She blinked. “And you didn’t tell me?” She went back to hating him a little. God, he fit right in with these sniveling, sneaky, slick SOBs.
He turned toward her then and put his hands on her shoulders. “They specifically ordered me not to. I almost did last night, before we…”
“Before we took a tumble in the sheets?” she finished for him. “Or after you spun me a fairy tale?” She snorted. “I can’t even say we made love now, knowing what I know.”
He tightened his fingers. “We did make love, Nix. I meant every word I said last night.”
“Right.” She shrugged away from him, so angry her vision had taken on shades of yellow. Her forehead felt like thousands of fire ants were biting her skin. A tear rolled down her cheek and she swore, wiping it away with fingers that trembled. “You tell yourself whatever you have to so you can sleep at night, but don’t you dare lie to me. Again.” She met his eyes. “I spend half of my time thinking about how much I love you,” she whispered, not bothering to swipe again at the tears streaming down her cheeks. “And the other half wishing like hell you’d never come back.” She started to leave, her only thought to get out of the building before those two tattletale guards blabbed to the council that she’d lost it in the vestibule.
Tobias grabbed her arm and stopped her. Dragging her with him, he walked over to an office and opened the door, then pulled her inside the empty room and pressed her against the closed door. “Don’t you dare try to lessen what I feel for you,” he said, his voice a fierce rasp. “I walked away from you five years ago because I loved you, because I thought it was for the best—for you—and it was a mistake. One I’m not about to repeat by letting you walk away from me now.” He gave her a little shake. “Whatever else you may think of me, Nix, you know I’ve never lied to you. Never.”
Nix met his gaze, a little shocked to see his eyes were moist. He was always so strong, so tough. So proud. Yet he was a caring and sympathetic man, one with strong principles and even stronger passions. She shouldn’t be so surprised.
He was right. He’d always been honest with her, sometimes brutally so. The fact that he’d thought about disobeying orders on something that wasn’t life threatening said a lot. She just wasn’t sure it was enough. He knew how much this job meant to her, knew it was the best way she had to prove her worth to herself. After so many years of being rejected by family, this job was all she had. All she was.
The pheromones rolled off him in undulating waves. As a tear dripped off her chin, he muttered a low curse. He brought his hands up and cupped her face, then slanted his mouth over hers.
Her eyes fluttered closed. Lightning traveled from her lips to her core, tightening her nipples along the way. With a moan of surrender, of longing, of desperation, she wrapped her arms around him and held on.
Nix ran her palms across his ribs and over his broad chest, letting her thumbs brush across his nipples. He groaned and pulled her closer, one strong hand just below the small of her back, pressing the knife scabbard into her flesh and her belly against his erection. The kiss deepened, tongues dueling, and she threaded her fingers through his soft hair, holding his head where she wanted it.
She had the hard door behind her and an equally hard man in front of her. She shivered, her arousal climbing another notch. He pulled back a fraction, slid his tongue over her bottom lip and then sucked on it. She moaned again. He nipped her lightly and drew back. “We should get going.”
Nix sighed and rested her hands against his chest. The council hadn’t fired her. She’d continue to do her job, just not on this case. “Don’t you mean you should get going?”
“I said what I meant.”
Surprise shot through her. “You still want me to go along.” The words came out flat, more of a statement than the question she’d intended. “Isn’t that against the rules or something?”
“Someone I greatly admire told me not all that long ago that sometimes rules are made to be broken.” He pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose. “Something tells me this is all wrapped up with that rift device, Nix. I need you on this. So let’s get out of here, okay?”
“Okay.” She stared at him, searching his eyes. Maybe he had changed, after all. The old Tobias would never have allowed her to participate in something the council had declared was off limits to her. She swiped the moisture off her face with her fingers, then wiped her hands on her jeans. “Do I look like I’ve been crying?”