Erin let her hand drop. “Jake—”
He grabbed his jacket from the back of the couch and left without looking back.
Chapter Fourteen
Two weeks before her due date, Jake started sleeping on her couch. Maybe they weren’t destined for a storybook romance, but he was there for her when she needed him and Erin was grateful for that. The truth was, she couldn’t have made it through the last weeks of her pregnancy without him.
He cooked for her, he cleaned the house, and when he found out they were both sci fi/fantasy fans he brought her the original Star Trek series on DVD, followed by Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Lost. They argued back and forth about which were the best episodes of each show, and the evenings they spent watching each other’s favorites were more fun than Erin would have liked to admit.
When she woke up in the middle of the night, he brought her warm milk with honey and went through the relaxation exercises they’d learned in childbirth class until she fell asleep again.
She’d never been so physically uncomfortable in her life. Every day felt like a week, and when her due date came and went she thought she’d go out of her mind.
“Matthew came ten days late,” Allison reminded her when she stopped by for a visit with her seven week old son. Erin was almost a week overdue.
“I can’t wait that long,” she said, appalled. “I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can hardly breathe. This baby has got to come out, and I mean now.”
“If you can hang on until tomorrow you can have her on Valentine’s Day. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have a Valentine baby? People will always remember her birthday.”
“What would be wonderful would be to go into labor right now. Right this second.” She looked down at her stomach. “Come on, kid, work with me.”
Allison gave her a kiss on the cheek as she got up to leave. “Does Jake have the route to the hospital all mapped out?”
“He’s got everything all mapped out. He bought that special kind of detergent you’re supposed to use on baby clothes, and rewashed all the things I’d already washed. Apparently my regular detergent isn’t good enough for our daughter.”
Allison looked delighted. “That’s adorable.”
“It is sort of adorable, but he’s starting to make me feel insecure. He returned the car seat I bought and got a different one instead. It was twice as expensive as the one I’d gotten. It’s a good thing people are ready to spend obscene amounts of money on custom motorcycles, because Jake is spending money on this baby like a drunken sailor.” She frowned. “I’m afraid he thinks I’m not doing a good enough job. Maybe he thinks I’m going to be a bad mother. I didn’t exactly have the best role model, you know.”
Allison stared at her. “Are you kidding? All he talks about when I see him is what an amazing mother you’re going to be.”
Erin flushed with pleasure, but she wasn’t sure she believed it herself. “I hope I am.”
Allison patted her on the shoulder. “You’re going to do great. And don’t forget, you’re not in this alone. Jake’s going to be a wonderful father.”
Erin thought so, too.
And maybe he did have the right idea about marriage. Why was she so determined to hold out for love, when he gave her so many other things?
But she’d grown up with a man who never said I love you—she knew what a lonely, heart-hungry experience that was. And it wasn’t just that Jake couldn’t say the words. He didn’t believe he could feel it, either.
She couldn’t cave in about this. She couldn’t. It would be a betrayal of her own heart.
After Allison left, Erin tried to do some work at her computer but couldn’t make herself concentrate. She wandered into the kitchen but she wasn’t really hungry.
Her stomach muscles tightened, and she wondered if she was in for another fun night of Braxton-Hicks contractions.
An hour later she knew it was the real thing.
She called Jake at the garage. “It’s time. How soon can you—”
“I’m on my way. Twenty minutes.”
“Don’t hang up! Will you stay on the phone with me?”
“Of course I will. Now take a deep breath.”
He went through relaxation exercises with her over the phone, and he kept going while they were driving to the hospital.
“It’s not working anymore,” she panted, as the contractions grew more intense. “It hurts too much. I can’t concentrate…I…” Another one came, the pain so overwhelming she couldn’t talk through it.
When it was over she looked at Jake, whose face had turned white. “Are you all right?” she asked him.