Jackie paced in front of the fireplace. “I told you he wasn’t blood-kin to me. And he’s not. He married my grandmother long after my father was born.”
“And that means you didn’t lie? You don’t lie to your mate, Jackie.”
Back to “Jackie”. Guess she wasn’t his “angel” any more. “I didn’t know you,” she snapped at him. “While the tattoo on your shoulder told me you were one of his, I didn’t know you.”
A muscle twitched in his jaw. “And you didn’t want to know me.”
“I knew enough to not want to go there, so yes. Soldiers, wolf soldiers, enjoy the thrill of the hunt. The rush is addictive. Soon they need more of a challenge, more danger to satisfy their beast. Before you know it, they leave behind everything, including their mates, to sate the blood hunger.” She stopped and glared at Zan. “I won’t be a part of that.”
Zan was shaking his head. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
She held out her hand, palm up, when he began to advance on her. “Yeah, Zan. I do. My uncle did that. He left his mate, my aunt, alone for months on end while he went on his missions and continued to do so long after he could have retired or transferred to a less dangerous position. He had absolutely no qualms about doing it, thinking only of what he wanted and not what she needed. Then he convinced his son that the rush was beyond anything imaginable. Got him hooked on the danger. And then they both died. No matter what you might think, Zan, you are not invincible. You continue down this road, you will die.”
“We all die, Jackie,” he said softly.
“But most of us don’t go looking for it.”
His mouth opened. Slammed shut. He looked away. “I met your uncle. Twice. There was something, different about him. Dark. Uncontrollable. His beast had a tighter rein on the man than the man had on the beast. Some people are just like that. Shifters, human, males, and females. The darkness takes over and they get addicted. To danger, drugs, sex.” He turned back, staring at her, hard. Eyes filled with intense emotion. “Until something slaps them in the face and they wake up.”
Yeah, she knew her uncle had been different. Darker. Addiction had it’s own scent and while she couldn’t sense the same darkness in Zan, she knew he relished danger. “Please. I saw the way you looked at Dean and Kaylie’s. You were excited about Shider. The stupid games, the hunt, taking down prey, that’s what turns you on.”
“You’re what turns me on. My woman. My mate. At my side. In my arms.”
“Bullshit.” She hissed.
“Oh, so now you think you know me well enough to tell me what I was thinking or how I was feeling? Who’s throwing out the bullshit now, Jackie?”
Seething, because he was right, dammit, Jackie swiveled on her heel, presenting him with her back, and shoved her hands in her hair.
He came up behind her, turning her gently. Two fingers lifted her chin. “I’m a dominant male shifter. I like to be in charge, to hunt, to win. You know that. You’re own alpha is like that and you don’t have a problem with him.”
“As he’s not my mate, the point to moot.”
He sighed, a long heavy breath that fanned her bangs. “Why can’t you get past your preconceptions and see me? I need you to see me. I’m not like your uncle. What I do, my job, doesn’t define me.”
Her shoulders tensed. “And how can I be sure of that?’
His thumb traced her lower lip. “Give me a chance. Give us a chance. Get to know me.”
Her eyes wanted to shut. Damn him. He was making her melt with his touch, his words. He sounded genuine. Ready, willing, and anxious even, to make a go at a permanent relationship.
She just didn’t know if she had it in her. Years of expectations and beliefs couldn’t be erased so easily. Years of a different kind of addiction. The irony didn’t escape her.
She swiped her lips with her tongue. “I don’t know if I can.”
“Try.”
Chapter Seventeen
After a lovely dinner Jackie spent over an hour chatting and cleaning up the kitchen, with the very pregnant and beautiful Marion. The men closed themselves off behind a heavy and solid wood door that Marion told her was once the dining room. Since the kitchen was large enough to easily accommodate a setting of twelve, the dining room had been converted into a conference room. Or war room. Depending on the topic at hand.
Once the kitchen was spotless, Marion took Jackie on a tour of the house and showed her where Jackie’s room was. When Jackie caught Marion yawning, she coaxed the fair-haired girl to bed, explaining that she had no problems entertaining herself until her grandfather sought her out after his meeting as he’d told her to wait for him. No doubt the old man wanted some alone time. All the better to grill her.