Blood of the Underworld(88)

“You’re wrong,” Daverik said. “Karak showed you forgiveness. He gave you a chance to repent, to make right the wrongs...”

“What wrongs?” She laughed. “Our love wasn’t wrong. It wasn’t sin. It was just against the rules. It complicated things, made people worry. But you were lashed, and I imprisoned, and now you come here, to remake the order that took me from you. You’re a disgrace.”

“They didn’t take you from me,” he said.

It felt as if a fever had overcome her, and she laughed again. Her hands were giant throbs of pain, and she could not feel her individual fingers.

“They didn’t? Then who?”

“It was me,” Daverik said, and he looked away as if ashamed. “I told them of our affair.”

The last words he’d spoken to her echoed in her head.

I’m sorry...

“You bastard,” she whispered. “You damn, stupid bastard. Why? Why would you do that to us?”

“Because we would have been caught,” Daverik said, standing so he might pace. His eyes never met hers. “Because it was only a matter of time. And because it was wrong. I neglected prayers, I stopped paying attention in services. I only thought about you, cared about you. When I should have been meditating, I was thinking of seeing you, imagining what I might do the next time we...”

He stopped himself. Frustrated, he struck the wall with his fist. Zusa wanted to feel fury, to feel betrayal, but instead she saw the torment deep within her former lover, and suddenly she knew what brought him back.

“You came to Veldaren for me,” she said. “Just for me.”

He looked to the door, nodded his head.

“I’ve felt guilt every single night I lay down to bed. I thought it would get better. I thought the certainty of my faith would prove what really mattered, and that in time, with separation, I’d know without a doubt I’d been right. But it never happened. That I am to train the new Faceless is a cruel joke, Zusa, but I did it for you. You can come back. We can be together. Perhaps not as we were, but I’d still see you, still be able to hear your voice.”

He breathed in deep, then let it out in a sigh.

“My decision cost you your faith in Karak. I have committed no greater a crime than that.”

Zusa’s anger had been softening, but those last words were like Vrashka’s needles, only this time piercing her heart.

“Are you really still so blind?” she asked. “You carry guilt not for my torment, but because I turned my back on Karak?”

“What could be worse a crime?” he asked. “To see you lost to the fires of the Abyss...”

He approached her, knelt before her so they might see eye to eye. His hand gently stroked her cheek, brushing away tears.

“Come back to me,” he whispered. “I don’t want to lose you, not again, and not forever.”

He looked so young then, so much like the boy she’d loved. His face was leaning ever closer. She knew what he wanted to do, but could not stop him. As his lips closed around hers, she felt her insides twist and curl with turmoil. She felt fury at his foolishness, yet hope that he might free her. She felt sick at his desires, that he could find beauty in her while captive and tortured, yet at the same time it was so easy to slip back into the past, to escape from her cell into memories of him and her, young, foolish, and clumsy. She felt pain, sorrow, and betrayal.

Her lips did not kiss him back. When he tried to kiss her again, she turned to the side and steeled her gaze at the wall.

“You’re a cruel, evil man,” she whispered.

“You don’t mean that.”

“I do. You were a fool, a naive child to have done what you did. But that was then. For you to still think it now, to kiss my naked face while begging me to have it covered, shows just how sick your soul has become.”

His whole body tensed, and for a moment she thought he would strike her. But he did not, only stood and went to the door so he could lean his back against it.

“I warned you to stay away from Alyssa,” he said. “That she still lives is a miracle, but it won’t be long before her death. It’s inevitable, Zusa. You should know that. We are the servants of Karak, and we will not be swayed.”

“What has she done to you?”

“It’s not what she’s done, but what she represents. The world is changing, and we are paving the way for the end times. The order has been given to take her life, and bring the Trifect crumbling down.”

“Who?” Zusa asked. Despite her situation, she had to know. If she was to die, at least she could know who desired it. “Who gave the order?”