“I’ll speak with Stephen about arrangements,” Alyssa said to Zusa. “See if you can find him a room.”
Zusa frowned but did not object. She offered Nathaniel a hand. He stared at it. She wore plain clothes, as if she were a servant. Try as he might, he could not ever remember having touched her bare skin before, just her wrappings. Feeling the eyes of his mother upon him, he took it, nodded for her to lead the way. He did his best to hide his surprise at how soft Zusa’s hands were. His mother kissed his forehead, and then they were away, crossing the expansive yard surrounded by fences and weaving through the bustle of servants and guards.
Once inside, Zusa looked down both sides of the hallway and frowned.
“Stephen has little family,” she said. “Surely there must be plenty of rooms worthy for a little prince such as you.”
“I’m not a prince.”
Zusa smirked at that.
“Given the wealth of your mother, you might as well be one, Nathan.”
A few of the house servants ushered past them, but Zusa seemed reluctant to bother them. Instead she picked a direction, and together they traveled deeper into the mansion. Nathaniel stared at the walls, mesmerized by the many paintings. Some were of fields and mountains, crystal blue streams running through green hills. Others were of grim men and women, dressed in fine clothing of times past, smiles seeming such a rarity in these people of wealth. Nathaniel frowned. Maybe it was just the way they wanted to look, to be remembered. Why was it so wrong to be remembered laughing, to be thought of as kind?
Of course, he knew what John would say to that. Those with power had no time for games and smiles. Too many others might suffer for it.
“Anywhere is fine,” Nathaniel said when he realized Zusa was still searching for a room he might use.
“For you, perhaps,” Zusa said, stopping a moment so she could duck her head between large double doors opening into a vast room. “But I will be keeping an eye on you while we’re here, and I would have you sleep somewhere safe.”
“There’s guards all over,” Nathaniel said as she tugged on his hand. “Mother said Lord Connington even hired extra. Why wouldn’t we be safe?”
Zusa stopped. She pulled free one of her daggers and then spun low so she could grab his neck with one hand and press the tip of her blade against his throat with the other. Nathaniel didn’t react, too stunned and confused. There in the dim, long hallway they were alone, the mansion strangely silent.
“There are a hundred guards swarming about outside these walls,” Zusa whispered to him. “But not a one could stop me from killing you this second. Guards don’t mean safety. Walls don’t mean safety. We are safe only when we are strong enough to protect ourselves, and right now, you are but a child. Until you are grown, I must protect you as well as your mother.”
She stood, let go of his neck.
“But you’ll protect me,” he said. “How is that any different than Lord Connington’s guards?”
“I protect you because I am loyal to your mother,” she said, putting away her dagger. “But who are Stephen’s guards loyal to?”
“To...to Stephen, but that doesn’t mean they’ll let something bad happen to us.”
Zusa shook her head.
“Always know the loyalties of the hands you put your life in. You will one day be a Lord of the Trifect, Nathan. You cannot rely on the honor and decency of men to stay alive.”
“So I should trust no one?” he asked. It sounded like a cruel lesson of an even crueler world awaited him when he grew older. Zusa stared at him, and he saw a bit of her hard facade fade. She knelt again, put her hands on his shoulders.
“Trust those you love, and that love you in return,” she said. “It will hurt more if they betray you, but at least you’ll still know joy.”
Zusa nodded toward a simple door that looked almost quaint compared to most of the rooms they’d passed.
“In there. Let us see what we find.”
She took his hand again, and they stepped into a fairly plain room, just a small bed, a dresser for clothes, and a washbasin with a mirror in the corner. Zusa looked about, analyzing things in a way Nathaniel doubted he would ever understand. She checked the window, the door, beneath the bed, and then nodded.
“I must look outside first, but I feel this will be safe,” she said. “The door is sturdy, and you can bolt it from within. The window is high, but you should be able to crawl through and land outside without breaking any bones. Those unfamiliar to the mansion will not think to find you in such a small, unadorned room.”
“There’s also a lot of shadows near the ceiling,” Nathaniel said, and his look made Zusa smile.