Wagging my eyebrows, I replied, “Of course.”
“Then get your sexy ass in the shower.”
“My pleasure.”
With my chest constricting in agony, I followed Deacon into the bedroom. My one request of Deacon was to always be honest with me. And here I was being completely dishonest as well as deceiving him. Regardless of the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach, I wasn’t going to back down. I had to do this for me, for Deacon, and for Willow.
But I couldn’t think about what lay ahead just now. I needed Deacon. I needed to be held by him, loved by him, fucked by him. And that outweighed everything else on my mind.
The moment I walked through the clubhouse back door, my brothers launched themselves at me and quickly overtook me. It wasn’t just Rev and Bishop either. Most of the hometown charter, including the prospects, had a go at me. There was pushing, shoving, punching, and some fuckers even low blowed me by kicking me in the shins and the balls. When it was all over, I had a busted lip, what would be a shiner in the morning, and probably some bruised ribs.
But I wouldn’t have taken anything else for having my brothers welcome me back to life in the only way they really knew how. I sure as hell didn’t think I would come in to hugs and tears. That shit was for pussies and the Raiders women.
“I think this calls for a round to celebrate,” Bishop said, jerking his chin at Cheyenne. When I followed his gaze to her, I registered the grief-stricken expression on her face. While she was glad to have me back, she knew she would never have me. My body and, most important, my heart now belonged to Alexandra. Breaking eye contact with me, she got busy pouring beers.
“We’re going to need to sit down in the next hour for church. We need to get you up to speed on all that’s happened the last couple of days,” Rev said.
“Sure, man. Whatever we need to do.” I took in the newly sewn PRESIDENT patch on his cut.
Glancing over Rev’s shoulder, I saw Kim sitting on one of the barstools. In her black jeans, black boots, and black T-shirt, she looked every bit the part of a biker widow. My throat clenched like someone had grabbed me by the neck and cut off my air supply. I would have rather faced down Sigel in a dark alley than have to see her. Picking up one of my feet, I slowly made my way over to her.
When I reached her, tears streamed down her cheeks. “Thank God you’re alive,” she said before she began sobbing hysterically. She threw herself into my arms. She pressed her face into my chest, her cries becoming muffled. But in my head, I heard them just as fucking loudly as if a cannon were going off around me.
“I’m sorry, Kim,” I murmured into her ear. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
Pulling away, she stared up at me. “I know you are.”
“I want you to know I didn’t run out on him. Because of Alex’s wild-ass puppy, I didn’t even get in the house.”
Kim pressed her palm against my cheek. “Oh, honey. I know you wouldn’t have ever sacrificed Case. You loved him as much as he loved you.”
I groaned as the tears I forcefully fought burned my throat and stung my eyes. “I did love him. I loved him like a father—like I loved Preacher Man.” I took her hand from my face and placed it over my heart. “I swear to you that I will protect and provide for you and his kids. Anything you need, you just ask.”
Kim’s expression momentarily darkened. Instead of sadness, anger burned in her eyes. “The only thing I ask of you is to never, ever let one of my sons patch into this club. No matter how bad they want what their daddy had, you don’t let them in.” She shook her head. “I won’t lose my babies like I lost their daddy.”
My mind went to their thirteenand fifteen-year-old sons, Ben and Eric. Since they were little, they’d been at every Raiders family function. They often begged Case to let them come during the week. All they had ever known was a father who was an MCer. I couldn’t imagine even trying to deny them when the time came. I hoped that by then Kim’s grief would have lessened and she would change her mind.
But in this moment, I had to do whatever I could to comfort her. “You have my word.”
“Thank you, Deacon,” she replied, leaning up to bestow a kiss on my cheek.
A beer was thrust into each of our hands. I searched the crowd for Alexandra. When I found her, I motioned for her to come to me. With a shy smile, she wove in and out of the people to join me.
Bishop raised his glass. “To my brother Deacon, who I always knew was a pussy, but since he seems to have nine lives, he now confirms it.”
Laughter went up around the room. Before we could take a sip, Bishop held up his hand. “And to the memory of one of the finest fucking presidents the Raiders ever had. To Case.”