God help anyone who tried to use her to get at him. She wouldn’t run, but she would fight with everything she had. And if the time came, she didn’t doubt she would kill to protect him.
Chapter Eight
From the journal of Abby Lane
I’m at the bar again, watching Utah Pearce. I can’t stop myself. I may never find the nerve to approach him, but I’ll never be able to deny my need to see him. There is just something comforting about being in his presence, and knowing that occasionally, he looks my way and notices me…even if it’s only for a brief moment.
He brings me a coke and nachos now without asking. I’ve ordered the same thing every evening since I first came in. I’m nothing if not predictable. And isn’t that one of the reasons why a man like Utah will never give me a second glance. Predictable doesn’t seem to be a quality that attracts him.
It’s hard sometimes. To watch the women who come in and flirt with him. To know one of them will probably get lucky and leave with him. I wish it were me. I sit watching and waiting, and wish it was me he was taking home.
* * * *
Abby cuddled closer to Tah’s side in the sleeping bag. They’d finally stopped for the night. She hadn’t been prepared for the tents and other camping gear Reno and Logan had brought with them, but she was no stranger to roughing it. And as long as she was sleeping with Tah, it didn’t matter where they were.
“How did you know?” The question had been running through her mind since he’d pulled her into his lap and held her tightly, demanding she not leave him.
Tah sighed beside her, one hand wrapped around her back holding her close, while the other played with her hair.
“I don’t know how to explain it, Abby. It’s as if whatever this is inside me knew what you were thinking. It knew, and it was terrified.”
She lifted up on her elbow, so she could see his eyes. “It’s your lion, Tah. How can you still be in doubt?”
‘‘What am I supposed to do? I feel like I’m being torn in two. Every thought, every emotion is a battle of wills. And it’s all happening inside me. I’m fighting in here.” He tapped his fingers against his temple.
“That’s because you’re still fighting in here.” She rubbed over his chest above his heart. “You have to accept him, or you’ll never be whole.”
“How do I accept what I find so hard to believe?”
She was shocked by the pain and rage she saw in his gaze.
“Do you know what I felt when Reno just shrugged his shoulders and accepted that I might have a lion inside me, might turn into a lion some day? I felt rage. I hated him in that moment. The best friend I’ve ever had in my life, and I hated him.”#p#分页标题#e#
“He loves you.” It was easy for her to see how they acted more like brothers than friends.
“Reno may talk about me saving his ass, but he pulled mine out of the fire more than once too. His reflexes are better than any man I know. I swear he’s always known what I was going to do almost as soon as I make the choice.”
“He sounds like a great friend to have.”
“He pointed you out to me more than once. I think he knew we’d end up together.”
“I don’t think anyone would have pictured the two of us together.”
“The first time he saw you, he told me to keep my eye on you. Said he just had a feeling there was more to you than anyone would imagine.”
She gasped in surprise. “Reno said that? I remember him telling you I was looking at you again. You said I was probably looking off in space.”
“I’m sorry, Abby. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I knew you were too good for a guy like me. You’d stick around long enough for me to fall in love, then leave when you finally realized I would never be at your level.”
“My level? What the hell does that mean?”
He was making her sound like a snob. Abby might be a lot of things, but she wasn’t snobby.
“You were right when you said you were the smartest woman I’ve ever met. I just assumed you would want more than a jarhead.”
“Tah, I’ve wanted you since the first day I walked in the door of that bar and saw you. I came in every day just to see you, to hear your voice. I would watch the women flock around you and wish I could be the lucky one you took home that night.”
“You’ll be the only woman in my life, for the rest of my life. I don’t want anyone but you.”
“I fell in love with the idea of you when I was just a child and you were no more than a story. I fell in love with you as a woman who couldn’t seem to give up the little girl’s dreams that you might exist. I walked in that door and took one look at you and felt my heart fall at your feet. Then I touched you, held you, and I knew.”