treatment. Mimi fancied herself some kind of beauty school dropout, and if she could’ve opened a shop in her bedroom, she’d have given it some
careful thought.
Mimi produced a brush from her pocket and showed it to Sophia before starting to tease. With the brush, that is.
We were pre-partying just like we did at Berkeley, right down to the frozen daiquiris. Although we’d upgraded to the good alcohol and freshly
squeezed lime juice, it stil made us a little hyper and slaphappy.
“Come on, come on—you never know who you might meet tonight! You don’t want to meet Prince Charming with flat hair, do you?” Mimi
reasoned as she forced Sophia to flip her hair over to “get some lift at the crown.” You didn’t argue—you just let her do it.
“I’m not flat anywhere. If these girls are on display, Prince Charming won’t even notice I have hair,” Sophia muttered, which sent me into
another gale of giggles. Then over our laughter, I heard voices from next door. I got up off the bed and went closer to the wal where I could hear
better. This time instead of just Simon, there were two other distinctly male voices. I couldn’t make out what they were saying, but suddenly Guns N’
Roses came blaring through the wal s loud enough to make Sophia and Mimi stop what they were doing.
“What the hel is that?” Sophia snapped, looking wildly around the room.
“Simon’s a GN’R fan, I guess.” I shrugged, secretly enjoying being welcomed to the jungle. I put a headband low on my forehead and did Axl’s
crab dance back and forth, much to the delight of Mimi and the scorn of Sophia.
“No, no, no—that’s not it, fool,” Sophia scolded over the music and grabbed another headband. Mimi screamed with laughter as Sophia and I
Axl-battled. Until, of course, Sophia started to mess up her hair. Then Mimi lunged. Sophia jumped on the bed to get away from her, and I joined
her. We jumped up and down, shrieking the lyrics now and dancing wildly. Mimi final y gave in, and al three of us danced like mad fools. I started to
feel the bed moving underneath us, and I realized it was banging merrily against the wal —Simon’s wal .
“Take that! And that! And a little of…that! No one’s banging on my wal s, huh? Hahahahaha!” I shrieked crazily as Mimi and Sophia watched in
amazement. Sophia climbed off the bed, and she and Mimi clutched each other as they laughed and I thumped. I rocked back and forth like I was
surfing, driving my headboard into the wal again and again.
The music cut off suddenly, and I dropped like I’d been shot. Mimi and Sophia clasped their hands over each other’s mouths while I lay flat on
the bed, biting my own knuckle to keep from laughing. The frenzy in the room was like when you got caught TP-ing someone’s house, or laughing in
the back of church. You couldn’t stop, and you couldn’t not stop.
Bang bang bang.
No way. He was banging at me?
Bang bang bang.
He was banging at me…
Bang bang bang! I gave as good as I got. I couldn’t believe he had the bal s to try to get me to quiet down. I heard male voices chuckling.
Bang bang bang came once more, and my temper flared.
Oh, he real y was an asshole…
I looked at the girls incredulously, and they jumped back on the bed with me.
Bang bang bang bang we pounded, six furious fists raining down on the plaster.
Bang bang bang bang came back to us—much, much louder this time. His boys must have gotten in on the action.
“Give it up, mister! No sex for you!” I yel ed at the wal as my girls cackled maniacal y.
“Tons of sex for me, sister. None for you!” he yel ed al too clearly through the wal .
I raised my fists to bang once more. Bang bang ba-bang bang rang out from my side.
Bang bang! A single fist answered back, and then al was silent.
“Oooohhhhh!” I screamed at the wal , and I could hear Simon and his boys laughing.
Mimi, Sophia, and I stared wide-eyed at each other until we heard a tiny sigh from behind us.
We turned to see Clive sitting on the dresser. He stared back at us, sighed again, and proceeded to lick his bum.
“The nerve, I mean, the mother-loving nerve of that guy! He has the bal s to actual y bang on my wal , on my wal ? I mean, God what an—”
“Asshole, we know,” Mimi and Sophia said in unison as I continued my rant.
“Yes, an asshole!” I continued, stil worked up. We were in the car on the way to Jil ian’s party. The car service had arrived promptly at eight
thirty, and we were soon headed over the bridge.
As I looked out at the twinkling lights of Sausalito, I began to calm down a little. I refused to let that guy upset me. I was out with my two best