"Thank you."
Her voice was soft, but not hoarse, and she didn't turn to look at me as she continued writing.
"Feeling better?"
"Much," she said. "Just needed a bit of rest, I suppose."
"Did you have the flu?"
Charlie capped the marker she'd been writing with, turning to me then with a worried expression.
I saw it then, the lie, the one she'd been able to pull off until the moment her eyes met mine.
I'd always been able to tell when she was lying. Her eyes gave her away, the gentle crease of her forehead above her brows, the way her pupils dilated quickly as she moved them around the room.
"No, just a cold, I think."
I nodded.
Westchester was particularly quiet that morning, and the silence surrounded us like a dark, wet blanket, suffocating in its heaviness. Charlie cleared her throat, clasping her hands together at her waist, and I glanced down the hallway before moving into her classroom.
"You sure you're okay?"
Her eyes widened as I moved into her space, and she took a step back, her hip hitting the silver ledge under the white board. "I'm fine."
"You're fine," I repeated, moving in closer.
She was doing everything not to look at me - picking at lint on her skirt, moving markers around under the white board, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.
"You're sure you were sick, that this has nothing to do with Friday night?"
"I was sick," she insisted, but her breath caught when my hand reached forward for her elbow. I held it softly, just enough to let her feel me as I stared down at her, willing her to return my gaze.
"Don't lie to me."
Her eyes fluttered, closing as a long exhale left her chest. Her tiny, cold hand wrapped around my wrist that held her, and she pulled me away. "Reese … "
"Charlie."
And there it was, there she was, the girl I'd spent hours with on Friday night. Her eyes were wide and soft when she opened them again, the chocolate irises taking on a golden hue as they traveled their way up my chest, over my face, finally falling on my own eyes. She swallowed.
"I'm married."
"I know."
Charlie chewed her thumbnail, shaking her head like I hadn't heard her. "No, truly, I'm married. And I know you don't know him, but Cameron loves me. He does. And he needs me right now, we need each other. He opened up to me Friday night when I got home … "
Her words hit me like a sucker punch right to the chest. I felt my breath leave with them, a sickening tide rolling through at what they meant.
He opened up to her.
I wasn't so blind as to not know that meant that he had her that night. She'd given me a piece of herself, shown me her scars, the ones hidden from everyone else - and yet he had taken her to bed. He had watched her melt for him, touched her fair skin, kissed her soft lips.
As her friend, I was happy for her.
As Reese Walker, the true version, I was enraged with jealousy.
"And I just … I really need to focus on him right now. On us."
///
My throat was raw, dry, the act of swallowing damn near impossible, but I nodded despite the thickness I felt there. "Okay."
"Okay," she breathed, and all of the breath she'd been holding left her with that word.
"But hey, I'm here for you, okay? If you ever … I don't know, if you ever need me, I guess. A friend to talk to, a distraction from work, or hell, even just a Wild Walker," I said, and Charlie smirked, her lashes sweeping across her high cheeks. "Just say the word."
"Thanks, Reese."
I finally found the will to swallow as I stepped back, my hands finding my pockets once more. "Always. See you at lunch?"
Charlie smoothed her hands over her skirt. "I think I'm going to grab lunch on my own today, do some reading. But another time."
She smiled, but that simple curve of her lips killed me.
Charlie was pushing me away.
I'd thought I was going at her pace, giving her the space to tell me what she wanted, when she wanted. But somehow, I'd crossed a line. Somehow, I'd lost her - before I'd even had the chance to have her at all.
She's married, I reminded myself. What other way was there to have her, other than the friendship that already existed?
There wasn't.
That was all there was to it.
"Sounds good," I finally said, forcing a smile in return. "See you around, Charlie."
I only hoped I actually would.
Charlie
Sundays were always my favorite day of the week.
Cameron and I usually spent our Saturdays being productive, working around the house or in the garden, volunteering in the community, attending work events for him or school events for me. But Sundays?
Sundays were always for us.
At first, in the beginning of our marriage, we almost never left the bed on Sunday. One of us would jump up long enough to use the bathroom or bring back a plate of food and water, but other than that, between the sheets we stayed. Of course, as the years went on, we began using the day to do other things, too.
We'd go shopping together, or binge watch movies from dawn until bedtime. We'd learn a new recipe together, or put on an old favorite album and dance in the kitchen. Whatever it was, no matter what, Sundays were always for me and Cameron.
I sighed contently, curling up into Cameron's side as Sunday morning slowly made its way through our window. Jane and Edward were starting to rustle, but they could wait.
It had been a long week, even though I'd taken three days off. I'd faked sick for the first time in my life, taking those days just to be with myself - to reconnect. I'd had so many questions when I woke up that morning after happy hour, questions about how I'd acted with Reese, about what I'd felt with him, and, more pressingly, what I'd felt with Cameron when I'd gotten home. So, I took the first half of the week to think, to figure out what all of it meant.
Cameron had been worried at first, but I assured him I was fine. I think part of him knew, too, that I was feeling a bit lost, a bit out of touch. Spending those days in the garden, in my library, cleaning and going through items on our to-do list that I'd ignored for so long - it was exactly what I needed. And now, on Sunday morning, on the brink of a new week, I felt refreshed.
And warm. I was so warm with Cameron's arm around me, my head on his chest, his fingertips drawing lazy circles on my shoulder.
For the first time in a long time, it seemed like everything would be okay.
"Can we dance today?" I asked, leaning up on one elbow to look at Cameron. It was a cloudy, gray day, the sun struggling to break through. The way it filtered through our window cast us both in a cool light, and it was one of those days I didn't want to leave the bed at all.
"I have to work, sweetheart," he said, but his voice was tender, his eyes soft. He swept my hair back from my face, thumb tracing the line of my jaw. "But, tonight. Let me get this done and we can dance tonight."
"Promise?"
"Would it make you happy?" he asked. "To dance with me tonight?"
"It would."
Cameron gave me a lazy smile, leaning up long enough to kiss my nose. "Then we'll dance."
And that right there - that was why Sundays were my favorite.
I left Cameron to his work for the rest of the day, spending most of mine by the fire with a new book I'd picked up at the local bookstore the day before. I paused only long enough to fix us lunch, and to take Jane and Edward out of their cages for a while. I let them fly around our bedroom, all the doors and windows locked, and they'd always fly right back to me, chirping away their thanks for the chance to spread their wings. It always made me laugh to watch them fly, the two of them always intertwined in some way, zooming in and out of each other's paths.
///
They were in love, and even given the chance to fly in opposite directions, to put space between them, they always chose to stay together.
When evening started to fall, I slipped inside my library to put my newly finished book on the shelf. My eyes caught on the copy of Anna Karenina, the sight of it making my stomach flip just as my phone buzzed in my pocket. My brother's name and smiling face lit up the screen, and I smiled, dropping down into my reading chaise before answering.
"Well, isn't this a nice Sunday surprise?"
"Hey, sis," Graham said, and my heart sighed with happiness at the sound of his voice. "Got some time to catch up with your knucklehead brother who really sucks at making phone calls?"
We hadn't spoken in a few weeks, not since he and Christina had been down for Christmas and New Year's, and I didn't realize how much I'd missed him until that exact moment I heard his voice again.