between us was a safety net, and it was one I intended to keep in place.
"Thanks for helping out, by the way," I said, breaking the spell and putting space between us. "What does she have you working on?"
"I'm writing out the tags for the bidding items," he answered with a grin. "I knew that whole calligraphy hobby I'd gotten into would be good for something someday."
I swallowed. "Oh, so you'll be here with me?"
"All night."
Forcing a smile, I pulled out the first basket, eyeing the items on the table to figure out which I would pair together first. "Awesome. Guess we should get to work."
And that's exactly what we did.
Other than the music Reese had put on for us, we worked in silence. I would pile the baskets high and neat, wrapping them with cellophane and ribbon and flowers in a way I knew Mom would approve of. Then, Reese would take his time writing out a description card and a bidding starting amount. We worked in tandem, in perfect rhythm and timing. As soon as I could finish bundling up a new basket, Reese would put the final touches on the card he'd been writing, and then I'd pass the new basket over.
Reese tried to start conversation a few times, and I'd answer his questions or listen to his stories, but then the words would die down and only the music existed again. I assumed it was the music on his phone, played on shuffle, because none of it tied together. One minute we would be listening to a classical symphony, and the next, a metal band.
///
The minutes turned to an hour easily, and I found myself lost in the methodical task of it all. This was easy for me - using my mind and my hands to accomplish a goal. It was what I lived for, like ticking items off a to-do list or flipping through the pages of a book until the very end.
Mom loved the people part of hosting, I loved the event planning.
"You're quiet tonight," Reese mused after a while, his eyes glancing up at me briefly from where he was writing out a new card.
I untied the bow I'd just fastened, wrapping it again until the loops were perfectly symmetrical. "Just working."
"Can't talk while you work?"
"The music is good," I said, shrugging. "Sometimes it's nice to just work and zone in."
"You always have loved projects."
Reese watched me then, his hand hovering above the ink like there was more to that sentence than just what I'd heard.
"Where's Cameron tonight?"
I paused, thanking the timing of that question. It looked like I was just inspecting the ribbon again, not like I was wishing I wasn't alone in a room with Reese Walker.
I tugged at the end of the ribbon, loosening it again.
"Penguins game."
"Ah, that's right," he said. "Hockey."
"Yep."
I retied the ribbon for a third time, finally satisfied, and slid the basket toward Reese. His fingers overlapped mine for just a second before I pulled them away, reaching for a few of the gift cards we had left to pair with a swag bag from the local golf shop.
"How are you guys?" Reese asked after a moment.
His question shocked me, so much so that I stopped to look at him, but he only continued his careful script on the new card.
"What do you mean? We're fine, of course."
"Fine?" He paused, meeting my eyes with a cocked brow.
I lowered mine.
"Yes, we're fine. We're wonderful. Today, he surprised me by redoing my library for me for Valentine's Day," I added, smiling as I wrapped the basket with cellophane. "It's beautiful. And our anniversary is coming up soon, which is always exciting. I'm sure he has something planned. He always does."
"That's pretty amazing, that he redid your library for you. Was it in need of an update?"
"Not exactly, but he wanted to do something special for me. He wanted to make it a place I loved again."
"Why did you stop loving it?"
I scratched my neck, not happy with the bow I'd just tied. I ripped the ribbon loose again. "I don't know, I just did. Why are you asking so many questions?"
Reese looked at me then, stopping his script mid-word. "Just making conversation."
"Well, we have a lot of work to do. Maybe we should just focus on that."
I wouldn't look at him again, not with his eyes searching me for something. I didn't even know what he was looking for, but something told me that I needed to hide it. Something told me that if I even so much as met his gaze, he'd find what he was looking for.
This was why I'd been put on alert by him saying he'd be here, why my nerves had kicked in on the car ride over to the club. It was why I'd avoided time alone with Reese since the night we went up the Incline. Last time we'd spoken - truly spoken - I'd reminded him I was married. I'd put distance between us, whether he wanted me to or not.
It wasn't that I didn't trust him, or that I didn't want to be friends with him.
It was that I was too confused, too lost to be around someone who brought back so many emotions for me - emotions I'd long forgotten, and ones I never expected to feel again. I was trying to gain my balance with my husband, to find what we'd lost, to bring our love back to life.
That was my main priority.
I could still feel Reese's eyes hot on my neck as the song changed, and when it did, he finally looked away. I took a breath at the relief of not being under his stare, but when he reached forward for the portable speaker we had, I followed his hand.
And that's when I heard the song.
"Reese," I warned. "Don't you dare."
He wore a crooked grin as his index finger tapped the plus volume button over and over, Billy Joel's voice growing louder and louder as it echoed off the walls around us. We were alone in the room, but the entire country club was full with volunteers for the event as well as members enjoying their dinners just down the hall.
"Reese!" I scolded, trying to grab the speaker from his hands, but he stood, holding it high over his head as I jumped up trying to reach it.
///
Mom flew in the door in the next moment, her eyes wild and confused.
"What on earth is going on? Reese, turn that down!"
"Not before we dance!"
Reese flitted across the room to Mom next, placing the speaker high on one of the shelves in the corner before sweeping her up in his arms. I raced to the corner, hopping up and down trying to reach the speaker on the shelf, but it was no use.
Piano Man blared at the highest volume setting as Reese did some sort of attempt at a two-step with my mother.
"Reese, let me go! We have so much to do! I have to call the catering company to triple check the menu and I have to go check on the linens and make sure the tables are set correctly and that the centerpieces are the right height and, and … "
Reese spun her out, twirling her back into his arms just in time for the first chorus to start. He sang at the top of his lungs, off key and too loud, and suddenly, Mom smiled.
And she started singing, too.
My jaw dropped at the sight of it, Mom and Reese floating around the messy tables piled high with prizes still to be bundled and baskets and ribbon and cards and ink. I couldn't believe Mom was dancing, that she wasn't completely freaked out.
And then I realized this was exactly what she needed.
A laugh shot through me as they twirled in my direction, a few of the other volunteers gathering in the door frame to watch and sing along. Reese and Mom threw their hands out toward all of us just in time to sing the famous question the bar had for the piano man in the song.
It was like being in a piano bar, just like the ones I'd gotten too drunk in during my college years. Before I knew it, I was swaying along and singing out loud, too. And suddenly all the stress and tension from the night melted away, all at the hands of the boy next door.
"Alright, alright," Mom finally said through her laughter, pushing at Reese's chest with her tiny hands. "I've got to get back to work. Take over, Charlie."