I snapped my head up to meet his eyes. This must have been what Michael had to take care of this morning. He must have handed in his notice with immediate effect.
Knowing I had to say something, I just nodded. “Yes. Do you want to come in?”
Paul smiled and I motioned for him to come into the flat. I wasn’t sure what he wanted. Hopefully it wasn’t bad news as I don’t think I could take much more today.
“Would you like a cup of tea?”
Paul shook his head. “It’s okay. This is just a brief visit. I have some news for you.”
Sitting down next to him on the sofa, I said, “Oh?”
“I wanted to tell you in person because I thought you were owed that much. It’s Daniel. He pleaded not guilty in court. You’re going to have to give evidence about what he did to you.”
No, this wasn’t the news I wanted to hear. I didn’t relish the thought of having to get up in a court of law and tell the sordid details. I didn’t much like the idea that someone may tear my life apart and make me out to be something I’m not.
“Will his wife have to give evidence, too?”
Paul nodded. “I’m afraid so.”
“Then I’m not alone in this.” I sighed, sinking back in my chair, fresh pain flooding me. I couldn’t even begin to think about the situation with Daniel right now. That seemed like miles away compared to the grief I had over losing my guardian.
“You look so lost, Cassie. I wish I could make it better for you.”
I smiled, even though I was dying inside. It was going to take a lot for me to get through this. I had a goal to set for myself, and I was determined to see it through.
I had to remember. I had no other choice.
“I feel like I’ve lost my best friend, Paul.”
Paul raised his eyebrow. “Best friend?”
Nodding, I put my head in my hand, trying hard to keep it together. I felt Paul’s hand on my shoulder.
“I must admit, it did shock us when Michael came in and said he was leaving. Mind you, if my mother in another country needed me, I think I’d go running, too.”
So this was the excuse he gave. His mother needed him. Maybe he was right in his own unique way. I should imagine she would be needing him now. She must have missed him dearly all this time he’s been down here on earth.
“I’m sure he’ll miss you, but I’m sure you’ll see him again.”
I gripped my hair in my hand, trying to fight back the tears. I wasn’t going to see him again. He was gone forever, never to return.
I felt Paul squeeze my shoulder, so I nodded. I looked up into Paul’s eyes and smiled. I wanted him to see I was okay, even though it was obvious I wasn’t.
Edging closer to me, Paul pulled me into his arms. I welcomed the hug, even though it was nothing like an angel’s hug. I didn’t feel the calm, the warmth, or the love flowing through.
“I’m sorry,” Paul said as he pulled back, pushing a strand of hair behind my ear.
A flashback immediately came to me of when we were sitting in the canteen at work and Stephen did the same thing. I was so enraptured by the flashback, I didn’t even realize Paul still had his hand on my face.
I looked into his eyes and I could see him edging closer. It all seemed to spin past me. Alarm bells were going off in my head, but I couldn’t seem to move, couldn’t seem to function. It was only when his lips pressed against mine that I shot out of my seat.
“I’m sorry, Cassie. I don’t know what came over me. You just looked so sad and I wanted to take that away.”
Oh no! That vision. That vision I had of him leaning in to kiss me that time in the television room at work. It was when I had just heard everyone was gossiping about Stephen, Michael and I, and the thought of it all gave me a headache. I rushed there to get away, but then Paul came in and comforted me. He placed his hand on mine and I saw myself through his eyes. I saw how upset I was and I felt his desire to kiss me.
Shaking my head, I ran to the door to open it. “Don’t worry about it. It’s fine, but I think you should go. I was supposed to visit my uncle. He would have expected me ages ago.”
Sighing, Paul rose to his feet with a smile. “Of course. I didn’t mean to pry. I just wanted to tell you the news.”
Calming down a bit, I realized how rude this must look. I didn’t ask for him to kiss me, but I didn’t exactly stop him in time, either.
“Thank you,” I finally managed with a smile. “I’m sorry if I was a bit abrupt. It’s just been a long day for me.”
Laughing, Paul strolled out the door. “Don’t worry about it. Maybe now wasn’t the right time to visit. Take it easy, Cassie. I hope your shoulder’s doing okay.”