Lindsey’s Wolves(31)

She wanted them. Both of them. Needed them.

Now if only she could get that feeling from her heart into her brain.

Let go of all learned responses and embrace new ones.

“I think if you’d give this a chance, you’d see that it’s going to be okay.” Ryan’s voice shook. His words were planned and hesitant.

He coughed into his hand. “We have an idea. Would you just listen? Don’t say anything yet, just hear us out and then think about it. Okay?”

She nodded. Tears welled up behind her eyes and she willed them to stay at bay. She didn’t even know why she was about to cry. Was it for the life she thought she’d have now a thing of the past? The pain she witnessed in the eyes of these two men she was so fond of?

Ryan reached across the table and squeezed one of her hands in his.

Alejandro glanced his way, but said nothing. Obviously it hadn’t been in the plan to touch her.

“My family has a cabin not far from here.” Lindsey glanced from the hand covering hers to the source of the voice.

A cabin?

“We thought, if you’d agree, we could go there for a few days, maybe a week, and get to know each other better.”

This didn’t sound like a good plan. A week? In the woods … alone … with two men she wanted more than life itself? Not a good idea, not at all. She’d never be able to last even one minute without jumping one of them. Or both, you dolt.

And, that’s the point.

“No pressure,” Ryan added, squeezing her hand even tighter. “We just think it’s kind of hard to explore our feelings properly here, with everyone else around.”

She exhaled long and slow. They were right, of course. But that didn’t change anything. She didn’t have to be anywhere particular this week, or next. School would start soon and she’d be teaching, but for now she was free. Sort of. This wasn’t what she’d had in mind for the last few weeks of her last vacation before entering the real world.

Lindsey pulled her hand from Ryan’s tight grip and leaned her forehead on her palms, squeezing her temples. Her head started to pound. It almost seemed … loud … in the quiet silence of the room.

“Okay.” She heard the voice, knew it wasn’t theirs. What the hell was she thinking? Why would she agree to such a thing? Next thing you know I’ll be doing a strip show for a two-man audience. And then what? Sky’s the limit?

The gasps across the table reminded her of her severe lack of privacy in all matters.

Would nothing be sacred to her anymore?

Finally, Alex spoke. “We promise on our very lives to let this … relationship … move at whatever speed is comfortable to you. We would sooner die than hurt you in any way, emotionally or physically. You have to believe that if you believe nothing else.”

His sincerity cut into her heart and the tears she’d held back for so many minutes tumbled down her face while she stared at first one man and then the other.

Both reached forward and wiped the cheek on either side of her face with the pads of their thumbs. Lindsey leaned into their touch, tilting her head into first one palm and then the other. She felt their earnestness in their touch. And she believed them in her heart.





Chapter 6





The drive to Ryan’s family cabin was tense. Lindsey sat in the cramped back seat behind Alejandro. They’d wanted her to sit in front, between them, but she’d vehemently declined. How the hell was she supposed to think with both their thighs pressed against her? Wasn’t happening.

“It’s not much farther.” Ryan glanced back at her, smiling genuinely.

Her fingers ached from gripping the leather seat on either side of her legs. She’d initially grabbed on to avoid fidgeting, but now they were on a gravel road and instinct lead to necessity as she bounced around behind Alejandro.

The men hadn’t said more than a few words to each other. Out loud anyway. Judging by the glances passing between them at regular intervals, she’d bet her pants they were engaged in quite the heated discussion.

Well, maybe “pants” wasn’t a good choice.

Lindsey turned to stare out the window, her face heating at the idea these two were actually conversing silently about her. Planning. Plotting. She shivered for the umpteenth time, considering the possibilities.

It unnerved her.

“Is that it?” Lindsey glanced up to see where Alejandro was pointing.

Cabin? “You said, ‘cabin.’ That’s … well, not a cabin.”

“It is to us.” Ryan chuckled. “I have a large family. When we get away, we need a lot of space.” He pulled the car to a rolling stop.

Lindsey let her jaw hang open as her gaze roamed the front of the “cabin.” “It’s beautiful.” The front porch alone was glamorous enough that she believed she could spend a week sitting on it without even going inside. Might be safer that way.