My heart twitched when I remembered my plans to leave without saying goodbye, after everything he had done for me. Now that he was back, my plans wouldn’t change. I’d only have to thank him for his help and then I’d walk out of his life.
He came straight to my room, asking if we could talk. Standing in my doorway, he looked handsome and distinguished as usual, his face clean shaven, dark hair glossy, suit wrinkle-free. But something was different about him. Faint, dark rings framed eyes whose sparkle had faded.. Something weighed down his features—exhaustion.
I followed him down the stairs and into the living room, where he leaned back against the leather couch with a barely audible sigh.
Sweat soaked the fabric under my arms. His presence both drew me in and intimidated me. I couldn’t help wondering how it would feel to have his arms around me, comforting me. It was crazy to think thoughts like that, but it had been such a long time since I had been with a man that cared for me, a man that handsome. It had been years.
He leaned forward and pinched the bridge of his nose.
“Are you okay?” I asked, finding my sense of speech.
He turned to me. The tiredness I’d seen earlier no longer hovered over his features, as if suddenly erased. “Everything is fine. Just that my plans in the last few days were a bit hit and miss.”
“Problems with your business?”
He shook his head. “My business is in great shape. I was occupied with something else.”
“You were dealing with my mess, weren’t you?” I twisted the silver ring on my middle finger, as I often did when I was nervous. My mother’s wedding band. “I’m sorry for putting you through this.” I breathed in. “And thank you.”
He gave a small nod, causing a lock of hair to brush his forehead. He ran a graceful but strong hand through his hair and it fell back into the place he wanted it. “It was my choice to help you. It’s all taken care of now.”
I wrapped my gaze around his and for a moment we didn’t speak. My heart pounded so hard the sound echoed in my ears. I had to ask. “How did you…take care of it?”
“That’s not important.” His tone was firm, final. “What matters now is that you won’t go to prison. You don’t have to worry about it.”
“I don’t know how not to worry.” I bit my bottom lip, trying to keep the tears at bay. “It’s all I can think about. I get nightmares every night.” It amazed me that he could be so calm about it.
“You have to try and move on. You don’t have a choice. You have to forget the past.” He reached out a hand and touched mine for just a heartbeat before pulling away. But he left my skin prickling.
“I don’t know how to do that. What I did will always haunt me.” My voice was hoarse with tears that chocked my throat. “Maybe I should just…go to the police.”
“That’s the worst thing you can do. You’ll be making a huge mistake.” His voice was hard. “It’s no longer just about you. The moment I offered you my help and you accepted, I became part of this mess. I jumped through a lot of hoops to help you.” He paused. “There’s no going back now. Our lives are both on the line here. Do you understand that?”
I nodded and hot tears slid down my cheeks. “Oh god, I’m so sorry about everything.”
“Don’t apologize.” He drew closer and the prickling on my skin intensified. My heart thumped so hard the sound vibrated inside my ears as I enjoyed his closeness. “Haley, you can’t turn back the clock.” He placed an arm around my shoulders. “The only thing you can do now is pretend it never happened, until you believe it.”
I leaned my head against his taut shoulder but he pulled away quickly, as if our contact made him uncomfortable. “Sorry about that.” He stood and moved to the window, far away from me.
“It’s okay,” I said. I kept my eyes downcast, twisting the end of my long, auburn braid. My heart ached. For the longest time I had no one in my life who cared. Having him close had felt so right, made me feel safe even for a moment. His reaction was just the push I needed. I had to leave before I got too attached to him, to his protection. I raised my chin and squared my shoulders. “I appreciate everything you did for me. I’ll no longer be your responsibility. I’ve decided to leave, today. I’ll be careful.”
“No,” he said, turning away from the floor-length window. He loosened his tie. “I can’t risk that. People who are afraid are vulnerable, they make mistakes. If you manage to get yourself caught, it will only be a matter of time before the trail leads back to me.”