I cleared my throat and spoke quietly. “How bad is it?”
“It depends on how you take it. I guess it could be a deal breaker.” She started to cry and I knew it was bad news.
I’d heard of people having affairs only to realize that they just wanted to stay in their marriage. For the life of me, I couldn’t believe she would want to be with an abuser and a liar over me. It made no sense. “Do you want to be with him?”
She fell to the floor in front of me and put her hands on my legs. “Why would you think that?”
I couldn’t look at her. It hurt me too much to look at something that I might lose. “Just tell me what you have to say. It’s late and I don’t think my heart can take much more, to be honest with you.”
She spoke in a whisper. “Conner, please look at me.”
“I can’t. I know what you’re goin’ to say and I don’t think I can handle it. I’m just not ready to hear somethin’ like that.”
She stood up and walked away from my bed. “I was afraid of this. I knew it was just too much to ask. I mean, how could I ever think you were ready to hear something like that? Who would want to be involved with a married person and find that out?” She turned around and faced me. I kept my head down, but I could see her feet facing my direction. “I just want you to know that no matter what, I’m keeping it.”
I looked up at her, because I obviously didn’t hear her clearly. “Come again?”
“I’m keeping it, Conner. There’s nothing you can say to make me change my mind. I didn’t want to tell you, but Rick threatened to tell your family what a whore I was. He said he would make it so they would never accept me.”
I stood up and walked over to her, but didn’t touch her. “Wait, did you just? Are you pregnant?”
She nodded but didn’t speak.
“And it’s mine?”
This time I got a dirty look. “Of course it’s yours. Why would you ask me that? “She backed away from me and got all defensive.
“I just…I thought you were goin’ to tell me you were sleepin’ with Rick still. I didn’t know that you were goin’ to say that.” I sat down on my bed and looked up at her again. “Pregnant?”
She nodded again. “I understand if you’re pissed. I’m keeping it though, it’s not like we can do anything about it now anyway. It’s way too late for that.”
She had her arms crossed over her chest and was waiting for me to say something. I was so shocked that I didn’t know what to say. “What do you mean too late?” I threw my arms up in the air. “Wait, I didn’t mean it like that, I swear. I just don’t understand.”
“I’m too far along, Conner. We’re four and a half months pregnant.”
I stood up and pulled her into my arms. “You said we’re.”
“Well, you are the father, but I meant what I said. If you don’t want all of this, I can do it on my own. I never thought I could have children and when the doctor told me I was pregnant the other day, I was so happy. I want this baby.”
I kissed the top of her head. “Are you kiddin’ me? This is the happiest moment of my life. There ain’t no way you’re raisin’ our child without me.”
She fell into my chest and just burst into tears. “I was so afraid to tell you.”
I cupped my hands on her cheeks. “Listen to me right now. I love you and I want a life with you. I don’t give a shit about any damn lunatic ex-husband. I don’t care about how much money you have and I sure as hell don’t care if you ever work again. I want you and now I want our child. I talked to Ty and he and his dad said I can have a parcel of land on the farm and build on it. I’m goin’ to give us a home and we’re goin’ to be together. Hell, you can even invite your family for Christmas next year.”
“I don’t know what to say.” I wiped the tears that were falling down her cheeks and she smiled.
“Say you want that too. Just tell me you want this. That you’re finally ready to give yourself to me completely.”
She nodded her head. “I am, Conner. You’re all I want.”
I kissed her perfect lips and held mine there as I spoke. “Good, let’s get some sleep. Tomorrow my family is going to eat you alive.”
Chapter 38
Amy
Getting Rick to leave wasn’t as bad as I thought. When I first walked out and saw him standing by the door, I half expected him to drag me out of there. One thing made me feel safe and that was the fact that he didn’t like people to know he was a violent man. With Ty and Miranda lingering around, he kept up with his fake appearance.