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Weight of Silence(40)

By:A.M. Arthur


Eventually their statements were taken and they were sent home. Kai wouldn’t be arraigned until morning, and the chances of him making bail were slim to none. For now, they were safe. Even so, Gavin triple-checked all the locks before they went to bed.

He lay awake for a while, listening to his mother cry quietly in her room while his face throbbed and his stomach ached from the knee he’d taken. So many thoughts tumbled around in his mind. He was thankful Kai hadn’t put a single finger on his mother tonight. He’d promised to kill the man if that ever happened, and Gavin kept his promises. He could be pushed to violence to protect the people he loved.

Maybe he was more like his father than he wanted to admit.

He wanted to call Jace to hear a comforting voice, but it was after midnight. Jace was probably sound asleep. Besides, the way the town gossip mill worked, news of Kai’s arrest would make it to Jace’s side of town by ten a.m., give or take.

Gavin startled out of a light doze by the jangling tone of his cell phone ringing. He fumbled for it from its place on his night table and nearly dropped it. Jace’s name lit up the screen. He stared at it a moment, dumbfounded, before hitting Talk.

“Jace?” he said.

“Actually, it’s Rachel.”

He stared at the shapes on his wall cast by his bedroom curtains, confused. “Is Jace all right?”

“I’m not sure. That’s why I stole his phone.”

“You stole his phone?”

“Borrowed it. He won’t notice.”

He sat up, his curiosity soaring. He’d already had the most bizarre day in history, so what was one more thing? “What’s going on?”

“I’m worried about Jace. Really worried.”

“Worried about what?”

“Does he ever eat at your house?”

“Food?”

“No, motor oil. Yes, food, Gavin, what the hell?”

“Sorry, I’m still catching up here.” He scrubbed a hand across his eyes, trying to think. It would be easier if his cheek didn’t hurt so much. “I mean, he talks about the food he’s eaten before he comes over.” He thought back to the veggie wrap at Mineo’s. “Not really, I don’t see him eat much.”

“Much or at all?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t really paid attention. But he’s lost weight since Thanksgiving.” A knot of dread tightened in his guts. “Doesn’t he eat at home?”

“Not much, if anything. He’s been like this since finals, and he won’t talk to me. I was hoping you knew what was going on.”

He knew Jace worried about coming out, and he worried about going back to school. Gavin couldn’t imagine those worries being so stressful that they’d make Jace stop eating. He remembered the way he’d devoured his plate of food at Thanksgiving, and then gone back for seconds. He’d snacked from various chip bowls at Casper’s party. What had happened to destroy such a healthy appetite?

“Gavin?”

“Sorry, I’m here.”

“Has he told you anything?”

He hesitated. Jace hadn’t asked him to keep it a secret, but it still felt like a betrayal. If Jace was hurting himself, even without doing it on purpose, then it was worth pissing him off. “I know he’s struggling with going back to school. He thinks college is a waste of time right now, and he wants to quit.”

Rachel was silent for a long time. “He wants to quit?”

“Yeah. He just doesn’t know how to tell your folks.”

“Or me, apparently.”

“He’s in a bad place right now, Rachel. He doesn’t want to disappoint your family by quitting school, and he doesn’t want to disappoint them again by telling everyone he’s gay.”

“He talks to you about this stuff?”

“Yes, he does.”

“You like him, don’t you?”

Gavin pictured Jace’s smiling face, and warmth spread inside. “Yeah, I do. A lot.”

“Then please, keep an eye on him. Don’t let him do anything stupid.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. Jace holds things in and lets them stay bottled up, until they can’t go anywhere except out. He’s always been like that, but this time he won’t tell me what’s upsetting him. He’s never shut me out like this.”

“I’ll do what I can.”

“Thank you.”

“Rachel, one question?”

“Sure.”

“Do you have his roommate’s contact info?”

“Ben? Yeah, I think so. Why?”

“You said Jace changed around finals. Maybe his roommate noticed too. He might have some insight. I’d call, but that might be weird.”