I followed behind her, pausing at the front door as she made her way to the open car door waiting for her. Cameron stood beside it, one hand on the top of the door, his eyes hard on me when I took my place next to Charlie's parents on the door step.
"Don't forget to call me about the fundraiser, Charlie!" her mom called, and Charlie just held up a hand in a short wave, not even looking behind her.
Before she could step into the car, Cameron's hand found the crook of her arm, and she paused, looking up at him. His hand slid up the outside of her coat, up her slender neck to frame her face, and then he bent to kiss her.
When their lips connected, I looked away, down at the half-empty coffee cup in my hands, still stained with her pink lipstick.
"Young love," Maxwell chuffed, smiling at me before clapping me on the back. "What do you say, Reese? Join an old man for a cigar?"
I chanced one last glance at Charlie, and immediately wished I hadn't. She was looking up at Cameron like that kiss had brought her back to life, like he was the only man she ever wanted, and I had to remind myself that he was.
Cameron was her husband. I was the boy who used to live next door.
The sooner I got that through my head, the better.
Charlie slipped inside the car, and Cameron closed the door softly behind her, waving goodbye to all of us on the porch one last time. He watched me the longest, his brows low, and I knew that look in his eyes. He was threatened, and he was warning me. I'd have done the same thing if Charlie was mine.
"A cigar sounds great," I finally answered. My eyes flicked to the window Charlie sat behind, but it was too tinted to see her through it. She was there, she was close, yet she was invisible. She was untouchable.
She was no different behind the barrier of that car door than she was to me in real life, and I needed to remember that.
With that realization, I tore my gaze away and followed her father into his study.
Charlie
"That was some kiss," I said when we were out of my parents' development.
My cheeks flooded with warmth, both from being in the heat after standing outside for so long and from the spark ignited by Cameron's lips. My fingertips fluttered over my swollen bottom lip, skating the smooth surface of it, a flash of the kiss resurfacing just from that.
It'd been so long since he kissed me like that, so long since I felt that kind of possessive passion from him, and all I wanted was to hold on to it for the night.
Cameron glanced over at me before his eyes found the road again. "It was just a kiss."
"It reminded me of the way you kissed me at our first bonfire at Garrick."
///
At that, Cameron smirked, cocking one brow in my direction. "Yeah, well, my fraternity brothers couldn't keep their eyes off you. I had to let them know you were taken."
I flushed.
"That kiss led to a pretty amazing night," I reminded him.
It was the first time I think I really knew we'd be together forever. We'd gone to a hotel off campus, the honeymoon suite with a giant jet tub in the room. Cameron made love to me like I was his wife, even though we'd only been dating a few months at the time.
"It did," he agreed. He smiled wider, and then his right hand came off the wheel and landed on my thigh with a gentle squeeze.
I stared at that hand and smiled, too.
By the time we made it home, I could barely sit still. I might as well have taken three caffeine pills for how the energy in that car buzzed through me. He'd kissed me like he still wanted me, held my thigh like he was proud to call me his again.
It all led me to one overpowering thought: We were going to have sex.
It'd been so long, but after that kiss, after his hand reaching out for me again, I knew we were going to. Just the thought of it, the memories of what it would feel like when his hand first dipped down from my neck and cupped my breast, of what he would taste like after taking his time kissing me between my thighs - those thoughts unraveled me like yarn, his unexpected affection the snag that started it all.
I rushed upstairs, stopping long enough to sing a little song with Jane and Edward before I covered their cage, settling them in for the night. I dipped inside the bathroom next, excitement bubbling like a fountain coming back to life.
When I assessed myself in the mirror, I smiled again. My makeup was still in place from earlier that evening, my cheeks rosy, lips frosted pink. I let my hair down, shaking it out, running my fingers through the waves before peeling off my dress. I hummed, listening to Cameron undressing in the other room.
Want rolled off of me like steam. He was just one room over, stripping down, exposing himself for me. I wanted him so bad it physically hurt to wait any longer.
I let out a long exhale, running my fingers through my hair again as my eyes bounced around my reflection.
My small breasts were perky, dusky pink nipples tight and aching for Cameron's touch. My skin was as white as snow, contrasting the dark hair falling over my shoulders, and I ran my hands down over my slim waist, my hips, imagining his hands on me after months of starvation.
Tonight, he'd kissed me.
Tonight, he'd have me again.
With one more shaky breath, one hand found the cold door knob, and I slowly pushed it open.
Jane and Edward still twitted beneath their black cover a bit, cooing their goodnights to one another, and Cameron was already under the sheets. His back was turned to me, the lamp on his side of the bed casting our bedroom in a soft, warm glow. Just seeing him there, the sheets pooled at his waist, his body expanding with every breath - it set my desire ablaze, the burn of it singeing me from the inside out.
I sauntered over slowly, crawling under the covers behind him.
I hadn't been that nervous to touch him since the first night I ever did.
With shaky hands, I ran my fingers over the hard muscles of his back, pressing myself closer to him so he could feel my naked body against his own. He was so warm, my own skin like ice, and I moaned a bit at the sensation as I lowered a kiss to his shoulder blade. I kissed him softly, trailing my lips over his shoulder and neck as my hand reached low on his abdomen, skating the dusting of hair there.
A breathy moan left my lips as his body rolled into my touch, just marginally, just enough for me to notice. But when I pushed my fingertips beneath the band of his briefs, his hand shot down to wrap around my wrist.
"I'm beat, Charlie," he said gently, pulling my hand up to his mouth instead. He kissed my palm, rolling over to catch my lips next. I tried to deepen the kiss while I had him, but he pulled away too quickly, leaning forward to click off the lamp in the next second. "Goodnight."
And just like that, in one split second, every familiar emotion that had brought me back to life that night died again - this second death even more painful in the warm bed that didn't warm me any longer.
Rejection seeped through me like poison, killing my desire and confidence both in one fell swoop.
I pulled my hand away like it had been burned, rolling over until I lay on my back, my eyes focusing somewhere beyond the ceiling. Cameron lay so still next to me, like he was afraid to move, afraid to breathe - like any clue that he was still awake would have me reaching for him, trying to convince him to want this, to want me.
///
He didn't want me.
My heart squeezed painfully in my chest, and I pressed my fingertips hard over the skin, massaging it as tears pooled in my eyes.
I remembered a time when the thought of him refusing sex would have been laughable. If anything, it was hard for me to keep up with his desire. But time had changed everything. It'd changed me, him, the way we were together. It'd changed our circumstances, our futures, and so much more.
Time had wedged miles between us quickly, but it was taking its sweet time bringing us back together.
I wasn't sure if it ever really would.
When Cameron's breathing slowed and a soft snore let me know he was asleep, I slipped from the sheets and into the bathroom once more. I closed the door behind me quietly, turning the lock, and then I leaned my back against it with a sigh. The tears I'd been fighting back fell in perfect symmetry with the closing of my eyes, but I swiped them away quickly, crossing the beautiful pearl tile to run a hot bath.
My mind wandered as I sat at the edge of the tub watching the water rush in, my fingers lazily dancing across the top of it. I liked the way it bubbled out around my fingertips if I pressed into the water just enough, but not too much to submerge them.
And as my eyes lost focus, memories flooded in.
Cameron and I that night after the bonfire - the bubbles in the bath and in our champagne, too.